<p>But religion has become an issue in our relationship. I believe in God but I don't go to church. She is a devout Baptist. We are both very serious in our relationship and she doesn't know if she would be happy if I don't convert or if I stay at home while she goes to church. And then come the kids. She is also worried that God doesn't "want" us to be married. I think that's retarded, and I don't think a specific denomination (or even a religion) should matter in the eyes of God. Anyway, I can't live without her so I'm trying to be understanding, but I don't know what I can do.</p>
<p>quirky, if she’s a devout Baptist, there’s a very high likelihood she IS a Republican… at least, that’s a big correlation where I live!</p>
<p>Honestly, I don’t date people who are religious. I’m agnostic and don’t really give a flip about religion in general. Every guy I’ve dated is either atheist/agnostic, or occasionally, really chill “believes in God” but isn’t religious (like, maybe goes to church on special occasions like Easter or Christmas). </p>
<p>There’s no point in converting if you don’t actually believe it. I think you’ll probably start to resent being forced to go to church. That way lies a bad relationship…</p>
<p>If you convert, you’ll end up resenting her for forcing you to comply with beliefs you don’t agree with. </p>
<p>If you don’t convert, she’ll end up resenting you and thinking God will smite her for marrying a non-Baptist. </p>
<p>i’m guessing her religion also impacts your relationship in other ways? Um I don’t wanna be awkward, but I’m guessing you’re not getting laid either…if you can handle other parts of her beliefs (like waiting till marriage for sex) you can probably handle going to church with her now and then (not every week). good luck with this.</p>
<p>I say this because I’m Jewish and I’ve NEVER dated someone Jewish.
I really don’t care either, I know my parents sometimes tell me “Marry a Jewish girl” </p>
<p>but really, I DON’t CARE</p>
<p>has anyone ever watched “Keep the Faith” with Ben Stiller?</p>
<p>Yeah, F religion issues, religion doesn’t matter (and shouldn’t) matter in a relationship!</p>
<p>Haiku - You don’t have to answer this if you don’t want to, but I remember you saying on one thread you’re a Mexican immigrant, and Japanese on another thread, and now you’re Jewish - are you really all 3? Like Japanese/Mexican immigrant of the Jewish religion? that’s a really unusual combo! </p>
<p>I agree religion shouldn’t matter in a relationship, but many religious nutbags would disagree.</p>
<p>Mexican born, therefore mexican
Immigrant, since I came to the US in 2002
Religion-Jewish, yes, WEIRD as heck for someone Mexican, the Jewish side comes from my mother’s family who are Spanish Immigrants. Mexico’s Jewish population is less than 4%
Japanese, from my dad, he’s half asian Japanese.</p>
<p>Yeah, I’m weird, I KNOW.</p>
<p>In school I was called Mexi-Jew or Asian Mexasian</p>
<p>Can’t live without her? Everyone says that about their boyfriend/girlfriend when they are young, especially their first. You should tell her directly that you will never convert or go to church because you don’t want to.</p>
<p>Honestly, the only reason most people believe is because their parents taught them to. I agree that relgion doesn’t matter in the eyes of god (assuming he exists). Personally I think god exists but doesn’t interfere with our lives (like Jefferson and Einstien). </p>
<p>If she can’t deal with you not wanting to go to church and converting then your relationship probably doesn’t have a future. You might consider a compromise, like going once or twice a year on special days. Otherwise, it is going to be something she will have to live with. </p>
<p>Why should you have to conform to her beliefs? Why doesn’t she stop going to church because you don’t want to go? Sometimes you need to put your foot down and not give her what she wants, if you become her lap dog she’ll lose respect for you.</p>
<p>This is your girlfriend’s argument as I understand it:</p>
<p>On the first day of the week, you must go to a specific building and listen to a man read out loud from a book you could buy for $5. If you don’t attend this lecture, an all-powerful Man-In-the-Sky who created the heavens and the earth and all the creatures that creepeth will be upset, and burn your body in a fiery pit for eternity. </p>
<p>If you agree with your girlfriend’s logic, by all means, comply. If not, tell her how you really feel.</p>
<p>“Christianity - The belief that a cosmic jewish zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree…yeah, makes perfect sense.”</p>
<p>I don’t think I put the link to where this is written, but feel free to pm me if you want it.</p>
<p>What is it with you people? Don’t belittle the man. He’s not going to change his belief structure based on your snide little comments. Stop stroking yourselves with your self-righteous, inflammatory posturing.</p>
<p>^ What are you talking about? No one’s belittling the OP. Re-read the first post - his girlfriend is the devout zealot, not him. He stated he thinks her beliefs concerning marriage are “■■■■■■■■”. no one’s asking him to change his belief structure at all…sheesh, did you even read any posts on this thread before accusing everyone of being self-righteous (which, ironically, is how you came across in your post)?</p>
<p>Don’t convert for her. That’s stupid. Your beliefs are just that–yours. I’m an agnostic too and you can bet I wouldn’t be converting to anything just to please someone else.</p>
<p>Communicate with her. Explain that you just do not believe in what she believes in and she needs to accept AND RESPECT THAT, or hit the road. Personally, I would dump her because worrying that “God doesn’t want you to be together” because you aren’t the same religion makes her sound like a crazy zealot. But talk to her first.</p>
<p>Don’t get too upset if you end up breaking up with her. Remember, if she’s one in a million . . . then there are 5,000 other people on earth just like her. ;)</p>
<p>I guess you did ignore his post…he says he believes in God, but isn’t religious like his girlfriend and thinks it’s ■■■■■■■■ that she thinks god doesn’t want them to be married. he loves her but doesn’t seem to want to convert like she’s asked. in case you ignored the rest of the thread as well, basically everyone gave him a bit of advice and only 1 post bashed christianity (although I admit my post poked fun at his GF a little, even if all i did is restate her views and ask if he believes in them).</p>
<p>Not worth converting. Really the only way relationships of people with different faiths work is if they are extremely liberal, as in almost being relativists. Unfortunately, baptists are usually some of the least liberal. It would cause problems down the road.</p>
<p>and to Euler, what you described is Deism. Jefferson was agnostic and Einstein never really clarified what he believed other than denying the existence of a personal god.</p>