<p>Okay, I really need some advice here. I was accepted to UC Santa Cruz and UC Riverside. They both provide dorms which I can probably afford due to financial aid. I don't want to room alone for safety reasons. However, I have autism and it might be hard to explain that to my roomate once they see some of my behaviors.</p>
<p>I can't stand seeing people nude. I share a room, and I screamed when my stepsister came in totally naked after taking a shower. I am obsessed with physics, and I can't seem to stop talking about it. I like taking stuff apart which can be noisy. I'm an early bird. I often get up at 7:00am on the weekends. There are some positive things about me. I can solve any math and/or science problem. I can get rid of viruses/malware from a computer too. How do colleges determine who you will room with? What if you dislike each other?</p>
<p>I don't have much experience with this, but I can answer one question for sure: some colleges put people together pretty randomly. For example, at my college, there's a small questionnaire asking if you smoke, mind smokers, or if you want to be in a specified dorm (as in, one for business majors, another for engineering, etc.) Other colleges will ask many, many things and try to pair up students based on interests and habits. It usually depends on the size of the school, and many will post this on their site.</p>
<p>My best suggestion (though I recommend you wait to see another person's answer on this part) is to email residential living and ask if there's a way to be more specific with your roommate and explain your worries. If they can't do anything, you'll probably be stuck with someone, and it may help to establish your worries with them.</p>
<p>RA's in the dorms can help with big problems. If your only problem is that your roommate is messier than you, you probably won't get a dorm change; if there's a serious problem and you two can't room together at all, you may get lucky.</p>
<p>That's as far as I know, again, but good luck with it!!</p>
<p>Likely, if you have made it to college with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder), you have a very mild case of it. That being said, you're going to want to let RezLife know there could be an issue and ask them to to do their best to pair you with someone they suspect (based on the survey) will be able and willing to handle a roomie with ASD. They may also have other resources they can connect you with from the get-go to help you and your future roommate get along well. Additionally, since you are obviously high-functioning ASD, you should do your best to get to know your behaviors and try to learn coping skills to avoid alienating your roommate. If you tend to have escape behaviors, for example, you might try and ween yourself off them. Also, be intentional from the beginning about initiating with your roommate. Build a relationship with her (but don't force it). Show interest in her and less in physics if you can and that may help to alleviate some of the possible roommate issues related to the ASD.</p>
<p>Also, from your original post, I wonder if it would be possible for you to widen your interests a bit. It is unlikely you're going to get a roommate with those exact interests and they may turn her off. In my experience with ASD individuals (as a therapist), many are more focused on their specific things than on other people. If you can direct some of your interests toward her interests, you are likely to have a much better roommate relationship (as well as friendships with your other peers in college). The more you can take the focus off yourself, the better off you will likely be.</p>
<p>I don't wish to come off as cruel, but if you know that you are going to be difficult to live with, I would strongly suggest living alone. The person my older brother is rooming with this year was randomly placed with an autistic roommate last year, and although you may have entirely different personality issues, the autistic roommate unintentionally made life a living hell for the other guy. There were some severe hygiene issues, and a lack of social skills which essentially drove the one roommate, out of frustration and misplaced anger, to harass the autistic roommate for the entire school year. There are a lot of tolerant people in the world, but there is a difference between tolerating personality quirks and having to tolerate autistic behaviors. So, to conclude, if you have any real trouble living with other people, please get a single room. You may be very high functioning, but the description you gave of your behaviors makes me think you may be ill-equipped to live with someone else. Good luck with whatever decision you make.</p>
<p>I agree with ambiguity because it could cause stressful situations for both you and your possible roommate, unless you email the Administration letting them know of your possible rooming issues. Most colleges do send out a questionaire to match you with someone who could be a good fit to live with you.</p>
<p>Just to let everyone know, I'm not difficult to live with. It will just take extra effort for my roommate to get used to my differences. I'm willing to put as much effort as they do. I have very good hygiene, I'm approachable, and I have good social skills when a situation calls for it. I'm more worried about the other roommate accepting me than my inability to share a room. I just don't want someone judging me. I want them to see me as the person I am; not the stigma of a diagnosis.</p>
<p>Then make sure to let RezLife know of the situation. I would avoid mentioning it to your roommate when you first meet, though, if possible, because telling your roommate you have autism may create prejudice (subconsciously) that would cause them to notice and pay more attention to minor quirks in behavior. Also, you might ask your parents their thoughts on you living w a roommate. Would they want to share a room with you if they were in college?</p>
<p>I don't have autism and I already know I'll be hard to live with because I have quirky behavoirs as well, we all do, autistic or not we all have rooming issues and I'm sure you'll be paired with a great person! Unfortunately some people will be uncomfortable knowing you are autistic maybe not telling as apumic suggested would be a good idea. As long as you negiotiate and you seem like a friendly and nice person, so maybe just have the Rezlife have a heads up on your situation.
Best of luck with finding roommate!</p>
<p>You may want to consider a single room. My friend's Aspie son is attending a pre-college program---living in a dorm, attending classes, and participating in social activities. Most of the students live in single rooms within the dorm. Sharing a living space for many of these kids is very difficult. Compromise is not easy for Aspie kids. They tend to be set in their ways and disrupting their routines and behaviors causes them stress. </p>
<p>The positives of living in a single: quiet room, go to bed and wake up when you want to, no dealing with kids partying in your room and sitting on your bed and touching your stuff, privacy, and you can study in your room without distractions rather than having to study in the library. </p>
<p>Have you ever shared a room with someone before? How well are you able to adapt to new situations and social environments? Talk with your parents and with the housing director. They will guide you and help to find the most appropriate and comfortable living arrangement for you.</p>
<p>Robogirl, I am glad to hear that you are optimistic. I have to disagree with the previous posters in asserting that it may be better to not tell the potential roommate that you are autistic. I believe most people would be frightened to be living with a stranger who exhibits rather abnormal behavior, and I think giving a reason for your behavior would put the potential roommate more at ease. Perhaps providing an explanation of what you do and why you do it would be best. The initial awkwardness is probably unavoidable, as a reasonable person is going to be unsettled by your behavior regardless of whether or not you explain it. As before, good luck in your situation.</p>