<p>I just got back from treating myself to a solo lunch at Panera. I love eavesdropping on conversations around me.</p>
<p>and I just heard a doozy.</p>
<p>A girl was just back from her first semester at our large flagship university. She was obviously upset--on the last day of the semester, her roommate had dropped the bombshell of telling her that she had arranged to move out and room with someone else the next semester. The girl at Panera wanted her mom to help her block the other girl's move out of the room. Not wanting to have a random person move in to the room, I can understand--although the original roommate pairings were random I think. But the girl (and her mom apparently--they were writing a "script" for the call the mom was going to make to the housing office)--but in all my years here on CC, and all the problems we have had here with people wanting their roommates moved out/ or to move rooms themselves--this is the first time I have ever heard of someone wanting to block their roomie from moving into another room.</p>
<p>That’s an interesting scenario. How sad that neither the daughter or the mother understand that the roommate has already made her decision.
It would not be easy to work in a housing office!</p>
<p>I feel bad for the gal at Panera but she needs to learn that she can only control herself and no one else. Learning that at 18 or 19 (since she didn’t learn it earlier) will save her a lot of stress later on in life. I think it’s pretty bad that her mom wasn’t explaining that to her but, instead, trying to help her manipulate the situation in her favor.</p>
<p>I can imagine why the roommate was moving out if everything had to go the way of the gal at Panera. I would love to overhear the lunch conversation of the girl moving out LOL.</p>
<p>If it’s U housing, she will probably get some random person next term–perhaps a new student or a transfer. It would be tough for housing to block this, I would think. It’s unfortunate that there was so little communication between Panera gal and room mate.</p>
<p>Lack of communication is not necessarily the reason for the move- I had several nice roommates in college I merely shared space with and it worked out fine. My first freshman roommate announced she wanted her first choice dorm and was on the waiting list for it, it was a blessing when she was able to move soon thereafter (I was in my first choice).</p>
<p>Good for the former roomie- she took advantage of the ability to move in with a friend at a good time to do it. Panera student/mom need a reality check. It would be interesting to find out how she fares with her second year housing- single room/apt or another poor random roommate seems in the works as I doubt she’ll find a willing roommate.</p>
<p>Son had two roommates his freshman year- the first did a semester “abroad” (at a Utah school with skiing as the main objective, with transferable credits) and the second was a transfer who spent most of his time at his girlfriend’s apartment. Strange for son who turned 17 the fall of freshman year- didn’t even have a typical first year of college. He couldn’t move to an apartment second year (underage- apartment managers would not allow it even if we did, we did not) but did room with someone he knew (most returning students went to apartments instead of dorms there).</p>
<p>OK, let’s think this through. Let’s say girl and mother are successful, and roommate can’t move. Can you imagine what the next semester would look like, with a roommate who doesn’t want to be there? And what if roommate finds out girl and mother orchestrated it?? Not exactly my recipe for a successful semester.</p>
<p>Agree–people who are in a living situation because thwarted by the person they are living with can be ‘unpleasant’ at best and the semester can be VERY long–much longer than if they were with a civil, random room mate.</p>
<p>I just thought that this was one of the strangest conversations I have ever overheard, for all of the reasons brought up here. Obviously I don’t know any of the people involved or any of the backstory, if there is one.</p>
<p>But it did seem like a twist on the usual situation where one roomie wants to force the other one to move.</p>
<p>This was an odd conversation. What’s the big connection to the roomate? It doesn’t sound like they were best friends or anything. It seems they only knew each other for semester (3 months). Can you really grow that attached to someone in that short period of time? I don’t think so.</p>
<p>I take it you havent seen movies like Single White Female and Fatal Attraction?? </p>
<p>manipulative controll freaks don’t really need to have genuine relationships with people in order to deserve the right to control their every move. it takes a certain special someone to coerce a stranger into being their college roommate. </p>
<p>the factthat her mom is helping her isn’t even the sickest part!!!</p>
<p>Also, even if she doesn’t feel stalker-ish about her, the roomie might be an easygoing, easy to live with type, and Panera girl might not want to trade that for the unknown. Or, maybe she feels that a roommate moving out on her makes her look bad, so she doesn’t want it on that account. I imagine there’s lots of weird motivations that could go on in the head of someone making that call.</p>