<p>I know I've posted a rambling thread about my roommate before, but he's really ****ing me off and I'm questionable about the situation.</p>
<p>He was only my roommate for this semester. Our room was MINE last semester as he didn't even go to our school. Anyways, over the course of this semester I bought some items for our dorm room including:</p>
<ul>
<li>A new lamp, because the one I had broke</li>
<li>A rug</li>
<li>Three fans and a space heater</li>
<li>an iPod Dock</li>
<li>An extra chair</li>
</ul>
<p>So now we have two weeks left until we move out. The other week he asked me something like "hey man, am I gonna have to pay you to keep the iPod dock?" I was like "Uhhh well I kind of bought it and intended on keeping it myself" and his only argument was that he spent more time in the room than me and used it more than me and that it wouldn't be economical for me to keep it.
Then on Friday, he pulled his car up to the door by our building and when I was coming back from class I saw him loading the space heater into his van. I asked him what he was doing and he said "just clearing up some space to make move-out easier." I asked if he was planning to bring the space heater back in and he said "probably not considering you never use it." I just continued walking and when I got to the room, the rug and my chair were gone. I waited for him to get back upstairs, and when he did I asked what he'd done and he said he was packing his third round of stuff to bring home.
I made it clear to him that the chair was ** mine ** and pretty expensive from Target and that he had to bring it back. He didn't like the idea and told me it'd be pointless for me to keep it because I again "never use it" and it wouldn't be worth the trouble of bringing it back. Which is 100% untrue.
So, he said that when he brought the last round of stuff home that afternoon, he'd bring my chair back. Of course he didn't and when I accused him of stealing it he started crying and told me that I've been a really mean roommate and that he's sorry for his problem and that he can't help himself or what not. It was awkward and I apologized and told him to keep the chair. As soon as I let him have the chair, the crying stopped and he was himself again. This morning he was making weird comments like "that lamp is going to look so cool in my bedroom" and I was just ignoring him. But obviously he's hinting to me that he wants it, and he's probably going to pull the crying trick again because he knows that I'm a push-over.</p>
<p>I'm not sure what's going on but I feel like I'm totally getting ripped off. What should I do?</p>
<p>You paid for it, it’s obviously yours. I don’t know why your roommate feels like he’s entitled to your stuff that you paid for, just because he thinks you don’t use it much. Get someone with an authority position involved (such as an RA) and explain that your roommate is taking things that aren’t his to begin with, and back it up with receipts or something to show that YOU purchased those items, not him.</p>
<p>You paid for it, it’s yours. You need to be more assertive and quit letting this guy manipulate you. After the whole issue with the church kids, do you really want him to have all of your stuff, too??</p>
<p>If your roommate took your wallet, what would you do? If he went over to your house and robbed the place at gunpoint, what would you do? </p>
<p>He’s stealing. There’s no ambiguity here. He has no right to use your things and he has no right to take them home with him now that he’s moving out. Contact the school authorities and consider pressing charges. He’s literally robbing you and there is no particular reason to keep giving him 3rd 4th and 5th chances to bring your stuff back; I suspect what he’s trying to do here is to “run out the clock” by giving you excuses and whining until after you and he separate, knowing that you probably won’t hunt him down after the two of you are back home over the summer.</p>
<p>Tell an ra or the police. Either this guy is a jerk or he’s a kleptomaniac, and if he’s the second he needs to get help. Either way he’s taking advantage of you and no one should be treated that way</p>
<p>You have to get your stuff back. The guy’s an obvious moocher/thief and he’s walking all over you. If you can’t get your chair back, at least put your foot down and don’t yield another inch, otherwise he’s going to think everything you own is fair game.</p>
<p>Don’t ignore his ramblings to himself. Tell him on his face that the stuff is yours as you paid for it. Also tell him that you WILL REPORT HIM TO THE RA/POLICE if he doesn’t stop his kleptomaniacal tendencies.</p>
<p>If you didn’t authorize him to have the stuff, it’s theft. If you pay for it, it’s yours; it doesn’t matter whether or not you use it.</p>
<p>Get the RA involved and threaten to file a police report if he doesn’t return with the stuff. More so, it’s actually larceny if he deprived you of the property without your permission (i.e. moving it without your permission). That’s already a crime.</p>
<p>Just remember: follow through with the police if he doesn’t shape up. He needs to learn that this is not OK, and holding people accountable include actions that appear extreme. The possibility of a criminal record is definitely one of those.</p>
<p>You can’t allow yourself to be moved by tears. If you are a sucker for that you are going to have issues with a lot more people because many will use tears as a weapon. It sounds silly but is true. A lot of people are so disturbed by another persons tears that they will immediately give in to whatever they think will make the display of embarrassing emotion stop.</p>
<p>The fact is-the guy is taking your stuff. That is stealing, in case you didn’t know. He is using his ability to cry on demand to get his way and your stuff. You need to do something about it, and do it now.</p>
<p>I agree with other posters about reporting him. You have been victimized by this guy and he is going to do the same thing to someone else if you don’t put a stop to it. You need to think about it logically: anything that you bought is yours. Anything that he bought is his. That is pretty simple. The way that he just took the stuff when you weren’t there means that he was really going to steal it and try to get away with it. That is Not OK!</p>
<p>Sack up, and get your stuff back. Tell him to stop crying and return your items, or you’re going to the RA and filing a police report.</p>
<p>Him crying is either because he’s trying to manipulate you or because he’s mentally weak. Either way, it’s pathetic. Stand up, and don’t be pushed over.</p>
<p>Tell the RA and/or the cops. If you do report it to the cops feel free to… embellish the value of your stuff a little. Don’t get wild but if the total value of all the stolen goods is $480… just push it up to $500 so that he then gets slapped with felony theft ;)</p>
<p>Can you prove you own the stuff? If you can, you definitely have to tell him you want it back immediately or are filing charges with the police. He is seriously screwed up if he thinks using things more means he has more right to it. He’s counting on you being a push-over to take what he wants. Grow some, and get your stuff back.</p>
<p>Honestly, I’d probably punch him…but then again, with me, i’d never have let the situation get to this point. </p>
<p>Calling the police if he continues to refuse to bring your stuff back might (?) be a better idea but do it right away, the closer it is to graduating the less likely it will be to get your stuff back. And it doesnt matter if you have proof that the stuff was yours, your threat to call and/or the police coming will likely be enough to get your roommate to cooperate. </p>
<p>And by the way, you ARE a pushover. You caught him loading his van with your stuff and let him drive away. It’s possible that you are so much of a pushover that he has no idea that you care so much. Let him know how you feel - you may be being much less forceful than you feel because you hate confrontation so much. Problem with that is many people are thick and your politeness wont help.</p>
<p>Did you get your stuff back? Seriously, you should have just gone to the van and taken your stuff back and told him if everything was not returned you’d be filing a report. He thought he could get away with it. You have to stand up for yourself.</p>