<p>Drove D back to school today and was as teary as I' d been when we dropped her off in the fall. It's been a real dichotomy-when she was home, the noise levels (which we'd missed) and jokes increased when she was around, which I enjoyed. However, she worked a lot (which she needed to do, since she blew through too much of her spending $$ fall semester) and spent lots of time going out with HS friends. I felt sad that I did not see much of her the last couple of weeks she was home. She also broke up with her boyfriend 2 days ago-who we adore and has been like part of the family for over a year-so I feel like I've "lost" 2 kids. Anyone else feel sad as their college freshman heads back?</p>
<p>A little sad for us; the house is empty. There was a lot of partying while he was here and we did not see that much of him, like your daughter.</p>
<p>I was sadder when my daughter went back to school yesterday than when I left her at college last fall. I guess I was so excited for her in September that it tempered the sad feelings. After a month at home over break, I got used to seeing her smiling face every day and I miss her terribly already!</p>
<p>Speaking of sadness - my heartfelt sympathy to any family and friends of the two Gonzaga students killed in the Utah avalanche. May God bless you.</p>
<p>I think the cold and the lack of sunshine also has something to do with the sadness for me. This is the least likeable season for me; I don't like clearing the snow either. Waiting for spring break now..</p>
<p>Moodle, is your D by any chance taking that four-day 1-credit J-term Intellectual Inquiry class? I dropped mine at the airport yesterday at 6am and there's a bit of a "hole" here as well. 3-1/2 weeks was pushing the limits of "special", all interspliced with Christmas and New Year's, in terms of one entertainment after another instead of just the routine of being home. The past week alone saw an aunt & uncle, her orchestra director, and our pastor come over for dinner and all of us taking her ballet teacher to lunch. TheMom said that she couldn't stand another week of social whirl.</p>
<p>Otoh, while she was here, D agreed to do a summer job for the first 6-7 weeks of college back at college...her summer home will be shorter than we anticipated.</p>
<p>Btw, Moodle, mine's trip back was not without incident: plane diverted into Providence because of weather. The combo of weather and two-hour delay made her classmate's mother, who was supposed to pick her up, reluctant to come into Logan, so D had to take a $50 cab ride out to Newton, from where she and classmate will get to Smith today.</p>
<p>But as to Bxian's original question, yes, there is a sad hole in existence here. Though not as bad as at drop-off, I confess.</p>
<p>I cried (in front of her friends, no less) when my daughter went back to college when she was a freshman. This year we parted ways at the New Orleans airport after a family vacation when my sons, husband and I were to fly back to PA and she to IL. I felt just a little sad, but have not had any huge rolls of angst like I did the first year.</p>
<p>Friends had told me it would get better and it has.</p>
<p>No sadness here--but it won't be dark until 10 pm :).</p>
<p>Three and a half weeks is ten days too long. For him and for us. </p>
<p>His overseas flight was delayed thirty minutes and he missed all of his connections across the country. He had to wait 6 hours for a red-eye flight which no doubt exacerbated the jet-lag and Last-Night-Out-With-the-Blokes hangover (drinking age is 18 here). </p>
<p>The good news is that his mileage bumped him up to gold card level--ie free lounge access.</p>
<p>And as soon as I hit "Post" the phone rang and it was D checking in. She was getting out of the cab at her dorm when she encountered a lost prospective student & father and wound up giving them a tour of the house, dinner, and collecting six other helpful students to give opinions along the way.</p>
<p>Bxian--sad here too after sending D back to school. She too had a breakup, and I'll miss the boy. It's hard to send them back when they are sad. I have to hope that she'll regroup quickly once she gets back into the whirl of college life. Hope your D isn't too upset by her breakup. This sure is a time of change and growth for these kids. I didn't look at it that way when I was in college, but the view from the parental cheap seats is quite different!</p>
<p>I had been anticipating her departure for a few days before Sat morning. D was more than ready. With 3 children, H & I had to split up...D2 & I drove her to LAX. The drop off lanes were crowded, so there was not much time to be sad. Her sister helped pull her suitcases out of the trunk...all I heard was, "Mom, I'll call when I get back to the dorm! Bye!!!" And, she was off! Another Ford landed before her, so the 2 hooked up at Philly Intl and took a cab back to campus. Our phone conversation lasted a whole 60 seconds since she was eager to check in with her friends...such is life. ;)</p>
<p>The last night -- when he was out with friends till three, though he had not packed and had to get up before eight -- I lay awake and remembered why it is good for kids to be living at college rather than home.:)</p>
<p>However, I feel a real sadness because I realize how easily he slipped back into the house, his room, our life, and that there may only be one or two more visits in which that is true. He is establishing his life elsewhere, and he will begin to feel more like a visitor with each return.</p>
<p>This was brought home to me when he and I and my daughter went out to dinner and, during conversation about a relative who may come visit, my 24-year-old daughter said: "Will she be staying at your house?" The three of us were suddenly silent, until I commented that "your house" sounded really strange coming from my daughter, who grew up in this house. She said it sounded really strange to her, too, but she needed a way to distinguish it from her own house now. We settled on: "The house." It won't be long before it is "the house" rather than "my house" for my son, as well.</p>
<p>I think what got me was that when D was around, she seemed to appreciate us more and was very affectionate-but her time at home also made me realize that she has to start making her own life as a young adult (which she is eager to do). The director of student life at her school told us at orientation that freshman often go through a period of trying out "new" identities to see what fits. That is precisely what D seems to be doing-over break, she decided that she would no longer continue with an activity that she pursued avidly first semester (a sport)-it took up so much time that she had no time left for other interests that she wanted to explore-so as much as she enjoyed the camraderie that came with being part of a team, she has decided to quit after much soul-searching. The boyfriend break-up also came after much soul-searching-she decided that she was spending too much energy pining for him (he is 4 hours away) at the expense of forming friendships at school. She seems to be handling the breakup OK so far (it's only been 2 days). It's me that is having a tough time. Her BF treated me like his second Mom-he calls us from school just to say hi and always calls to tell us that his flight got in OK when he flies back to school after a visit home. He is one of the kindest kids you would ever want to meet. I am hoping they will be able to maintain their "best friendship" (which is how they started even before dating).</p>
<p>Finite visits for finite amounts of time.</p>
<p>I think I'm okay with that....</p>
<p>Only sad for the few hours she was enroute. The minute she got back she posted an IM away message (which was not directed to the bereft loved ones she just left): Yeaaaaaaaaaaaa - I"M BACK!" I'm still smiling knowing she's so happy there.</p>
<p>My D gets back from India Wed. morning and leaves to go back to school Sat night. I have not gotten to see much of her though dad has since they were in India together. I spoke to her a few days ago and she did not want to leave the work she has been doing there and is now planning to return for most the summer. I am only somewhat ready for her to be one her own but I guess it is better than the alternative. We did raise her to be independant. She is coming home for spring break so I am looking forward to real visit then. I think getting back to school will be aome what difficult for her, including the weather, I believe it was snowing today in Northampton.</p>
<p>On the last day of vacation, my freshman daughter said: "I'm so excited to be going back to school." My main response was to be happy and grateful that things were working out so well for her there; my heart goes out to the parents whose kids are struggling in college. But a small part of me was also sad--because I'll miss her, because college is so much more exciting than home (as it sure was for me back in the day), because I can see the day coming when this won't feel like home to her anymore.</p>
<p>Sac, fwiw, my D wasn't up until 3am and not having packed but she <em>did</em> place downloading songs from my CD's onto her Ipod as a priority ahead of packing. At 10pm I looked at the pile of stuff strewn about her room and thought, "She'll never get packed in time." Fortunately, that was a thought of the rhetorical sort.</p>
<p>Yes-- lots of mixed feelings dropping s. off at the airport. We are so thrilled that he is having such a great time at college. He reiterates that he couldn't be happier. And having him home for almost a month was just long enough to get used to having him there.. only to have to say goodbye again. He, too, postponed packing until the wee hours of the night before he left, but we awakened to the bags packed and lined up by the door. Today I get to mail the few things he left behind.. glad to see we aren't totally useless ...</p>
<p>jym,</p>
<p>Your story reminded me of ours. Son's flight left a week ago at 7:00am. He left the house with Dad to go to the airport at 5:00am. I asked him if he had everything. The essentials: ipod & charger, cell phone & charger, wallet & tickets. His bags looked a bit light, but he reassured me that he was all set. After they left, I looked in his room. He forgot to pack most of the clean clothes ! Duh.............</p>
<p>(Needless to say, his package should be arriving to him later this week.)</p>