Score for this essay...

<p>Prompt: Does questioning authority make a society stronger?</p>

<p>Defiance is part of everybody's nature. We question whether something right or wrong based on our own opinions. So why do we question authority? We do it so that we can make our society stronger. There are evident examples of this from the present, as well as the past.</p>

<p>One common example of questioning authority is in our homes. Imagine this: we're watching TV on the couch, with the remote in our hands, when suddenly, our dads pop out of no where and take the remote away in order to flip to Food Network. Won't we get up and get in an argument about how we were there first, and how it's not fair? Yes, and we do it because we don't like being oppressed, especially by our own parents. By questioning our parents, we don't feel as beleaguered, and therefore, make ourselves stronger against oppression.</p>

<p>Another example that's from the past took place during the 18th century. For many years, the French peasants had been maltreated by King Louis XVI. While the king was living luxuriously with the nobility inside the Palace of Versailles, poor French citizens were starving to death. After the peasants could tolerate it no further, they stormed into the palace and captured the royal family, forcing them to move back to Paris. Though this defiance of authority led to one of the bloodiest revolutions in history (the French Revolution), this showed the citizens' potentials of overthrowing the throne, and strengthened their society.</p>

<p>Finally, the strongest evidence which illuminates that defying authority can strengthen society is the American Revolution. Great Britain had taxed the colonies unfairly, and soldiers were quartered in the colonists' homes. The Americans could not condone it and longer, and so the American Revolution began. They dumped teas in the ocean, and they kicked soldiers out of their homes. Such acts of questioning the authority sparked up a sense of unity among the colonists. After having spent most of their lives under the rule of a tyrant, they finally decided to revolt against their mother nation. By doing so, the colonists were able to establish one of the strongest nations in world history.</p>

<p>Yes, questioning authority makes society stronger. If we we weren't able to question society, everyone would be servile under their parents, and the two remarkable revolutions would have never happened.</p>

<p>You didn't answer the prompt. You worked around it.</p>

<p>body paragraph 1: What does this have to do with society? Nothing.</p>

<p>body paragraph 2: Questioning authority is not the same as defying authority and killing the king. Questioning authority is when you look at something an authority says, and think about it. For example, Martin Luther questioned authority. And you never talked about how French society was strengthened as a result of the French Revolution. You just summarized what happened in the French Revolution, and in the last sentence you briefly said, "this...strengthened their society." Well, how was it strengthened? You never answered that. How, then, are we to believe that society was strengthened?</p>

<p>body paragraph 3: To say that "the strongest evidence which illuminates that defying authority..." requires another essay. Don't make claims that are not backed up. It would have been wiser to say "another strong piece of evidence" rather than the strongest. The last sentence of this paragraph shows a rather twisted view of history: "By [revolting against their mother nation], the colonists were able to establish one of the strongest nations in world history." Yes, the U.S. became strong because they revolted! And again, you give no proof. You talked about what led to the American Revolution and what they did to spark revolution (dumped tea, kicked soldiers out) but you gave no proof that society became strengthened. You could argue that society was not strengthened. For example, right after the U.S. gained independence, there was a big migration of pro-British colonists, who were harassed and publicly humiliated to such an extent that they fled to Canada. There was no real central structure after the Revolution; the Articles of Confederation was largely a failure. How, then, was society stronger? You never answered that!!</p>