second semester difficulties

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>so I see from looking through the internet and all that that people like me do exist -- into my second semester of college without friends, mostly stuck in my room and not going out. my case might be a little more extreme than others, because I literally don't have anyone to hangout with. I don't have anyone I can call up to go to dinner with except my high school friends in the area. my only friends are my roommates, who thank god I am fine with, but theyre busy with their own friends so I don't often go out with them. I try to go to breakfast super early when not many people are there, so I can eat by myself in peace without feeling extremely awkward. for the most part, I haven't had issues like this ever. I don't remember ever having to TRY making friends in high school, because it seems like something that just happened, who knows how. ALTHOUGH, I remember going to a couple of summer camps when I was younger, and having trouble making friends. In all this, I'm saying I was never good at making friends, bad at it even.</p>

<p>NO, I don't feel suicidal or severely depressed. I'm quite independent and do enjoy time by myself. In my spare time I've explored the area and have even gone to movies by myself, and as sad as that may sound, its okay with me. Taking walks and listening to music really helps me. Still, alone time is great and all, but like any human being I really need a good friend or two to hang out with. Acquaintances in general. </p>

<p>People at my school are very outgoing and I on the other hand am simply awkward by nature and dislike the whole process of "making friends" because it wears me out mentally. I'm okay with introducing myself, and maybe I'll really squeeze my brain out for a comment, and thats usually the end of the conversation. I just go blank. with the friends that I have outside the college, though, I talk SO MUCH, so I do have things to say. I'm just not good at or am into conversational language. The semester's just begun, and I'm still seeing how it goes, and I'll keep in mind having to take initiative when in classes and clubs -- because those are my only contacts, really -- but is there any other advice someone can offer me? </p>

<p>thanks in advance.
pardon my long message, and the wordiness</p>

2

<p>Well, most people are going to tell you the standard answer–join clubs, talk to people after class, etc. While those are all good ideas, if you’re really talkative with your friends but not so much with strangers, that’s probably because you don’t feel comfortable opening up to someone that you don’t know very well or trust, etc. while you love to have relationships with people that you are comfortable with. So maybe you should focus on overcoming that initial uncomfortableness with a stranger in the beginning and try to establish trust and knowledge of each other. Hopefully, that’ll open up new people to share your life with.</p>

3

<p>You’ll get used to it. I’m in my second year now and I still only have one real friend at school. The rest of the people I know are guys I talk with during class and that’s it. I tried the club thing, but I wasn’t really interested in any of them, and the few that I did try didn’t net me any new friends.</p>

<p>I’m with you though. I don’t feel like I tried to make friends at all in high school and I ended up having a huge group of friends. Now in college I’ve been trying to make friends like crazy and I end up with one. Awesome.</p>