<p>Separation anxiety when a child enters college has been discussed on CC, but I haven't noticed (at least not recently) what parents are experiencing or what they plan to do after the last child graduates from college. H and I have been involved in both kids' schools and now that D is about to start her senior year, I've realized that there are going to be some "last"s this year and that we won't be affiliated with any school after this. It's become such a part of our lives that it'll be strange not to have to deal with that anymore.</p>
<p>For us, it'll be somewhat of a relief to have the luxury of scheduling our vacations around seemingly random dates vs. events such as family weekend, dance concert, academic calendars. And of course, not having to write out that tuition check will be a great asset!!! :) But I have the sense that I'll be weaning myself from all things collegiate as the year progresses. The upside is that I can spend time doing something different, I guess.</p>
<p>How are others who are in the same situation feeling? Relieved? Ecstatic? Anxious?</p>
<p>I'm not quite there yet - have two "only children" ;) (six years apart). D graduated from college in '06 and S takes off for his first year in college today.</p>
<p>But I do feel the empty nest approaching and hope to use my expanded personal time allowance to ramp up my own social life with my girlfriends - will be planning some lunches, occasionally doing a weeknight dinner and movie, etc.</p>
<p>With "one less man to pick up after" I also look forward to taking the house to a higher level of organization.</p>
<p>H is actually more sentimental about this passage than I am -- perhaps because he has fewer social involvements so for him family life is "it." We do look forward to taking some "off-peak" couple only vacations now that we will be more free from the academic schedule.</p>
<p>Separation anxiety when a child enters college has been discussed on CC, but I haven't noticed (at least not recently) what parents are experiencing or what they plan to do after the last child graduates from college.>>></p>
<p>Start planning weddings? LOL, just kidding.</p>
<p>Oh, Carolyn, talk about shivers going up my spine! :P Both kids are in pretty serious relationships . . . so, who knows - you could be right on the mark.</p>
<p>What a timely thread. I have also been feeling a lot of anxiety of the same sort lately.
My older son just graduated from college in June. 2nd son just went off to college last year. They were fortunate enough to be able to attend colleges that are a good fit and highly regarded. At first when the 2nd son finally left for college, my wife and I really enjoyed the new-found freedom of empty-nester. We were enjoying the satisfaction of " a job well done" and the feeling of relief after seeing both of them having gone off to colleges that, by all accounts, would offer them "a leg up on their careers".
However, lately, even though older son is gamefully employed and is enjoying a job that he likes and has the conventional prestige that goes along with it. I have found that I have become increasingly anxious about how well and soon he can achieve his future careers successes. And worried about whether 2nd son can equal his older brother's achievements because I have always tried to be unbiased and want the both of them to be equal in everything.
Is this a common neurosis of our generation of overly involved baby-boomers parents, or is it just me?</p>
<p>bioeng I know a family with two boys and the parents feel the same way as you do. Both boys have graduated college and have wonderful jobs. The younger one seems happy enough, but the older one is so miserable it breaks my heart. He is in his late twenties and longs to be a teacher and live in our small town. He's in a large city, had several promotions, and makes mega bucks, but would give it all up in a heartbeat if his parents wouldn't be devastated by it. I have never believed kids should be equal, they are all so different and should be treated as individuals even within families. Just be open to your kids dreams as well as what you belive will make them happy. No offence intended you sound like a very loving proud parent just a cautionary tale. OP we have three college years left and although I love being a Mom can't wait to buy an RV and travel to "boring" places with my husband.</p>
<p>Hmmm, I find I do not miss the high school at all, though I miss seeing some of the people there. My husband and I are looking forward to our empty nest even though we will miss our kids terribly. One way to stay involved is if your school has a foundation that supports it. Many of the people who volunteer for our HS foundation are past parents who like to help the community by raising money for the HS. One grandmother I know helps in the library at the beginning and end of every school year. She hasn't had any relatives attending for years.</p>
<p>There may be twinges of sadness, but I cannot wait. With my 5 spanning so many years, our lives have centered around them, as it should have been, but I have been in this mode for a while. </p>
<p>However, don't figure on doing the cartwheels just yet. Many kids come back home. Our area is so expensive that our oldest has lived with us for some years, just recently moving out of town to a more affordable area. What a pain having a young adult in the house who is used to living by his own rules with no consideration of others! Also many of us who have taken out loans to pay for college are going to still be paying long after the kid graduates, so it is not necessarily a quick severance of the financial cord, especially as many kids are taking low or no pay internships or still have financial needs. They can live in your check book for a loooong time. I don't see retirement in my husband's near future. It is truly a time to celebrate when the kids are definitely free and clear.</p>