<p>Hey guys..
I'm an international student and I don't really know if I can be very personal in my essay. I have included an anecdote and I have never opened up to anyone about it before ( except my best friend ) and it kind of defines my "identity".
And the essay is also not "gender-neutral".
Serious help needed!!
Thank you! :)</p>
<p>And who should I give my essay for editing? 
Well the incident happened when I was a little girl and it turned me into a feminist…
If I do not use suitable words to describe the event it would look like I’m asking for sympathy or I’m self-pitying (The incident is a big deal… I went for a walk in the morning searching for my grandmother and there is guy running behind me- such things usually happen in India- but since it happened when I was little, it had an everlasting impact on me. Whoaa I’m being personal 
Should I post my essay here so that you guys can review it?
Good to be completely anonymous here 
</p>
<p>Do not post it here and do not share it with other students on CC. It is a personal statement, so it is supposed to be personal. It is fine to write about a defining moment for you, but as you said, stay away from self pity or sympathy seeking. You don’t need to use big words, just try to let your own voice come through. It is an opportunity for adcoms to get to know you better. You may want to ask some adult frequent posters to review your essays (not me), and maybe your teachers.</p>
<p>Thank you!. So it’s okay if my essay is only about feminism??</p>