Should I go to the same college as my twin brother?

<p>Hey!</p>

<p>I'm not sure if this is the right section to put this in but I hope you can help me anyways.</p>

<p>So I am currently a junior in high school and am starting to think about college.</p>

<p>What this post is about is whether I should go to the same college as my brother. I have an identical twin brother and we are going to college in about a year and half.</p>

<p>My parents are always saying that wouldn't I rather be roommates with my brother than some person I don't even know?</p>

<p>But my brother and I are always fighting. I find him annoying a lot of the times and we just don't really get along.</p>

<p>I was hoping that you guys could give your advice. If you are a twin, I'd love it if you could share what you did and whether you went to the same college as your sibling?</p>

<p>Thanks!!</p>

<p>Not a twin, but chiming in anyways.</p>

<p>Don’t base something as important as your education solely on what another person is doing. That includes boyfriends, girlfriends, and siblings. If you and your brother fall in love with the same campus and you both want to go there, great, go to the same school. But if you’re drawn to different schools, there’s nothing wrong with that either. But take your brother out of the equation when you’re deciding which campus is the best choice for you.</p>

<p>As for rooming together… it sounds like you don’t want to, and it doesn’t sound like you really get along that well. So you might be happier if you go for a random roommate, it’ll mean making a new friend, and it’ll push you to try new things and meet new people rather than hanging out with your brother all the time. You can still hang out of course, but if it’s a large campus and you don’t live together you’ll rarely see each other around campus unless it’s planned.</p>

<p>So… I’d say forget you have a twin for the duration of the admissions process.</p>

<p>I agree with the above poster. Go to the school that you would want to go to as if you didn’t have a twin. You’re your own person, not just one half of a set of twins. Don’t avoid a school just because your twin wants to go there, but don’t go to a school just because your twin is going there.</p>

<p>That being said, if you do go to the same school as your brother, I would recommend rooming with someone besides your brother. It’s like how people often recommend that friends don’t room together. It’s good to meet new people and expand your horizons. You can still spend as much or as little time with your brother as you want to without rooming with him. Maybe if you tell your parents that even if you do go to the same school, you want to meet new people and room with someone else. Your parents may want you to go to the same school because moving you both in will be much easier if you go to the same school, which is something to consider. If you both go to different schools, you may have a lot of conflicting dates–move in, move out, graduation, etc–which is a valid concern. But I still don’t think you should base the entire decision around the logistics. That kind of stuff always works out in the end.</p>

<p>j</p>

<p>I agree with the above. Make your decisions by yourself - if you and your brother love the same school, don’t not go there because he does. But if you want to go to a different school, then do that (if your parents can afford it and are willing to pay).</p>

<p>When I was an RA, I had twin sisters who roomed together on my hall. They got along just fine and rarely fought. I think they roomed together for several years. It all depends on what you want - some colleges won’t let opposite-sex students room together even if you are siblings.</p>

<p>I went to college with twin girls who married twin boys and moved in next door to each other. </p>

<p>Really.</p>

<p>But most twins I know have chosen schools individually and enjoy getting to be seen as individuals, no matter how well they get along with their twin.</p>

<p>I do like the idea of being seen as an individual because we’re pretty much always together and people always pretty much consider us as one person.</p>

<p>It sounds like you’re really looking for some separation from your twin: you fight a lot and you don’t want to be seen as a half a twin-pair. I think some time separate would be really great for developing your own identity. As others have said, choose your school independently of where your brother’s choice. If you do end up at the same school, I’d recommend not rooming together; this is a chance to branch out on your own and develop separate from your twin.</p>

<p>I have an older brother, and when he first went off to college we were still fighting a lot, but after some time apart and maturing, we’re much closer and get along great. I’m guessing and hoping that the same will happen for you and your brother with time.</p>

<p>Out of curiosity how many students attend the schools you’re considering? I roomed with a girl whose older brother (older by just a year) attended the same 900 person liberal arts college as her. Part of her identity on campus was inextricably linked to her brother and vice versa. I’ve known identical twins who attended the same large university and led completely separate lives from one another other than playing in a shared intramural team. </p>

<p>My identical twin brother and I wanted to go to different colleges. It was important to me to establish my own identity and follow my own interests. After 18 years of being seen as a pair, it was nice to be normal. It took a while to figure out life as an individual. </p>

<p>I think being a twin has disadvantages when going to college. You probably haven’t had to work that hard in developing a peer group. You also may not have had many problems with peer pressure. If, like me, you relied on your twin, you always had a companion and really didn’t care much what other people thought. Wherever you go, it will be important to be open and friendly and move out of the twin role.</p>

<p>In retrospect, I wish we had gone to schools which were closer - I was in upstate NY and my brother was in VA - and we didn’t get to see each other as much as we would have liked. I think visiting each other on campus as adults and individuals would have been beneficial in our relationship.</p>

I’m dealing with the same issue. My twin brother and I are polar opposites, but may attend the same school. He’s going to be at UCSB, and is doing it for the parties and area. I’m fighting between UCSD and UCSB. Both schools have similar programs and offered me nice scholarships in the honors program as an incoming freshman. I’m not trying to party but further my education. In high school we have had the same social group and we would always argue. I also always end up tutoring him. I almost want to choose SD to get away from him and make my own social group, but UCSB is amazing. It may have a large population, but the place is small. Is it possible I could really, truly be my own individual there? I’m worried that someone it’s inevitable we will end up with the same friend group. I would have no issue going to UCSD but I can’t seem to find a single person who is passionate about the place and I’m worried I’ll have no social life. Could anybody dispel that rumor? Could I still have a vibrant social life in SD with a controllable amount of partying when I want to, or is it as dead as it sounds?

I have 4 days to SIR, trying to gather as much information as possible before I make my choice

UCSB is an amazing school. I’m sure you’ll end up meeting different groups of friends freshman year by living in different dorms, etc, and can then continue living separately throughout your time at UCSB. I think you’d feel a little bummed each time you visited if you had gone with a second choice. Good luck!

You and your brother will most likely start to get along much better if you don’t room together. So I concur with the advice to not room together, whatever you do!

@edj141 I’m passionate about UCSD and there are tons of other students who are too. As long as you’re willing to socialize, you can easily find parties and make cool friends. (If you’re still worried, just join Greek life, UCSD’s is not as intense as a traditional Greek system but still guarantees parties and girls.) Admittedly these parties and girls won’t be as wild as their SB counterparts. I know a pair of twins who are split between SD and SB, so you guys wouldn’t be the first.

Closing thread. Please start new threads instead of resurrecting ones that are clearly dead. Thanks.