<p>I'm grateful that my life doesn't suck. I'm grateful that my parents are here to help me on apps.</p>
<p>Today I just finished an app for a school, even if I do get accepted into, that I can never attend due to cost. Costed nearly $100 with the fees. I argued that we could never afford tuition, but my parent's philosophy is that it isn't my choice to attend college, the power is in the college to accept me, so I might as well apply everywhere and decide later on.</p>
<p>So, I guess in some situations, is it just appropriate to just give in and avoid a huge conflict? It's not exactly a huge detriment to me to give in. </p>
<p>Communication in a situation like this is key, however I have tried far too many times in far too many ways, and my parent still thinks people on CC are full of lies, that there are hidden meanings behind essay prompts, that I am superhuman, and that admissions officers have secret motives behind things they say.</p>
<p>In Sun Tzu’s The Art of War, he says that when given a choice, there are only two types of battles you should fight: the ones you have already won, and the ones you have to win.</p>
<p>"my parent still thinks people on CC are full of lies, that there are hidden meanings behind essay prompts, that I am superhuman, and that admissions officers have secret motives behind things they say. "
And to they think money grows on trees as well? ? Where do they think the money will “magically” appear from so you can go to a college that is currently unaffordable? Sounds like you need to be the wise “adult” in your family. College is expensive and a student should NOT forced to apply, let alone go somewhere unaffordable because of the wishes of their parents. And what ever you do, do NOT take out thousands of $$ of student loans to make a “dream” come through- They can turn that dream into a nightmare! Student loans will follow you everywhere- they cannot be eliminated even if you have to declare bankruptcy some day[ heaven forbid]</p>
<p>It may be time to have a frank conversation about college money. Pick a time when no one is stressed and just ask them if you could discuss this important aspect of college with them. </p>
<p>Get some accurate numbers about college costs (from the colleges’ websites), and then ask them how much they can/are willing to contribute to your college. If the gap is too great, tell them that you cannot pay the difference yourself and you don’t want to take on a boatload of debt that will take many years to pay off. You certainly owe your parents the respect of listening to them and being guided by their advice if possible. On the other hand, you owe it to yourself to think about your own future. It’s a fine line to walk sometimes. Be your most adult and mature self, and hopefully they will see that they can have a grownup conversation with you about this. Let them know that this subject, as uncomfortable as it may be, cannot be brushed aside. Finances are a very real part of the college decision.</p>
<p>When you have a plan, it IS helpful to apply at many schools so that you can compare packages. What you need to do first is figure out what your family is expected to pay, what they CAN pay, and go from there to find many schools that may offer you need and merit aid. Up to this point, you have done your part earning grades and test scores. Now they need to step up and work with you to figure out costs. The clock is ticking (or may have already ticked away) for several state scholarships. You have already heard from us that too much debt is not worth it. You also have to choice not to accept schools that would put you in too much debt.</p>
<p>Apply anywhere you want or your parents want, BUT make sure that you have at least one “financial safety school” on your list. This is a school that will almost certainly accept you and that your family can afford.</p>
<p>As long as your parents aren’t preventing you from applying to the schools you want (and think you could actually get in and attend), I see no harm in giving in to their desires and applying to more selective/expensive schools. In this particular case, wouldn’t it be great if they are right and you are wrong?</p>
<p>Well it’s nice that your parents believe in you fully and seem to be giving you a lot of support, even if you don’t feel “superhuman” maybe there’s something to what they say. </p>
<p>I think they have a good strategy, as long as you are applying to a mix of schools, some expensive, some affordable, etc. Once you know where you are accepted, you can look at your financial aid offers and see what happens. Some selective/expensive schools will offer more aid if they really want to secure you, and if they don’t, you have other options to look at. </p>
<p>Don’t doubt yourself so much. Your parents may be right.</p>