DS is trying to decide whether he should live in a single or a triple room. He is an incoming freshman. Opinions?
I think freshman are better off rooming with others, unless they have a medical issue that dictates otherwise. Having room mates gives one some immediate buddies (notice I did not say friends). You have someone to go to dinner with, hang with, etc those first few weeks. In a single, you need to reach out to others and make more of an effort.
It depends on the school. Both of kids went to the same school and the school had a lot of singles. I signed them up for singles because it gave them a lot more privacy. Their school was also very cold/snow. They were able to study in their room when it was too cold to go out. They didn’t have any roommate drama. They left the door open when they wanted to socialize and closed it when they wanted privacy. They told me they’ve not answer the door sometimes. Both of my nephews at the same school also had singles.
It depends. Many of today’s students have never shared a room. For some, adjusting to sharing a room on top of adjusting to college is a lot of pressure.
One of my kids had a single as a freshman and loved it. There were plenty of other opportunities to meet people, but it was also nice for my introverted kid to be able to get away from the crowd and be alone sometimes. And it was nice to be able to actually study in the room instead of constantly having to hunt for quiet environments in lounges, libraries, etc.
Wow! It’s approaching the end of August and the room choice hasn’t been made yet?
What does your son think?
I thought my daughter would hate sharing a room, but it turned out to be a great experience. There’s a lot you can learn by having to live with a roommate.
DS was initially unhappy with the triple room arrangement and has requested a double. He was offered a single because these are the only ones available. He is eager to make friends but does not want to have roommate drama.
I think a single is a great option. He can sleep when he wants, study when he wants and head out to socialize. Freshman year is challenging enough-being able to control his own environment will help him stay healthy and rested.
You may regret that you share the room. You do nothing wrong when you choose a single room. There are many threads about roommate troubles on CC.
@coolweather, you are absolutely correct. That’s why he wants to make the right decision.
single room 100%…that is your sanctuary. you control the lights,visitors, noise etc… and avoid lots of petty fights (and if you get the wrong roommate or in this case roommates your son will be very sad he choose a triple)
It’s so hard to say because there are so many factors.
Is your kid social and easygoing? Do you get to talk to the roommates before you pick?
The only downside I can see from a single is your kid might be kind of lonely. The downsides from the triple are, well, a lot more…
And I say this from being in a triple my freshman year of college and loving it (I hated being alone, and that was enough to trump all the annoyances of sharing space).
To avoid loneliness, the kid should join activities with house mates, suite mates, floor mates,… This could be more fun than just having just one or two friends. Both my kids had single room but they had tons of friends.
Absolutely share a room.
He is more on the introverted side. He discovered about the roommate selection late and did not get to select his roommates. He was randomly placed with two other people.
Between boarding school and college, my kids have had a lot of experience with dorm living, both in shared rooms and singles (never triples though). They’ve come to really appreciate singles. Both are very social but they do want/need alone time to decompress from that social activity. They also enjoy having their own space to decorate how they like, have their own schedule, maintain their own level of cleanliness (or messiness!). I don’t think it hurts to have the experience of sharing a room with someone at some point in one’s life but that doesn’t outweigh some benefits of having a single.
I think having a triple would be much more difficult than a double, especially if it a “forced triple” meaning the space is not large and more designed for use as a double.
My only caveat would be if you think his introversion combined with a single would cause him to be too anti-social. It depends on the individual.
@doschicos, for the last two years, my son had a single in boarding school and he loved it. Due to his introversion, we are trying to encourage him to be more social. However, we are uncertain about a triple. He tried to reach out to his roommates to his roommates and they have not responded.
I would think a triple could be pushing the comfort level for some introverts. As a boarding school student, it sounds like your son probably had experience with roommates before he was able to get singles at boarding school? If he works well with a single, I’d go for that. It’ll probably cost you more. If you are concerned about his socialization, perhaps work out a deal whereby you’ll be willing to pay more for a single over a triple if he agrees to join X number of clubs, intramural teams or visibly demonstrates he is social engaging in other ways.
During his freshman year, he had a lousy roommate and he had to move in with another person. His second year’s roommate was a nice person.Then, he decided to go solo for the following years.
The single worked well for him except that he became accustomed to being a loner!