I am currently faced with a dilemma and need some insight. My dad is in the army and I have had a disruptive high school experience: I’m currently on my third high school. I am a senior and am full-time dual enrolled and have not had the opportunity to make high school friends like I would have at other duty stations. I am a fairly well adjusted kid but this move has been pretty tough. I haven’t spent much time on the high school campus and haven’t gone to homecoming, winter formal, won’t be at prom this Saturday, etc. I have come to terms with not having that quintessential high school and senior year experience. The only problem is my parents don’t like that I am not participating and feel I am missing out on something. They want me to go to graduation and what not but it just doesn’t hold the same value. I personally feel as if students go to graduation to appease family members than for the experience. I am fine skipping it and focusing on moving on to a new chapter in college (I’m going to an SEC school 
!!!). My parents, who both grew up in one place, frankly just don’t get it on this one. Am I being unfair to them somehow? Now that I’m off my soapbox, could you guys give me some advice? Will I really be sad I didn’t go to graduation?
Well - since you aren’t very invested in this school, you probably won’t feel like you’ve missed anything. However, it sounds like it means something to your parents, and you might feel bad later on that you didn’t do this for them. If there is some reason that it would be really painful for you to go to graduation, talk to your parents about it and see if you can get them to see it your way. If you just don’t see the point, why don’t you just do it for them? It’s only a few hours out of your life, and if it would make them really happy to have a picture of you in your cap and gown, why not?
Just my opinion.
Regardless of how attached you are to your current HS, graduation is a milestone, marking YOUR accomplishment, so it might be a good idea to go. Just for the photo-ops.
It will be nice, 20 years from now, for you to have some photos your kids can look at.
The ceremonial aspect tends to be important for parents, even if it is not for the student.
Do it for your folks. Get through the ceremony, go out to eat, move on.
I honestly would have skipped both my high school and college graduations were it not for my parents’ wishes. It meant a lot to them.
I say: Do it for them.
I honestly do not remember a single thing from my high school graduation other than surprise at who gave the commencement speech. On the other hand, I do remember my kid’s graduations very well. Do it for your parents.
I went to every graduation for my parents. It was the least I could do for them. I generally recommend others do the same, but it’s your life.
Crap, I knew this would happen if I posted in the parents section, but I’m glad I did lol. I guess I should go.
I skipped my college commencement and have always regretted it. Just go, even if it doesn’t seem like a big deal to you.
I’ll go against the crowd here. It doesn’t sound like you or your parents have been at this high school very long, so there is no attachment to other students, parents or teachers. While graduating from high school is a major milestone, the actual commencement ceremony doesn’t sound like it would be very meaningful to you. And if you haven’t been part of the school, I can’t imagine the specific ceremony being all that meaningful to your parents.
Can you suggest an alternative activity marking your high school graduation in place of the ceremony? Maybe have them make a big deal of starting college. Have them attend the freshman convocation (if your SEC school has one - Florida does)
FWIW, my nephew who did grow up in one place his entire life skipped his prom, homecomings, and graduation (he had an early summer obligation). His parents survived and they were very excited about his next adventure - college.
My son had a very typical HS experience with no moving. He didn’t want to go to graduation either. I told him he had to, but he can do what he wants for college. He sucked it up.
His graduation was on his birthday which he was pretty disgruntled about.
For the record, I’m not a parent, and I still think you should go if your parents want you to. It’s really not that big of a deal.
Not quite the same thing, but… There was a medal ceremony earlier this semester at my college. Two people I went to high school with also had high enough GPAs to get a medal. Neither of them went to the ceremony. I went because my parents wanted to come.
I’m glad I went. Got some nice pictures, spent time with my dad, felt like I had accomplished something. Graduating from high school is a great achievement, and sometimes a little pomp and circumstance is good for the ego.
Parent here saying I see no need to attend. Back in the days when much fewer students went on to college, the high school dropout rate was higher, and we were a more agrarian society, I guess I could understand the big deal about high school graduations. In this day, I don’t really see the reason for all the hoopla. But I’m more of a moving on kind of person and definitely not a looking back kind of person. I didn’t go to my college graduation because I graduated early.
Explain to your parents calmly and clearly why you don’t want to go and suggest an alternative to mark the occasion like a nice dinner out. If they are still very vested in the graduation idea, might just be a good idea to go with it to please them.
I doubt you will miss out on something. Mine was meaningless, and my father couldn’t go because he had to work.
College graduation was totally different, I was very happy to go to my college graduation.
I think if your parents really want you to go, go and just suck it up. In some ways, if you don’t go, they might feel bad that they “robbed you” of wanting to go.
So: you might not be sad directly, but perhaps you will be sad indirectly, because especially if your dad can make it, your parents will be glad you persevered and finally are done with HS and moving on to better things. If he missed out on other stuff, and made the family move multiple times, this could be a chance to be a normal parent for a change.
I’d nix a graduation party though LOL…
Go to graduation. You didn’t give a single reason that you shouldn’t go. It’s a few hours. What else are you going to do? There is no downside to going. Go to Graduation.
Are you also graduating from a CC where you are dual enrolled? If so, that might be the place to put on the cap and gown.
My son chose not to go to his high school graduation, and nobody in our family cared.
But in some other families, people do care. Family members may want to see you graduate because it’s an important milestone in the family’s history.
In that case, I would go to the graduation for their sake. You wouldn’t be honoring your experience in high school (which seems to have been nothing special), you would be honoring your family members’ wishes.
And if you’re bored at graduation, which you probably will be, just look at the people in the band and the chorus. They have to sit through this tiresome ceremony every year!
I am a parent but I say if you don’t want to go then don’t go. I went to the same high school for three years (studies abroad my junior year). I opted to skip graduation so that I could have elective surgery and recover in time for a fun summer job as a day camp counselor. I’ve never once regretted skipping that ceremony and my parents never said a word. I did go to my college graduation - and I was a student there for only 2.5 years. That was a big deal and I’m glad I went. My parents were there. When I received my MBA (from an Ivy), I attended my graduation but told my parents not to bother. Of course, I also skipped the ceremony a few years earlier when my mom got her doctorate. I would be perfectly happy to skip my son’s high school graduation (especially since it falls on my birthday) if he didn’t want to attend, but he does, so I will. Let your parents have a celebration with family and friends if they - and you - want to mark the occasion.