<p>This has probably been the worst few months of my life. My grades have been really, really low, my boyfriend and I have been fighting on and off, my best friend was kidnapped by her father and is held on the other side of the country, my dog died (she was my baby and had been with me since I was about 4), we put my cat down who had also been there since I was born, I've been constantly sick, my dad had 2 life or death surgeries, my mom lost her job, my other best friend stopped talking to me (there was a rant on here about that earlier) for reasons unknown, and to top it all off, my rape memories came back. </p>
<p>All of this has happened since October. Yes I know, it could be worse. Others have it worse. But that doesn't make it any easier. Plus, I was holding it all inside because I knew my parents would be furious. </p>
<p>Today I broke down and told my mom everything and she said it was ok and a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. She told me that she had gone through this when she was younger and that depression ran in the family. </p>
<p>So now I'm going to start going to a therapist for depression. </p>
<p>The most frustrating thing is, I'm always the strong one. The one that everybody turns to when they have problems. And I've never felt weak. And when I first started to, I got scared and shut down.</p>
<p>I don't know why I'm posting this here, but since I probably spend more time here than anywhere else, I figured you guys would understand that I just needed to put everything down somewhere.</p>
<p>You can talk to some of your teachers and your counselor to figure out how to repair your grades, given your situation. I'll be rooting and praying for you :) Fight!</p>
<p>It's not weak to see a therapist about your problems- one way to look at it is to think that seeing a therapist actually makes you the strong one for trying to help yourself.</p>
<p>you have totally dominating, valuable traits. you're really smart and obviously you can handle a lot of weight on your shoulders seeing as how it took you this long to break down. relax, you'll be fine. nobody can handle an unlimited amount of weight. the queen of the crop has to be watered too (that was kinda lame but i just woke up) so ya you'll be fine</p>
<p>I think it was just that I was more ashamed than anything because I've never been weak and have always been the glue that held everybody together. And I am ashamed that my grades don't reflect that I'm smart or how had I work. </p>
<p>I mean my grades went from all A's in hard classes (except for a B in Spanish ALWAYS grr... lol) to (this semester): </p>
<p>-Honors Anthro: B.
-Spanish 3: B.
-Honors Chem: B+.
-AP English: B+/A-.
-AP Calc AB: C-.
-AP World History: A.</p>
<p>Wow, your problems are even bigger than mine! It was a great idea of you to talk to your mom. I talked to my parents, too, and it really cleared some things up. I agree with Johnson--there is nothing wrong with seeing a therapist. It'll feel great for you to just have some time to talk and sort things out with a proffesional. </p>
<p>I don't know if it is possible to explain your troubles to your boyfriend and best friend? Perhaps they would be more understanding if they knew what you were going through. And as for your father, is he fine now?</p>
<p>Catsushi, I have been explaining it to them but my boyfriend and I are on the verge of breaking up and he, if anything, makes me feel worse. My best friend is battling her own problems with her dad and I don't want to make it worse. </p>
<p>Other than that, I've really unintentionally pushed all my friends away because of the depression. </p>
<p>My dad's... ok as he's going to be I guess. This all stems from a really bad car accident that he's never realyl going to be ok from.</p>
<p>Maybe you and I need to take a break from our boyfriends, hm? Boys at this age do not expect themselves to deal with girlfriend drama, so why not just let them be?</p>
<p>Awww you poor dear. :( <em>internet hug!</em></p>
<p>Lol. Just focus on family. They will always love you.</p>
<p>This thread makes me want to leave CC. Honestly, nobody else was deeply disgusted by the fact that the first post was about how to repair the grades?</p>
<p>^^ No, they're just trying to make me feel better about the grade situation which I admit is a really big deal.</p>
<p>Lol, Catsushi. The only thing that bothers me is that I helped him through his depression but he can't help me through mine >.< But I love him, and hopefully we'll get through it.</p>
<p>aww, i'm rooting for you too! believe me, you have every right to feel the way you do...it's normal to be depressed at one point in life, and it's nothing to feel badly about! just think about how much you have accomplished so far in your life--you've been in love with a boyfriend, you've been able to help out your best friends and your family members...focus on what a happy future you'll have, and it might help you get through these tough times now.</p>
<p>Talk to your guidance counselor and teachers about your situation if at all possible. You don't have to go into detail if you're uncomfortable with it, just let them know that you've been going through a lot of family and personal difficulties and you'd appreciate their support in keeping you afloat academically. They should understand and some might offer to give you extra credit assignments, or just be a little more lenient about deadlines, etc. Definitely tell your guidance counselor, though, as she can mention it in your college recommendations to explain why your grades dipped.</p>
<p>Therapy isn't bad. You get out of it what you put into it, remember that. It can be hard at first, especially if you're not used to opening up about things, but it does get better and easier, until you're at the point when you can live life without it and you can get a handle on everything again. Maybe it's just a limited view of the situation, but you sound like someone who's just over their head with negative situation, and not like you're suffering with a permanent mental illness, which is good.</p>
<p>I've always been an open person, up until recently. When I got overwhelmed, I just shut down. This semester is over in a week so I don't really think it's worth it to try to do extra work now. </p>
<p>4 out of 6 of my teachers already know. The other two I know won't care really and won't help so I've just been really concentrating on those two classes.</p>
<p>Don't worry. I'm sure everyone goes through this from time to time.
Maybe you have seasonal Affective disorder and need some more light/exercise.</p>
<p>I was extremely depressed from october-november. But I had to deal with it and by December, it was all gone. I was really mean to my boyfriend and shut out a lot of friends, only talking to two or three. But they stuck with me and I got through my dark period. I went to the doctor and she said it wasn't uncommon for me to feel darker during winter. I had light exposure treatment (woke up early and exposed myself to artificial light) and more exercise incorporated into my schedule. </p>
<p>A lot of stress lifted off my shoulders after the holidays. Also, many more things were confirmed so I didn't feel so bad. Plus, being a second semester senior helped :)</p>
<p>Wow...that sucks. But I'd have to say that I'm among the 9999999/10000000 people. I have no idea what that's like. The only advice I have is, whatever you do, don't see your counselor about it. Teachers, parents, a therapist, are all fine. But I'm sure you have more experience than I with our counselors.</p>
<p>About relationship problems, I can't really help, but I would say try it for a little longer, and if it doesn't work, it may be best to cut it off.</p>