So My Friend Lied...And Got Into Her First Choice

<p>Tell her that you are going to disclose everything to QuestBridge.
If she regrets, then don't tell QuestBridge. It would be ruthless.</p>

<p>
[quote]
idk, i'm kind of in the same mindset as your friend when it comes to cheating/lying. throughout highschool i've cheated, lied, BS'd conuclers, assistant principals, the principal, sold out others to get ahead(but never snitched on a friend). do i like doing it? i guess not. do i feel even the slightest bit of guilt or remorse? not even close, and would do it exactly the same over again.</p>

<p>"by any means necessary"

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Hard-core Machiavellian I see. You're my new HERO! Move over Dubya.</p>

<p>I agree with austin. Talk with her about it. If she expresses remorse, maybe you shouldn't contact QuestBridge. A lot of people make mistakes and I think it might be too cruel.</p>

<p>HOWEVER, if she doesn't care that she lied, tell QB right away. It's only fair. They might be able to reward the scholarship to someone else.</p>

<p>Haha you guys are hilarious.</p>

<p>Austin - I think I'm going to try to talk to her again. I don't know how much it will do, but I just feel like she needs to do this on her own. I think moral discovery is something she can only do herself...maybe? I don't know. We'll see. Thanks for the advice. :]</p>

<p>Diesel - So...the outcome is more important than the process to you?</p>

<p>Optimization, what if she never feels remorse? I'm sorry, but I wouldn't let her get away with it. It's sort of like the "witness"-condition. Someone sees a victim being beaten up. They do nothing, expecting the bully to learn on their own. This just doesn't always happen and it's unfair to the victim to not stand up for them. </p>

<p>And why are you disagreeing with diesel? It's not like you're going to do anything about it if she doesn't confess to QuestBridge on her own. You are already pretty sure that what you say won't matter: "Wow. So many differing strong opinions. I'm not sure what to do. I don't think telling her I'm disappointed would work because I have told her that in regards to other things, and she doesn't really seem to care. Her sister got into MIT with a little fibbing (I don't know much about everything she put or didn't put), and she says that it doesn't really matter." </p>

<p>You want her to figure it out on her own, yet you don't believe it will work: "but I just feel like she needs to do this on her own. I think moral discovery is something she can only do herself...maybe?" You think that the process is more important than the outcome and yet you seem hesitant to do the right thing when it is required of you.</p>

<p>I'm not here to bash you, but .. anyways, good luck.</p>

<p>Murky's got a point. She will never regret unless you threaten to do something about it. You have to stand up for yourself, your rights.
It's not fair to not only you, but others. Eventually, everybody will start lying on their applications ==> chaos</p>

<p>Murkywater + Austin- You're right. I am contradicting myself. I'm being unfair to that person who deserved the spot just as much as she is. I'm going to talk to her one more time, and let her know that I am going to tell Questbridge if she doesn't. Thanks. I think I needed to hear someone say that. </p>

<p>Thank you.</p>

<p>Good luck, Optimization!</p>

<p>
[quote]
Diesel - So...the outcome is more important than the process to you?

[/quote]
</p>

<p>depends on the siutation. if it's something in school or job wise; for the most part, yes. </p>

<p>imo, telling questbridge helps no one, and only hurts your friend and yourself. if you think she is the only person how bluffed their application you have your head in the sand</p>

<p>Why not do it, if you can get away with it? Some of you take academic life way too seriously, and will turn on a friend. </p>

<p>I bet you feel like a chump though lol</p>

<p>Well, why didn't you confront her while you were reading the application? That would have been the time to say like, "If you get in, I'll have to report you"-->scare her into truth. Finally, IF she really doesn't care, why is she your friend?</p>

<p>
[quote]
Optimization, what if she never feels remorse? I'm sorry, but I wouldn't let her get away with it. It's sort of like the "witness"-condition. Someone sees a victim being beaten up. They do nothing, expecting the bully to learn on their own. This just doesn't always happen and it's unfair to the victim to not stand up for them.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>I fully agree with this statement. </p>

<p>I personally can not justify lying on applications, cheating, ect... but she is your friend. While the right thing to do is to rat her out, so the more qualified person gets the scholarship, I would never be able to do it to one of my friends. I bolded friends because there are people that I know, that if they cheated, I'd report them, but my friends, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. </p>

<p>Thankfully, I've never had to really deal with a situation like this.</p>

<p>Why snitch? Sooner or later, lies will end up catching up with her.</p>

<p>Report her. There are surely more deserving candidates. In this case, I'd say it doesn't matter at all who we're talking about. Be the Euthyphro here.</p>

<p>Report her. She has to learn sooner or later (sooner better than later) that she can't live life like this. It's not fair for the people who are more deserving.</p>

<p>Also you're forgetting one thing, If Questbridge deems the lie "a small one", then it probably won't affect the decision that much, but if its major then she'll pay. Even if truly did not lie and you just misread the application, all Questbridge will ask is to confirm the activities. It won't listen to (no offence) a random guy on the Internet.</p>

<p>I think the scholarship should be giving to someone more deserving.
I was contacted to do the QuestBridge application and simply didn't do it.</p>

<p>"I personally can not justify lying on applications, cheating, ect... but she is your friend. While the right thing to do is to rat her out, so the more qualified person gets the scholarship, I would never be able to do it to one of my friends. I bolded friends because there are people that I know, that if they cheated, I'd report them, but my friends, I just couldn't bring myself to do it.</p>

<p>Thankfully, I've never had to really deal with a situation like this."</p>

<p>My friends, unfortunately, are people just like everyone else -- they are not above cheating, lying, etc. If they cheated, I would report them. If they were truly my friends, they wouldn't do it in the first place.</p>

<p>tell them about what she did. If she's really your friend, she'll understand that you're doing it for her own good.
But if your little tattle makes you look bad in front of the guys accepting applications, then don't. You also want to help yourself, right?</p>

<p>Boy, do we have low standards for our friendships....to still call this lying little twit a friend is astonishing, she lied and potentially hurt you or other people </p>

<p>That is not someone who would remain my friend at all, I couldn't trust her, for if she is willing to o something that could hurt you with her lies, who knows what else she is capable of for her own self interest</p>

<p>If you don't report, I would distance myself as her friendmwho needs a liar and a cheat in their lives</p>