Guys, please give some general advice on this. I am sober and have always been one. I never had a sip of alcohol in my entire 21 years. I struggle with it though when it comes to having fun or enjoying a party. I am an international student who is a fluent speaker but find it hard to loosen up around people. So, being sober makes it harder when there is drinking taking place in a hangout. What should I do with my life to have fun around people and make more friends? I am pretty humorous and sarcastic but I just get intimidated sometimes to be outgoing or loosen up as I mentioned earlier. I fear that I am wasting my college life which should be the best, most fun time of my life into being lonely and miserable and not getting over myself. I wish if I could just drink, get drunk, and think less about things before doing it. I can go to the bars in downtown and hit on any girl but overthinking always tackles me. Drinking would make it easier I am sure but I just can’t take such a decision. I am kind of constricted and have some principles that I am choosing to stick to. You probably know what I mean. I know all about the drinking culture in college but I just choose not to be part of it. But at the same time, I want to have genuine fun with people and drinking always has to be present. Also, some people who don’t drink are so boring to be around honestly lol. It’s really complicated.
If you’re 21, you’re almost done with college, aren’t you? I don’t know what advice we can give you. Lots of people don’t drink. It’s not a big deal. Maybe take some public speaking classes so you’ll more comfortable talking? Join a church and hang out with their young adult group? Study hard and don’t worry about partying?
Plenty of college kids don’t drink, although I’m sure the majority do. My D does not drink nor has she ever tried anything more than a sip here or there to “taste” and busies herself with clubs and working out, goes out to restaurants and movies and has gotten a good rep as the one to call as a designated driver now that she has a car at school. I thought she would surround herself with others who also are substance free (as is her housing) but that’s near impossible lol and she has learned to be less judgmental about peers who make different decisions than the ones she is making at the present. Surround yourself with peers who have the same interests, regardless of whether they are sober or not and enjoy their company doing the things that are mutually enjoyable.