Someone went around to the teachers and told them that I'm stuck up.

Pre-College Issues High School Life
1

<p>This is complicated.</p>

<p>These girls went to our guidance counselor and told him that my friend and I act like we are better than everyone else. I don't even know why they did this.</p>

<p>The guidance counselor told them to either ignore it or go to their teachers. They went to their teachers and told them.</p>

<p>I barely even know these two people, yet they hate me. My friend and I, we are top of the class, and we are good students. I am first in class, and people always assume that I'm snobby and stuck-up. I never really thought that people thought that of me. </p>

<p>I only found out this year, when one of my friends told me that when she first met me, she assumed (on the basis of nothing) that I was a snobby stuck up prep because of my class rank and the way I dress. Anyone that knows me can say that I'm not that way at all-- and that rather, I'm the exact opposite. I'm messy, weird, and rather eclectic. </p>

<p>The fact that I'm Asian and get good grades makes the whole "stuck up" accusation very easy to believe.</p>

<p>I always make it a conscious effort to NOT say bad stuff about people. I'm human, so it slips sometimes. I occasionally do end up saying something bad about someone, but it happens rarely. And when I do feel the need to express myself about certain people, I at least say it as nicely as possible.</p>

<p>Apparently, the two girls that went to the guidance counselor and said this about me and my friend always talk badly about us in the lunch room. If we correct a mistake they make, they start talking about it at lunch. Last time my group presented a PowerPoint presentation, I ended up talking more than anyone else. They started complaining about that. All the while, the rest of their lunch mates just sit there and ignore them. One of these two girls is very ambitious herself, not to mention.</p>

<p>Recently, my friend actually bumped this person out of the 3rd in class rank. This could be a reason as to why one of these girls dislikes my friends so much.</p>

<p>You know what enrages me the most? I actually used to stick up for these people when my friends criticized them for being dumb or something. I would tell my friends that not everyone is as smart as they are, etc. My friend and I aren't the ones that talk badly about these two people -- other people in my less closer friend groups do. That's why I have no idea why WE were targeted. </p>

<p>Maybe it's just me, but I personally think they are insinuating, and trying to make us look really bad for the teachers.</p>

<p>Either way, the teachers now think me and my friend are very stuck up people. This will definitely harm teacher recommendations, student of the month, etc -- anything that needs teacher nominations. </p>

<p>Good bye, good colleges. I have now have no chance in getting admitted. All my high school work is tossed out of the window.</p>

2

<p>Bah. The teachers are idiots if all they can do is believe what stupidity says. It'll probably take time, but if you stay yourself, I really doubt they wouldn't be willing to reconsider their own judgments. However, if you want to do something about it, you can always confront the teachers and explain.</p>

3

<p>They wouldn't do this (as much) to you if you were white. People hate minorities that work hard. Maybe you should talk to the teachers, iono? I had a teacher once who gave me a lower test grade for a very subjective essay becuase she wanted a white kid to get the higher class rank, she was talking about how white kids were being gipped out of their ranking (***?) . It was so frustrating becuase it was so hard to prove this, and yet I knew they did this to me. My theory is that people are more likley to cuase pain to people of other ethnicities becuase they don't identify with them as much. </p>

<p>btw, i'm not sure what I can do to help, but post it in the parent responses and I am sure you will get a response or two.</p>

4

<p>I've had a good many teachers that prefer to only do small talk with white kids, thus getting to know them better=better college recs. There's nothing you can do about it, becuase you can't prove it and also nobody really gives a **** when it's about asians since people think that asians are not as vocal and thus easily pushed. At the same time, this is the stuff that teacher recommendations are based upon. It's been really frustrating, becuasue not everything is how it seems</p>

5

<p>WOW way over dramatic. I can't honestly believe that two student's opinions of you and your friend were able to change the mind of your teachers. Your teachers see you everyday and they have a sense for who you are. If all of these people believe this is true about you ...then you might want to take a look at yourself. Also to the above poster stop trying to make this about race. It is about jealousy and immaturity but not race.</p>

6

<p>I really wish we could be friends, and I hope I meet people like you in college (like my mom ALWAYS tells me ha). Like, you don't know how much reading that, I felt like saying "ME TOO!". I'm white ( I really don't care about race/etc, I'm just saying it's universal) and people HATE me too because I'm smart and hardworking. I'm pretty shy, I haven't said anything bad about anyone either, and people are always saying I'm stuck up/a biatccch, etc. It's to the point where I have no friends-someone is spreading stuff about me, so that whenever I get to be friends with someone (like talking a lot, etc) they suddenly ignore me and say, "why would I ever talk to you?" etc, when they had been talking to me the week before! </p>

<p>Why? I have a very high class rank (even though it's unranked, and theoretically shouldn't matter if it's unreleased) and they're jealous. JEALOUS! they're jealous. No teacher will believe that stuff. If they've had you in class for a year, and you are smart, you probably raise your hand and they have an independent relationship...most teachers know which kids are grade grubs ("can we have a bonus, pleassseee? can we get an extra credit assignment?????") or the hardworking, smart kids. And teachers who would believe that? Probably not good people to ask for reco's anyway.</p>

<p>Good luck, I really will hope that your situation works out!</p>

7

<p>Eh, there probably is a racial component to it, even if the girls and the teachers don't realize it.</p>

<p>I doubt this means your high school career is "tossed out the window." Teachers know that drama exists in high school and probably will write reccomendations based on their perceptions of you, and not the perceptions given to them by your peers. Just make sure to present yourself well to your teachers and you'll be fine.</p>

8

<p>u probably are stuck up, moron</p>

9

<p>^ I'm not sure how much race plays into this. My friend is Caucasian.</p>

10

<p>Stupid is as stupid does.</p>

<p>I'd normally say ignore them, but it looks like that won't work. Tell your GC what you told us, and your teachers as well. Paint it so it looks like those 2 girls are the stuck-up ones (which wouldn't be hard to do).</p>

11

<p>I completely disagree with the post above. The teacher probably thinks the girls who complained about you are whiners; don't make yourself seem like one too.</p>

12

<p>I think if these girls made a special point to go around to all their teachers to tell them how stuck-up you and your friends are, very few teachers (well, any with good judgment) will believe them. For one, teachers realize that a lot of drama goes on in high school, so for recs, they'd probably rely on their own observations and experiences, not hearsay. Furthermore, if a student told me that another student was stuck-up, I'd wonder more about the maturity of the first student.</p>

<p>While this is a truly unfair and frustrating situation, it's not the end of your high school career. You sound very smart and courteous, so I'm sure that you'll have the good judgment to find the right teachers to write your recs. These teachers probably won't be the type to develop an opinion of a student based on someone else's opinion, and if they know you well (and they have to, at least in the classroom, since you're asking them for recs), then they'll know that the rumors are absolutely false.</p>

<p>For teachers who you'll never have, whatever the girls told them doesn't matter. For teachers that you guys have in common or will have in common, you should show them through your behavior in class that the rumors aren't true. Personally, I don't think it's wise to go up to those teachers and say, "Some girls told you I'm stuck-up, but I'm really not." It'd probably make the situation worse, and it makes you look like you're becoming part of the drama yourself when you're obviously the bigger and better person in this by so far ignoring it.</p>

13

<p>I have a hard time thinking I can ignore it, though.</p>

<p>It's my junior year (that oh-so-important year), and they are sabotaging me. I wanted the honor of book awards, and stuff... but I doubt I'll get any now. It seems like I should be trying to rectify this situation.</p>

14

<p>that really stinks.
but i wouldn<code>t worry about it affecting college bc i don</code>t think it will. the teachers probably realize that those dumb girls are just jealous or gossipers, why ever they did it!?</p>

<p>yeah, don`t worry about it.</p>

15

<p>Rereading my post, I sound a bit snarky. So, in my world, I take it back. :)</p>

16

<p>Talk to someone about this. Don't go to every single one of your teachers "They said I'm snobby but I'm NOOOOT!". Find one teacher that you really trust and can talk to honestly, and tell him/her that this is bothering you. If there isn't a teacher, try your GC or a school counselor.</p>

<p>As for teacher recommendations and the like, you should be getting them from teachers who really know what you're like-- and who will know better than to believe those girls.</p>

<p>Just out of curiosity, how did you hear about this?</p>

17

<p>^ One of their "friends" who sits at their lunch table heard it. She really thinks how much they insult us is really screwed up. She is fed up with them, she thinks they are hypocrites, and she usually just sits there and ignores the two.</p>

<p>This person just recently worked with me in my group for the PowerPoint presentation, and decided to tell me about this. I appreciate it so much.</p>

18

<p>You should try talking to your GC about it, if the GC is someone you can talk to. If not, find another adult you can trust. But honestly, I think your teachers are smart enough to see through the girls' immaturity. Even if these rumors might taint their perception of you, they can't very well write in their recs, "I have heard that PorkFriEdRicE can be rather stuck-up, although I have no evidence to substantiate the rumor." Just keep your classroom performance flawless, and I'd argue that that is a form of "rectifying the situation."</p>

<p>Plus, book awards aren't all that important. Since the requirements for these awards aren't standardized, and recipients are determined by GCs or teachers, they really mean very little.</p>

<p>I realize that not speaking up is an uncomfortable notion because it makes it seem as if the girls are getting away with their behavior, but I think vocalizing your concerns to your teachers might blow the situation out of proportion and make you look too insecure. I'm sure teachers hear rumors about their students all the time, or at least have a general idea of their students' reputations outside the classroom, so chances are that if they don't see anything stuck-up about your behavior in their class, they'll just dismiss the rest as rumors.</p>

19

<p>^ There are teachers that like me, and there are teachers that don't.</p>

<p>My French teacher hates me because I get obnoxious enthusiastic in this class, which kind of sucks for me because I love the subject matter. My English teacher thinks I'm a grade grubber. (In a way, I am. But I try so hard not to be, regardless of all the pressure. I try so hard to value my education, and I find that I do. But I will never stop coming across as a grade grubber.)</p>

<p>Stuff like this exacerbates an already bad perception of me. They probably have no hesitance to believe this sort of stuff about me.</p>

20

<p>I'm sure those two girls didn't make a very good impression, either. I can't think of a savvy way to approach a subject like this with a teacher.</p>

<p>"Oh by the way, Mr. So-and-so, PorkFriedRice is really stuck up. She thinks she is better than us. Gotta go, we're late for math!"</p>