Struggling with depression and college life

<p>Hi everyone,
Im a third-year transfer attending a UC in California. A little background history about myself is that prior to attending my school, I actually attended a UC right after high school. I got incredibly homesick, agitated, and my appetite and sleep were being affected. I withdrew 3 weeks into the quarter and went back home to attend a cc. Within 2 years, I managed to get accepted to another school about an hour and a half away from home. Now, Im back again to a different UC as a transfer student ready to kick ass and get that bachelors degree in two years!
Fast forward 2 months later and I realized that I'm a student struggling with depression. Long story short, after coming back from home the first time I went to visit, suddenly, I began feeling homesick. Within that week, my symptoms began escalating. Once again, my appetite and sleep were being affected. I lacked an appetite and I couldn't sleep comfortably past 6am. Little by little, I bean noticing an all too familiar pattern. I had intense anxiety and just dreaded that tasks I had to do for the day. I cried almost every night and day. Everything scared me academically wise. I was beginning to doubt myself and my ability to do good here. At this point, I just wanted to go back home.
Being a student of color, most specifically a Latina, I went to a cultural resource center in which I got involved with some organizations. In doing so, I felt somewhat alleviated from certain symptoms but something was still wrong.
I still felt like I was missing something. I tried everything to make these negative feelings go away. I have a really close friend and he has helped get through a lot but there is only so much I can bombard him with my issues, you know? Also, I frequently hang out with some of the people from the organization and get along with them pretty well. I seem to be doing just about everything within my reach to socialize and get to know people to expand my social circle. I have even opened up to a few people about what I've been going through.
In the end, I was driving myself crazy. WHY DO I FEEL SO HOPELESS?! My head just couldn't turn off.
Academically, I started falling behind because I was unable to concentrate.
For the past 4 weeks, I ve been seeing a counselor and I decided I will need medication to help me get through this. Reason being, I dont want to give up so easily without fully doing everything I can to help me get through my depression.
In retrospect, I guess I didn't know I had depression at first. After talking extensively with my counselors, family, and friends, I came to realize that I do have it. I know people experience difficulty when adjusting to college and feel all sorts of emotions, but personally I happen to be one of the few who really took it hard.
Right now, I hope to begin medication sometime next month and see where it goes from there. Hopefully if all goes well, I can succeed at this school but if not, I will definitely go back home and attend a college nearer my home.
If anyone and relate and share, please and thank you. Have a wonderful day ^_^</p>

<p>At least you had a close friend to help you get through. I got the same feelings, but i just force myself stop thinking negatively. Attending classes is okay for me, but i would cry on nights. I couldn’t stop feeling bad when I am alone. hope life would be better soon</p>

<p>I’ve been lucky in that I haven’t had much depression since I’ve been at college. My worst episode so far was in early junior year of high school, when I just couldn’t force myself to exert effort toward anything and often thought it would be much easier if I were no longer alive.</p>

<p>I’ve never been on meds or had a counselor, but I suppose whatever works works. It just kinda went away for me. Also, I’m white, so if your depression has been influenced by social rejection, I may not have experienced anything like it.</p>

<p>Something I would suggest is to keep yourself busy. Find something that’s made you happy in the past and see if you can’t kindle something up again. At the very least, you won’t fall behind any further as quickly, if at all.</p>

<p>Depression sucks and I’m sorry you’ve been this affected by it. </p>

<p>I always have some pretty lonely weekends. I usually just sleep, eat, and study. </p>

<p>I was INCREDIBLY homesick when I transferred here from community college. It was actually my first time being away from home…I was 22. It’s not so bad living in my own apartment. I fall behind in classes, but I am kind of a person who works well in high pressure situations. So I get caught up pretty quickly. I’m guessing my main motivation will come after this Christmas when I come back to taking 4 upper-division math and possibly 1 math grad class. I’m not sure if this will bite me in the butt later on, just seems like I don’t have time to be depressed or everything will come tumbling down like a house of cards. </p>

<p>I was very heavily depressed as a freshman in high school, but it’s been relatively okay since. There have been some major bumps. I think most of them are behind me.</p>

<p>A potential home sicker here…</p>

<p>What do you mean by homesick? Does it mean you missed those at home, or that you cannot cope up alone with yourself?</p>