Tell me your worst rejection stories

Parents Forum
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see below, my response was directed to Megan who posted the below. When you don’t follow the whole conversation, you erroneously create your own confusion.</p>

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<p>I agree, Steve. And I’m terrified my stubborn, high achieving D won’t be accepted anywhere. How can this cycle of “apply to more places due to decreasing aceptance rates” be broken?</p>

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<p>moonrise–why does your high achieving D have to go to these schools with high rejection rates? Once you have the answer to that, you have the answer to your question and usually that answer starts with a phrase something like “my parents…”.</p>

<p>I think applying to an appropriate number of schools is a good idea for everyone. I don’t think that number is 16-20 schools, however but 6-10 is reasonable. Students, however, need to apply to a variety of schools. If every school they apply to has a 25% acceptance rate, there is a very good chance they won’t get in anywhere. Our kids have the “stats” to get in anywhere but we have talked about reality with them too. They don’t feel the need to go to HYP (but they would be one of the least expensive options for them). They would prefer to go to a school that has what they want, not just a name on the sweatshirt. The program DS wants isn’t even offered at any of the HYP’s. DS is being courted, hard, but what most people here would consider a “sub-par” school. The stats for the school are actually very good in many areas but especially the program he wants. Why wouldn’t he apply there? He has a very high chance, probably 99%, of getting in. I guess the difference between him and your D is that he doesn’t care what the name on the sweatshirt is as much as he cares about what his potential employers think about the name on the sweatshirt.</p>

<p>I think that kids should apply to 3 reaches, 3 REAL safety schools and 4-5 pretty sure things. </p>

<p>What if you get into your #1 and no other schools and you don’t get any aid and can’t afford to go there? Where are you then?</p>

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<p>@moonrise that’s why it’s important for high stats kids to look at schools like Vassar and Haverford… or Olin, Harvey Mudd, and Cooper Union if they’re a STEM kid. Such schools are around the match level for kids applying to Ivies. Yet they are so often overlooked… and that’s why there are these “no acceptances” horror stories…</p>

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<p>born2dance–I say the opposite is true, it’s because they only look at Ivy’s and the schools you listed that they run into these problems-Harvey Mudd, for example has a 22% acceptance rate, Vassar is at 23%, etc.</p>

<p>Where the problem lies is these kids don’t look at schools with 60-80% acceptance rates.</p>

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<p>Yes, but what you are suggesting is safeties. And they by all means should be looking at those, too. However, for matches for a kid applying to HYPSM, the schools I named are on target.</p>

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<pre><code>I am in the camp of applying to 40 schools and letting God sort them out. The thing that people should realize is that they are not actually applying to schools; they are literally applying to people, their readers. You don’t apply to Yale; you apply to the two readers for Yale. If the readers have a quirk (they think rockclimbing is declasse, preferring ballet), the rockclimber’s achievements will be discarded. People read these applications, and since people are as varied in their personalities, moods, pre-dispositions, etc. it makes absolute perfect sense to recognize this inalienable fact and spread applications far and wide – the Dartmouth reader, for example, a bit more fratty and sporty, may appreciate rockclimbing, while the all-too-precious Columbia reader may hate it. Since I doubt that any of the schools gives specific guidance one way or the other as between rockclimbing vs. ballet (other than, perhaps, each shows some “passion”), you enter into the personality black box of the reader who, being human, cannot help but implicitly read the balance of the application framed by his/her own biases. Of course, this is both the downside and the upside of “holistic” admissions: biases are accommodated, if not actually welcomed. If you get readers (at Tufts, for example) who have bought into the “quirky/nerdy” ethos of Tufts (and may have been or be such themselves!), they will seek out those qualities in the applications they read and boost them. The reader who spent a summer in Spain will naturally feel warmer to someone committed to taking Spanish than he will to someone committed to Mandarin. The whole “apply to 10 well-research colleges” is a bromide. No senior or parent has either the time or the template to research colleges other than barely sufficiently to distinguish them in the “why us” supplements. Surely, no one has the ability to read the minds of the readers, but this is far more important than reading the college catalogue to “research” fit. What would Jesus do? The good Lord said, spread the bread upon the waters.
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<p>On target, sure, but still not a sure thing. Just like our friends’ D, she is “on target” with every school, but still the admissions stats are very low for all of them and each of them has a minimal chance of acceptance. That is how kids get into trouble. She may very well get rejected by every single school and have no fall back…then what do you do? That is the point, not that she can get into those schools, it’s will she?</p>

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<p>@steve Actually, my daughter’s decisions were mostly based on her HS experiences. We pushed her to apply to state schools and she flat out refused. She knows there is a possibility she won’t be accepted anywhere and it’s putting a lot of stress on all of us.</p>

<p>She’s tired of being surrounded by kids who don’t give a crap about school. She wants to get away from the cliques…where it seems popular kids get away with anything they want and kids who play by the book receive no recognition. It’s been frustrating for her and I understand why. She has one safety on her list…fingers crossed.</p>

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<p>Well yeah, but that’s the point of matches. Safeties are an almost sure thing, but matches are just a fairly good chance. An unhooked kid applying to Harvard with really good stats (3.9- 4.0 GPA, 2250-2400 SAT, pretty good ECs) has about 3-5% chance, but that same kid applying to Vassar or Haverford has more of a 60-80% chance of getting in there.</p>

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<p>@born to dance. Meant to share a story very apropos for is thread. Last year’s val at d’s school had a fantastic interview at HM. They even went so far as to tell him he was perfect HM material, outlined possible merit awards, and nearly gave him a verbal acceptance. In the end he was rejected there and ended up with no backup. He ended up going to Chapman (free ride) starting this spring. This kid is brilliant and even had a programming job in HS making fifty bucks an hour. You just never know…</p>

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<p>Yeah, that’s not really true.</p>

<p>Nobody has a 60-80% chance of getting into Vassar or Haverford. It’s not how it works, unless it’s an ED school or an ED app.</p>

<p>That’s what I mean when I say there are kids on CC who just have no ‘real’ matches. They have a lot of reaches and hopefully one or two safeties they can afford. the matches for high stat kids, due to the acceptance stats, just don’t exist. I mean, statistically speaking, these kids will get in somewhere, hopefully, but it can’t be counted on. Some of these kids, for whatever reason, run into a real problem, one year.</p>

<p>If I look at Andi’s story, I see her son eventually ended up at MIT after his second round of apps. But, you know, he was rejected by other schools the year before… you just can’t count on matches in this range.</p>

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<p>Anyone have more stories?</p>

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<p>My brother was on a trip with his band to China and got back, only to be rejected by every school and wait listed by WashU. He cried for literally a week, but luckily he got in off the WashU wait list!</p>

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<p>Steve - I have to say that I still think if those kids have the highest SAT/ACT scores and the highest grade point averages, they’re probably the brightest kids and deserve to go to the top schools. That’s what I meant by the “best of the best”. I never said anything about employment. That’s a whole different argument.</p>

<p>Why should they have to go to “safeties” is my question. It’s true that there isn’t a spot for all of them in each of the colleges, but you would think if they applied to 10 top colleges, that somebody would have room for them. They should be a good fit for somebody. But the fact that so many of those spaces are taken by students who are not as intelligent makes it difficult for those who are scoring really high - they get shut out. What was all their hard work for? They might as well have had a good time and goofed off and applied to all “safety” schools.</p>

<p>We all know that it’s a game - top colleges are not just looking for the smartest kids. They’re looking for athletes, minorities, and anybody else who will make them look “well-rounded”. The result of that is that some really deserving, really smart kids will wind up with a pile of rejections and in a school less fitting.</p>

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<p>“I have a feeling I might be posting a story on here come mid-April.” </p>

<p>“Just like our friends’ D…”</p>

<p>SteveMA you seem to be very interested in your friend’s D.</p>

<p>“…this girl is going to have a hard time getting a job in any field that requires her to work with other people. She just doesn’t have the social skills to do that. Colleges figure that out. She won’t be the first one to experience that.” </p>

<p>I think it’s is a bit presumptuous to assume your friend’s D may not only be rejected by all of the schools she applied to, but will have a hard time getting a job in any field. I’d be very annoyed if it was my child you were discussing on CC. College is a time of growth and development. Dooming her future employment prospects is a bit premature, imo.</p>

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<p>Oh, boo hoo! Come on. No “really deserving, really smart kid” is going to end up at a school that doesn’t work out if he or she applies his or her brainpower to create a list that includes terrific schools that accept a greater percentage of applicants than the top 10 or top 20 schools (or whatever arbitrary marker of “top schools” anyone wishes to apply).</p>

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<p>The problem with your statement is that colleges build classes and a community of learners. So not only are they looking for high scoring high gpa kids, they are also looking for musicians, dancers, athletes, rocket scientists, poets, rich kids, poor kids, etc.</p>

<p>If you get the opportunity, I would recommend that you read The Overachievers by Alexandra Robbins.</p>

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<p>I think that if you truly believe that only students with the highest gpa/test scores “deserve” to attend top schools, then you have a myopic view as what elite college admissions should be. Keep in mind that Harvard is not at a loss of students applying who have perfect SAT scores, extremely high GPAs, number one class rank and unbelievably great extra-curricular activities (this could be subjective because at what you and your school may see as unbelievaly great Harvard could consider to be nothing special). </p>

<p>Since this same topic comes up every year, this time of year ith repeat performances in the spring, I am going to recommend a few threads for you to reveiw so that you will see that there is nothing new under the sun. </p>

<p>**My Dinner With An Admissions Officer **</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/118616-my-dinner-admissions-officer.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/118616-my-dinner-admissions-officer.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>He believes way too many people are overly preoccupied with GPA’s and standardized test scores. He believes these are almost always bright line tests, rarely anything more. Exceed the threshhold and the REAL review begins.</p>

<p>Most colleges today are concerned about putting together a well-rounded community and are not necessarily looking for well-rounded individual students. The elite colleges truly want “superstars” in many of the niche fields and EC’s. Having said this, students who are well-rounded at a VERY HIGH LEVEL never go out of vogue. </p>

<p>**Just How Hard Admission Can Be **</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/116204-just-how-hard-admission-can.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/116204-just-how-hard-admission-can.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Admissions stats provide a reality check - even very high-scoring students have a low probability of admission at some schools. </p>

<p>**“Whoever has the most APs wins” **</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/97255-whoever-has-most-aps-wins.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/97255-whoever-has-most-aps-wins.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Post # 49 by Ben Jones, College Rep for MIT is definitely worth a read:</p>

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<p>Quote from the OP:</p>

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<p>Folks, please see the thread title. The OP asked a specific question; he/she is looking for a little reassurance from our own past experiences, and I doubt that this general debate about admissions trends is helping. There are plenty of other threads on which to discuss this topic.</p>

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<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-admissions/1110043-rejected-everywhere.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-admissions/1110043-rejected-everywhere.html&lt;/a&gt;

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<p>Got into John Hopkins.</p>