The Fordham Family

<p>You've all heard the phrase before. I just want to attest to just how true those words are IMHO. </p>

<p>Yes, my S is a brand new LC freshman. And already he LOVES Fordham. But sadly, on Friday, we had a death in the family when my FIL passed away at the age of 68. It was one of those stories where we celebrated his bday in May blissfully unaware and then later that week he went to the hospital for something minor and came out with an appointment with an oncologist. Within a week he went from living out an active retirement...symptom free...to a Stage 4 cancer diagnosis.</p>

<p>So, first off, NEVER EVER wait to tell anyone anything important in an instant information age. We were hoping that my S would attend class on Friday and I would come get him that afternoon. But he checked Facebook while sitting in class waiting for his professor and saw a note of remembrance from a relative which was obviously NOT the way we wanted him to find out. And btw, if you ever want to send a message of condolence or remembrance publicly it IS a good idea to be sure that the family has all been notified first. We all had to change our plans because of facebook and pull kids out of school and call the ones at college sooner then we wanted to. But I digress. </p>

<p>The professor came into the classroom and looked at my S and asked what was wrong. He told her and she sent him back to the apartment and told him not to worry about anything. Then he called his Theatre professors to tell them he would not be in class and they too said the same. His last call was to Fr Vin DeCola, dean of the first year experience, because he had been told at Orientation to call him if there were any problems. So Fr. Vin called back and left a message of condolence and assurances of the prayers of the entire Jesuit community and said that he would take care of notifying all of his professors. Fr. Drance in the Theatre dept said the same...everyone my S has encountered has been so supportive and concerned and nobody wanted him to worry about school or what he was missing or how far behind he would be. They all wanted him to be at home comforted by family without burdening him. THIS is what family is all about. And I truly believe that when Fr. McShane talks of the Fordham family and care for the whole person, he actually means it! It's not just a line to sell you a school.</p>

<p>I do think that if my S were in another school people would still be supportive. But this went above. The fact that the dean would take care of informing people so my S didn't have to worry about it and that priests would call to check in and offer their prayers and condolences...I'm a mom sending my kid off to school to learn to care for himself so it's extremely comforting to know that there are people at that school that care for him, too!</p>

<p>The funeral was yesterday and my S decided to go back last night. I couldn't have been any happier dropping him off at Fordham knowing that he's part of the family.</p>

<p>Just wanted to share.</p>

<p>I am so sorry for your family loss. But yes, the Fordham family does reach out. It happens with events like this, with a student being sick, with any sort of personal crisis. We have had a couple of “events” in the four years we have been there and almost without exception (cf. an adjunct professor of philosophy who was a total jerk and later with another professor who made an inappropriate remark/agenda driven…but that was dealt with) we have had highly supportive faculty, some of whom have gone beyond the call of duty to reach out, or to do a favor, make a phone call, help with job placement etc. Yes, it is in their interest to do so…as Fordham students excel, it helps the school and the professor’s reputation. But its not all self serving help. And I also want to reiterate the importance of going on campus ministry retreats when offered. THey are AWESOME experiences. </p>

<p>I am glad that Fordham helped you all out in a time of need and hopefully your son can gather his thoughts and continue to focus on his studies as he mourns the loss of his grandfather. Its hard to lose grandparents at such a young age. </p>

<p>We too, here on CC, are members of the Fordham Family and can be supportive for each other (even if we disagree on issues). God bless.</p>

<p>Sandmom, so sorry for your loss. We lost my father in a similar way as you. It is not an easy time for your family.
What a wonderful caring experience your S has at Fordham though. This is heartening to me, as Fordham is one of our top choices.</p>

<p>Sandmom - sorry for your loss as well. College years seem to be especially hard on grandparents, as when I was an adjunct there was always someone in a class of 25-30 who lost a grandparent during the semester. </p>

<p>Personally, I lost my grandmother in my freshman year, my mother in my sophomore year, got divorced in my junior year, and lost a boyfriend in a car crash my senior year. Life sure makes things challenging!</p>

<p>I’m so sorry to hear of your loss sandkmom. I am however touched at the thoughtfulness of the Fordham community. The theater program at Fordham is one of my daughter’s top choices and it seems like a great place.</p>

<p>Sorry to hear about the loss in your family. It is heartening to hear how Fordham stepped in to allow your son to spend the time he needed to focus on his grief and his family before returning back to school. I wish you and your family the best in what must be a difficult time.</p>

<p>I, too am sorry for your family’s loss. Seemed so quick and unexpected, which makes it harder to deal with.</p>

<p>When we attended the Open House in D’s senior year, deciding which college was right for her, I remember Fr. McShane said that Fordham was such a close campus (this was at LC), that if your child didn’t feel good and missed class, you could almost expect someone would call to check on him or her, and then ask how they were feeling when they saw them the next day. That was one thing that impressed us, rather than getting lost in a huge crowd in a large, uncaring environment.</p>

<p>It is wonderful that you experienced that closeness first hand, albeit sad it was under these circumstances. It must be a comfort knowing that your son is surrounded by people who truly care. I know I feel that same sort of peace knowing my daughter is in the right place, as well.</p>

<p>Thanks everyone for your replies. Yay CC! Yay Fordham! Caring and compassion do make life a little easier.</p>

<p>Sandmom, my condolences, too! We lost my mil 2 yr ago to Alzheimers & I my mom 9 yr ago suddenly also. It’s especially hard on the children to lose a grandparent – hard on us as adults, too, but we expect our parents to pass on before us. But kids don’t see it coming. </p>

<p>Awfully good things to hear about Fordham, though! God bless them.</p>

<p>I regret to inform you all that Fordham is once again in a deep state of shock and mourning. We lost a young soul today at 1130 am on Rose Hill campus. May his soul reach the loving arms of Almighty God, find Eternal Peace, and may the Love and Healing powers of His Spirit embrace his family. </p>

<p>Fordham needs to stick together tonight people…and always. This is painful. I reach out to his family and friends, both at home and on campus. </p>

<p>Fr. McShane has issued a statement. Go to Fordham’s facebook page.</p>

<p>God bless.</p>

<p>What a tragic loss of such a promising individual. My thoughts and prayers are with his family, friends and the entire Fordham community.</p>

<p>I didn’t see it on Fordham’s FB page, can you post a link or tell us what happened?</p>

<p>I found this article online. So tragic.<br>
[Suicide</a> shock at Fordham - NYPOST.com](<a href=“http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/suicide_shock_at_fordham_WY1xJEQ41dBv6FpENdA2fO]Suicide”>http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/suicide_shock_at_fordham_WY1xJEQ41dBv6FpENdA2fO)</p>

<p>One at Rutgers too. And that honors math student at Texas that snapped and killed himself. Very sad.</p>

<p>Lets hope this wave is over!</p>

<p>May God rest Jacob’s soul and comfort his family and friends. </p>

<p>I hope he wasnt posting here in his desperation and loneliness. Does anyone know?</p>