Most events here are considered VERY formal if a jacket is requested. Lots are “aloha attire” and the men wear aloha shirts and women wear whatever they prefer.
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There seems to be a trend in general in the last few years toward less formal weddings. I believe cocktail attire is currently the most popular. Black tie has gone down in popularity but of course is still a good option if that’s what the couple wants. As are more casual dress codes.
I did not want to wear a long gown so was very relieved when son and his wife chose cocktail attire!
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We went to a number of black tie events mostly related to my DHs work….things like lavish grand opening events. DH owns a tux. He also has a second one that was his father’s. He wore a tux to all of these events.
BUT he has never worn a tux to a wedding…not even ours (which was a much more casual event).
He did get a brand new suit for DDs wedding…a nice grey…which he has worn to at least five weddings since.
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My kids have been to at least 12 weddings in the past year and a half (including their own), with several more in the pipeline later this year. All have been black tie optional. SIL has a tux from his college days that he wears. We’re in the south and the tux-wearing seems to be more common here.
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My S has a tux from HS band days that he’s loaned out to neighbors for proms. He left that in HI. He has a wardrobe of suits—black, navy, grey and I believe some with patterns. Fortunately he looks good in suits and enjoys them. NYC and DC are fairly dressy, so he uses them as desired.
Son’s wedding is in a quintessential Southern Inn–you know, the columned white grand dame with the mile-long veranda. We’ll have our martinis shaken, not stirred, and surely a few juleps, too, as we sashay in our finery, fascinators and parasols optional. My kind of event!
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So many cute dresses & shoes! And the wedding plans sound just lovely! 
Just had to tag Hoggirl’s quote from upthread - so true! 
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nvm
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My son put on a suit for his zoom wedding, but was adamant that he was not going to wear his cute dress uniform. Oh well!
Back to shoes. I tried on this sparkly pair this afternoon:
They were quite comfortable, but I’m not sure about the chunky heels. They may be fashionable and may keep me from spraining something, but I just don’t find them pretty enough. I may buy them as a backup, though, as they weren’t expensive, and I may need a change later that night if the “pretty” shoes I’m still looking for don’t go the distance.
ETA: Bought the shoes but will keep looking for that “perfect” pair.
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Nice shoes! It is good to have a backup. 
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I have to say, I’m very jealous of all you folks who don’t need footwear with arch supports. I wish that was something I could tolerate—oh well, we need to know ourselves and be true to ourselves. My body will complain loudly otherwise. 
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I love a block heel!
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Pretty shoes. Maybe chunk heels will work for my son’s wedding (formal-ish, but all outside/lawn). I was thinking wedges would be needed but maybe not.
I actually like that block heel…and the front looks nice which is what matters for pictures🙂.
I wore strappy silvery shoes to walk down the aisle. During dinner, I swapped to a pair of dull silver ballet flats…perfect for the dancing.
Reality check. No one was looking at me!
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Question about bridal trains. DD tried many dresses. Nearly ALL had a train. The wedding venue is outdoor park under the trees (so no grass - or if it is present, will be brown in the summer). I tried to discourage a train for that reason, but without success . Final selection is quite nice; simple & elegant – but with a train 
! I know that can be bustled for outdoor activities and dancing – but any suggestions for the ceremony? It will literally be dragged on the ground, and I’m concerned by the time it is bustled, there will be a nice brown edge. A spray of some type so the fabric will be less absorbant?
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I wouldn’t worry one bit about this. Will there be a fabric rollout down the actual aisle? That would help a little.
Lots of brides walk with trains dragging about….and even indoors, it’s not like the floors are spotless. If bustled properly, the edge isn’t what is on top.
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I’ve been to several weddings among the redwood forests and having their trains dragged around the ground didn’t seem to bother the brides. Yes, their trains were dirty, but nobody cared.
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My sis as a bride wore sparkly zoris for her wedding. Another bride had all women in bridal party switch to ballet flats at reception. They danced in that or barefoot on grass.
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I loved the dress I found as a sample (decades ago) but didn’t want the train. So I had it taken off during alterations and used the material to make myself a matching purse from the material. I’ll take a picture if I can track it down…
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