The princess has launched.....are guys easier?

Parents Forum
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<p>My daughter is a sophmore in college, my son is a junior in high school. I feel like I just got her all settled and we are making lists on potential schools for him. The process of "settling" a princess is not easy.....I should have known when she wore heels and a boa to the grocery store as a 2 year old that things in her life were going to require ruffles. </p>

<p>She moved into the sorority house this year - I was thrilled - how much decorating/clothes can possibly fit into a 10x12 room shared with another person? A LOT as it turns out. We spend a glorious summer planning every square inch of space - yes, she measured the hanging space in the closet and choose her clothes one painful decision at a time. The three small shelves were lined with items of perfect height and color to coordinate but not clash with the duvet cover that was choosen at the beginning of summer. We departed last month with my Armada full and her Kia Sorento full....I thought for sure I'd be returning with a lot of "it didn't fit", but not one item came home, she had planned perfectly. </p>

<p>Ten bins a bulging, nine formals flowing, eight drawers of makeup, seven pairs of denim, six nike shorts, five picture frames, four storage baskets, three hair appliances, two jewlery boxes, one totally stunned roommate!!!! </p>

<p>Lovely girl, really smart, waaayyyy too much stuff. </p>

<p>Just visited the first college with my son...</p>

<p>Me: What did you think about the dorms?
Him: Who cares, it has a bed, it has access to a bathroom.
Me: Did you think the rooms were really small?
Him: I didn't really pay attention.
Me: Are you worried about the classes being too large?
Him: No, I can listen the same with 200 kids as with 10
Me: The campus is really beautiful
Him: Mom, who cares about that?
Me: Well, I thought you'd want to be somewhere nice for four years
Him: Nice is good classes and good friends, not where I sleep or how nice the grass is where I walk.......
Me: Ok, then, I guess this one will do. </p>

<p>I can picture us now, all moving can be done in the back of the Honda civic. One bin for clothes (all seasons included), one bit for sports stuff, one small bathroom kit, bed in a bag from target......</p>

<p>Are guys really that easy to transition to college?</p>

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<p>My brother flew with a duffel and we shipped 3 boxes.</p>

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<p>It depends. My S had WAY more stuff than my D.</p>

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<p>We’ve been using garbage bags to bring S’s clothes and linens home since freshman year. :slight_smile: Well, except for his “good” clothes that he wears to formals. Even he puts that stuff on hangers.</p>

<p>I draw the line at taking his stuff TO school in garbage bags, since I have normally just washed and folded everything and even IRONED his shirts. Other than that, we have boxes and bags of books, and three instruments.</p>

<p>It astounds me how much stuff some girls bring to school.</p>

<p>It also astounds me how casually S’s fraternity brothers abandon things like full-sized down comforters when they leave school because there “isn’t enough room” to pack it. I mean, the thing probably cost well in excess of $150. Surely they could throw it in a box and ship it home for $10…?</p>

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<p>I have some ray of hope that S will fall between the brother that took a duffle bag and the guys throwing away their down comforters…YIKES.</p>

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<p>Not all princesses are created equally. My princess went to school freshman year and we rented a minivan because all four of us went to drop her off. Sophomore year, everything fit in the back of the station wagon. She had furniture this year, but she tries to take less stuff each year.</p>

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<p>HAHA @txmom14!! Sounds exactly like my son. He is a freshman at the University of Florida. When I took him to see the school - he cared nothing about the dorms or the class sizes. He was only slightly apprehensive the week before I drove him there to move in to his dorm. A few weeks after I dropped him off I ask him how he likes it and he tells me nothing is really any different. Really? You live 3 hours away from home with strangers and nothing is really any different? I don’t get it. But he is not much of a social person and is a great student so maybe the only change he has really had is the color of his walls.</p>

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<p>Both my boys were really easy. No long hours spent shopping/planning. They were not interested in shopping and told me to just buy whatever was needed. The only unnecessary stuff taken was stuff I thought they might want even though they told me they wouldn’t need it. After the initial freshman move-in, we never had to move them again. They handled it themselves from then on.</p>

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<p>As to bedding and towels and sox and underwear, i think it is a GOOOD idea for some to just throw them away at the end of the year! (I won’t say why…)</p>

<p>Best to buy the least expensive of these you can find and junk at year-end. Saves on shipping, storage, etc.</p>

<p>(You might not really want to know what goes on with these things over the year, or how frequently they actually get laundered - smile)</p>

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<p>Thank you for sharing your princess stories. As a mom of 3 boys, I’m amazed. My DH gets annoyed with me if I fuss with lipstick, but eight drawers of make-up? </p>

<p>You asked if guys are easier and I wouldn’t know. We have way too many video/computer games and game systems. And while your daughter may be a bit obsessed about getting every detail just-so, my boys are diametrically opposed to how their room looks. And this year, I did absolutely nothing to help my sophomore go off to school. No new bedspreads, no duvet covers, no draperies. He washed his clothes, he packed his clothes, and then got in a buddy’s car and drove across the country. </p>

<p>Okay, I bought him a few new jeans, socks, and undies. … eight drawers? really??</p>

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<p>My neighbor sent his son off all of 30 minutes away (made him be on campus as it was time to launch him!). The fella threw a trunk and duffle bag into the back of his dad’s pick up and headed off (while their daughter took a mountain of things!). His mom assumed they took so little because they would be making two trips or sending more stuff later in the week. But he did not come back home again until late October and then only because he was broke and needed to do laundry.</p>

<p>Their daughter calls 3-4 times a week or shoots them a text or email. She is now teaching them to Skype Their son? They know he is okay only because they have access to his online banking and see withdrwals at Starbucks and the local 7-11. Otherwise, he just does not THINK to call…doens’t mean to be dismissive or inattentive, it just does not cross his mind.
So, in that sense I suppose you could stay he is easier…or harder?
T</p>

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<p>Txmom14 – thank you for sharing. I thought I was the only one (and I live in a land far, far away from your great state).</p>

<p>D (Clg Class of '15) said in all seriousness: we should take 2 cars (to drive her down for move in). I’ll need one for just shoes.</p>

<p>Yes – move in was planned with surgical precision. Gobs of money (that I did not have) were spent on things I didn’t realize she needed, but in hindsight, were needed.</p>

<p>S (by comparison) is unruffled when it comes to schools. His only preferences so far are for big and bigger. 50,000 kids? Ok sure. You want to pick out your roommate ahead of time? No not really</p>

<p>Boys are just so much easier. Or maybe they’ve witnessed the drama queen in action and so they mute their behavior accordingly.</p>

<p>It might also be something that’s unique to first born girls. Picky and precise, they’re like cats – very particular about where they lay their head and to whom they give affection. My S is like my favorite golden retriever – fun, forgiving, friendly. </p>

<p>Just write it down and remind her when she has her own Princess. :)</p>

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<p>Yep boys are easier. Mine told me tonight he was using the cardboard box I mailed him some goodies and other stuff in as his pantry. I tried several times to buy him those plastic drawers or rubbermaid container for under his bed-he didn’t want them. Cardboard is good enough (I sure hope they don’t have bugs!!!) :eek:</p>

<p>Sent from my DROID2 GLOBAL using CC App</p>

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<p>My D’s aren’t particular- my oldest wore the same clothes she had in high school, in college or else she swapped with her friends. Younger D is more of a clothes horse but her room in a house off campus, doesn’t even have a closet! ( it has a wardrobe- it used to be a dining room I think, complete with a china shelf around the perimeter)</p>

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<p>My D is very much a minimalist. Right now, she only wants a couple of new things…from Prada. </p>

<p>My son is very basic. He grabs a shirt and a pair of pants from the top of the pile, so I only buy colors that match - gray, white, blue, and tan. As long as we never deviate from that color scheme, no one will ever notice that he has no clue.</p>

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<p>I guess boys are probably easier in general but my daughter moved herself in after flying to college and the poor thing had to haul a desk top computer. #2 child, a son, was moved in with an SUV’s worth of stuff because we could drive to his college. I think they all make it work depending on what they are allowed to do. ;)</p>

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<p>Yes. Sons are MUCH easier. </p>

<p>(Note also, the moon orbits the earth.)</p>

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<p>TXmom, yes. Sons can be MUCH easier. Color of sheets (“whatever you’d like as long as I don’t have to shop for them”). Clothes. “I have two pairs of pants. Why would I need more?” I have one son and one daughter, both in college. After a full court press from a neighbor and our daughter, ShawSon was persuaded that he couldn’t wear the same baggy worn-out basketball shorts for the first day of class and allowed ShawD to go shopping for him as long as he didn’t have to go. She picked out clothes he loves (including a jacket he wore almost every day his freshman year). At the beginning of sophomore and junior years, he asked her if she would mind shopping for him. He wears what she buys. She was happy to do it because she loves shopping.</p>

<p>I will say that as he moved into a 10 person suite, he bought a bunch of things for the room/suite that ended up costing more than we were spending for her room (though her clothes cost a lot more).</p>

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<p>Most boys are probably easier. No makeup and not much hair stuff. Mine doesn’t care about having a lot of clothes. He says he does not care about having sheets on his bed, but I am definitely going to insist he bring them, as he will probably find sleeping on a bare mattress is not the way to go.</p>

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<p>I am glad to hear that I am not the only one with a boy that has no interest in “stuff” and can be easily described as a minimalist. </p>

<p>Shawbridge - my D also shops for my son, somewhere along the way my taste became uncool but he will wear anything she buys him. Maybe I need her to help ready him for college when the time comes. </p>

<p>Emeraldkity4 - my D is a huge clotheshorse. Last year she lived in an off campus apartment, this year in the sorority house. The apartment she lived in last year provided the option to rent a storage closet down the hall from her room, this year she made a deal with them to just rent the closet even though she isn’t living there. She keeps her formal wear and off-season clothes in large rolling wardrobes (canvas covered). Two wardrobes fit in the closet, she visits weekly and doesn’t find this inconvenient. For $60 for the year, I just roll my eyes. </p>

<p>VAMom - My son is not a huge fan of sheets either, he does use a bottom sheet however. I think I’ll buy 3 XL twin sheets and put them all on the bed so he can just remove the top
layer when the time is right. Maybe I’ll pin $20 to the 2nd sheet and ask him to call me when he gets it - will give me some insight into how long he slept on the same sheets. </p>

<p>On the 8 drawers of make-up…ha ha, they are small drawers in a little cabinet thing that fits under the sink. 4 of the drawers are for winter and 4 for summer. D is very fair skinned, only Lancome has a color (alabaster) that is light enough for her to wear in the winter when she has no tan. However, she is a whole shade darker in the summer, so two sets of makeup are required. Yup, I’m rolling my eyes too.</p>