They're baaaaccckkk - year 2

<p>I'm anxiously wasting time until we go to the airport after dragongirl... only a few more hours.
Last year there was a great thread about kid's first vacation home. This time for mine, it's a more familiar routine.... we're used to her coming and going now.
How about at your house? big turkey day reunion? no time to get home? stress and storm or peace and love or sleeping until you are driven to distraction and staying out all night?</p>

<p>Unfortunately neither of mine are coming home, so we're going out of town to their high school football playoff game. Thanksgiving for 2 just isn't much fun at home.</p>

<p>I'm glad (and envious) that dragongirl is coming home. Have fun!</p>

<p>I'll check in after Tuesday.</p>

<p>DW picked up DD1 at school yesterday and all are safe at home. I would say it seems like she never left but she is definitely advertising her young adult opinions. However, she still is sweet to young DS.</p>

<p>Back from the airport - long fun conversation about her major .... so good to see her! So idealistic and full of wonder about the change her generation will bring...</p>

<p>I'm like a school girl getting ready for my 3 and assorted friends to arrive. Sorry as it may sound, I live for these visits and getting to hear all the new things happening in their lives and watching them interact with each other as adults. I was joking with DH that we should go to the airport with balloons to embarrass them!</p>

<p>Neither of mine is coming home for Thanksgiving break this year. But in general, I have found that the back-and-forth gets more natural after the first few times at home.</p>

<p>After mutually deciding no Thanksgiving trip, both positions softened and decided to bring him home after all. However, could not find appropriate ($$) transportation. Will have to wait until December 10. He'll have to look at the turducken on Skype. :)</p>

<p>This is the fist year D won't be home for Thanksgiving. She is studying abroad in Edinburgh this semester (thankfully only a semester!) and won't be home for Christmas until the 21st. It's been hard having her so far away, and I missed taking the annual Parents Weekend trip to her university.</p>

<p>We just found out that she will not be coming home over spring break either. This is all starting to feel pretty strange.....</p>

<p>Hopefully by the time S gets to this age H and I will be used to it all, and can figure out what we are supposed to be doing as empty-nesters.</p>

<p>BengalMom-- I feel your pain. S goes to college out of state.</p>

<p>After freshman year, S announced an out of state summer job. I saw him for 10 days last summer (we went together to Costa Rica). </p>

<p>This year as a soph, he said he wasn't going to be back for Thanksgiving due to short break and expense. Winter break is a job at a ski resort in Wyoming so no visit "home." Spring break he is visiting friends in Mexico City.</p>

<p>He does these activities on the money he has made over the years. So, I got a big hug in August and we communicate occasionally. Mighty proud of the transition he has made to near complete independence. But, sometimes it is a little hard not to see him more often.</p>

<p>I'm very angry with S2 right now. I don't know when he's coming home. His phone has been broken for quite some time. I emailed him this AM and haven't heard back yet. I left him a message on Facebook. I thought I had his roommates' numbers but I don't. If this is what he does in Year 2, I hate to see Years 3 and 4.</p>

<p>
[quote]
Hopefully by the time S gets to this age H and I will be used to it all, and can figure out what we are supposed to be doing as empty-nesters.

[/quote]
</p>

<p>I think you go to more movies. Given the absence of kids and the lack of a need to prepare a Thanksgiving dinner (my husband is on a diet and specifically requested that we don't have one), I think I'll go see Australia on Thanksgiving.</p>

<p>
[quote]
I'm very angry with S2 right now. I don't know when he's coming home. His phone has been broken for quite some time. I emailed him this AM and haven't heard back yet. I left him a message on Facebook. I thought I had his roommates' numbers but I don't. If this is what he does in Year 2, I hate to see Years 3 and 4.

[/quote]

Very Happy - I completely sympathize. My son (who is 22 and lives a whole 10 miles away) was going through a really strange phase last year where he often just would not respond to us when we called him. And it is not like we call him daily. We did try to call him several times in the approach to Thanksgiving just to try and figure out plans - which even if they ended up not involving him do involve other people. He would not answer the phone (which we pay for - I was sooo tempted to just cancel that phone!). Finally he called back 1 or 2 days before - I was po'd. He ended up having to work which i completely understand, but I still don't know why he could not just tell us that. Then my mother was taken seriously ill and I had to leave suddenly in early December for England (son never called before I left and he knew from my husband and daughter than England Granny might be dying - I just could not call him myself because I was too wobbly to be put through the not answering the phone routine). I could not make it back for Christmas (couldn't afford the ticket that would get me home by Christmas plus she still needed help). Son put my husband through the same crap at Christmas. He (husband) and my daughter were invited by a couple of different friends, who knew I was gone, to go for Christmas. My daughter wanted Christmas at home and H could not get son to commit to what he was doing. I was really angry with him and felt he was being very selfish - I actually do understand he may have conflicts and it is hard to sort out the whats and whens between his girlfriend's family and ours. But I just couldn't and still don't understand why he would not just call and talk to us so we know what to plan. I have no problem with him going there then coming here or whatever - I just want to know! Anyway this year he seems to be doing better. Thanksgiving is sorted out anyway. We are going to her (very large) family get together.</p>

<p>My brother actually helped a bit when I was over in England by reminding me how impossibly selfish and inconsiderate he was for a few years in his late teens/early 20s. We actually had no idea where he was living or if he was alive or dead for well over a year at one point. If something had happened in the family we would have had no clue how to contact him. Now he is great with my Mum - since her health has been bad he goes at least once a week to check on her (they live quite far apart and he works full time). </p>

<p>So I think they get a bit more considerate as they grow older. I hope so anyway.</p>

<p>My daughter is working her WS job all day Wednesday (to make up for the money she will lose Thu/Fri) and will come home Wednesday evening then go back to school Friday evening. It is the BIG rivalry football game Saturday and she does not want to be driving into town that day (which I completely understand). She is more thoughtful (maybe it's a girl thing) - she called weeks ago to warn me she wanted to be back for the game - it never crossed my mind she would not be going back for the game but it was nice that she let us know. Of course she goes to school much closer that a lot of your kids so we see her periodically anyway. More often than we see our son.</p>

<p>Swimcatsmom -- I'm sorry things were so difficult for you during the holidays last year. I hope this year Thanksgiving and Christmas will be more peaceful for you.</p>

<p>My friend simply blocked her son's phone, which prompted him to contact her to find out what was wrong with the phone account. She told him she "just knew he must have lost his phone- why else wouldn't he have returned calls or picked up when she rang so she had the phone blocked due to possible theft or loss." That pretty much did the trick- her son made sure to return calls within a reasonable period of time after that. One time I left one of my kids a text that said if I didn't hear from them, I would leave the next morning for a visit to make sure he was okay. That was pretty funny! He is actually very good about staying in touch though, so he knew I was joking around (99% anyways). </p>

<p>I'm not there yet, but my friends' kids seem to shape up and get it together by the time they turn 24.</p>

<p>Our son is abroad this term, too. We'll have to wait until December to see him. </p>

<p>Sigh.</p>

<p>Then another internship out of state this summer. I would whine, but I know this (and the last one) are really good opportunities. </p>

<p>Well, can't I whine quietly? Among sympathetic parents?</p>

<p>
[quote]
My friend simply blocked her son's phone, which prompted him to contact her to find out what was wrong with the phone account. She told him she "just knew he must have lost his phone- why else wouldn't he have returned calls or picked up when she rang so she had the phone blocked due to possible theft or loss."

[/quote]

LOL. I should have done that. </p>

<p>Actually Thanksgiving is not as important to me (I am not from the US originally). We used to always got to the in-laws but now they are in a nursing home. Last year was the first time I was cooking it at home and I was lazy and ordered everything precooked from a local grocery store (mistake - it was truly ghastly!)I find it strange to have the whole turkey fest in November then again in December. Keep thinking I should change the traditional meal Christmas but cannot bring myself to. Christmas is what is really important to me. I tried to enjoy being with my Mum and brother and his wife last year but it was so depressing not being with my husband and kids. Won't mention the whole supervision and instruction from my Mum (love her dearly but ....) as if I had not been cooking Christmas dinner for the last several decades. "yes Mum - I know I need to take the innards out before I cook it - that disasterous duck incident was 35 years ago!". On the bright side I got to enjoy English goodies.</p>

<p>Yes, we can all whine here, quietly or otherwise. :)</p>

<p>My D will be staying on campus to do research next summer, too, but I'm trying not to think that far out. Having her gone for Thanksgiving and spring break are all I can deal with right now.</p>

<p>CC is a great place to whine and vent. makes the whiner/venter feel better and doesn't hurt anyone's feelings. Unless it is on the political forum of course. They just need to die now the election is over. (the forum - not the posters).</p>

<p>Once I do get S2 in my clutches -- I mean, once I see S2 this coming weekend (and again, I don't know if it'll be Monday or Tuesday or Wednesday) -- we need to buy him a new phone. If I could have texted him, I certainly would have. When we get the new phone, it's with a contingency: He calls every Sunday night. If he doesn't, on Monday I go cancel the phone.</p>

<p>That oughta work, right??</p>