oh and yeah…the GPA takes a very big hit from "0"s…and the student in our case had to repeat the F and D courses to meet major requirements…so there is that humiliation also.
@thingamajig thanks for sharing. teen is social and has made friends. I’m fairly certain it’s not mental health, but I suppose confidence could take some knocks due to not doing very well. thanks all for advice. going to think about this overnight.
for those that asked teen is receiving lots of generous need based financial aid.
Then make sure you understand what happens if he drops classes.
To maintain financial aid, the student usually must finish at least 85% of credits taken.
If he he is less than full-time, does he lose aid or housing? What is full-time status for aid at his school?
If there is no mental health issue you are almost in a worse position. No medical leave possible with grades erased, no tuition refund insurance payout, no accommodations etc. Probabation is possible as is loss of aid.
Was he a hard worker in high school? Do you think the so far failed classes are a result of him not working or are they really hard weeder classes? Are you positive there is no mental health issue? How likely is it he will pull the rabbit out of the hat and do well in midterms after not working during the last few weeks?
Worst case scenario, he fails the midterms and/or has to withdraw. Understand that if he ends up withdrawing, not only do you lose that tuition money but you may have to pay BACK the financial aid received. Seriously,
The priority is to find out what is going on and have a good conversation with your son.
But you also need a dean or administrator to fill you in on consequences of various scenarios.
Full disclosure, I once took a kid out and that kid worked for a few years and is now almost a senior in a continuing education program at a great college. I second guess that decision as much as thingamajig questions her family’s opposite one. So there is no right answer over time. But really there is no wrong answer either 
As others have said, be aware of the consequences- in terms of transcript and in terms of finances- of any classes dropped or withdrawn from, and of withdrawing from the school at different points in time. Make sure your son is aware of these. Discuss options with a dean. Then you have to either gamble on your son, or not.
I think your gut is probably right. But you are going to have to convince your son to leave because of potential dire consequences that he doesn’t see at all. Apparently he thinks all is fine and is having fun. So if you go that route- you will need a college dean or advisor or whomever to help you talk to your son. Otherwise, while you are saving his life to to speak, he willl always accuse you of ruining it.
First thing…find out what happens if he goes to less than full time. Things like a Pell Grant, and Direct Loan (which are often part of need based aid packages) are prorated based on full time vs part time status. You need to find out what he will LOSE aid wise if he goes to part time status. It could be 1/2 of his aid for the term.
Find out.
Our kids got merit awards…,we made it VERY clear that if they lost these awards, they would not be able to return to their expensive colleges.
Does your son realize what he needs to do to keep his need based aid at full? Find that out…and make sure HE knows. Find that out today.
Dropping to below 12 credits (the minimum for “full time” status) has financial aid implications. If he has 15 credits but is considering dropping a 4 credit course, this can be a big concern.
Merit scholarships may require a college GPA minimum to renew, so low grades may result in the college becoming unaffordable due to loss of the merit scholarships. Or even not-so-low grades like B grades if the renewal GPA is 3.5 or something like that.
He might be able to drop a 4 credit class and add a 1 or 2 credit class to stay full time. Some schools have them. My college offered these 1 credit geology classes that just lasted half the semester — one semester I took a couple of them, One was the first half of the semester and one was the 2nd half. You want to make sure an added class counts in the total for FA (like a sports/gym class might not).
I’m not sure how teen’s classes are graded. My Ds grades were curved. If I had looked, it would look like she was failing.
I tell my kids that I expect them to pass classes with a C or better. That a C average will get you a degree but may present challenges in internships, starting employment, grad school, etc. I expect them to work hard and use the resources available to them.
I know other parents have higher grade expectations. I don’t. For one reason, my oldest worked very hard but struggled with grades. I really could not ask her to work harder. She went to office hours, used tutors, study groups, etc. I urged her to reconsider her major, to no avail. She did graduate with a sub 3.0.
I decided I didn’t want to start calibrating expectations on my other based on something I could not measure.
That being said, my kids do attend an in-state university. It might be different if they were OOS or in private school or a merit scholarships.
I’d say have an conversation about your concerns and what your expectations are. I know lots of kids that fail a mid-term and get a wake up call—and pull through.
I am predicting this scenario with my youngest who is about to start college. Mr Procrastinator.
It’s one thing if you’re in the middle of your class grade wise then fail a midterm. It’s different if you’ve filed every single test in 2 important (4-credit) subjects. Learning is cumulative - the low grades could indicate poor comprehension, poor processing, lack of work, etc. It’s important to know o that it can be rectified, but three weeks of class content at a college pace is roughly solar to two months in a high school class, so the student needs to fix things quickly to both master the old material AND learn the new material properly.
In my opinion, if one of the classes could be taken pass/fail it may be a solution, or checking for any class that can still be taken so he doesn’t get to part time (skiing may only be offered in the second half of the semester, for instance, hance still possible to add for +1 credit that keeps him at 12).
Have you looked at the syllabus? Just because he is doing poorly on quizzes doesn’t mean that he will do poorly overall. Some classes have papers, presentations, other things that weigh heavily into the final grade. In one class, my son did terribly on quizzes and I wondered if he should change majors. However, the quizzes came early, but the specific class was heavily weighted to case studies and the final exam. Son worked hard, got stronger on the material, professor gave incredible help during office hours, and son ended up with an A-. I urge you to look at how the classes are graded and whether there is anything like a paper or project that is heavily weighted and at which he could excel before making any decisions.
Also, at all three of my kids’ colleges, freshmen students received early notifications of the grade range for each class. Perhaps if your child’s school has that program, there are also procedures in place to help students who are struggling - at the very least, your son would see objectively that there is a problem.
Is he a first generation college student? Many schools have programs for first generation student to help them make the transition to college.
Schools tend to a lot of resources to help students. There are often writing centers, math centers, study skill workshops, tutors and office hours just to mention a few. The problem is that the student has to ask for help.
The decesion to drop a course has to start with why your son is struggling. Is he truely overloaded or is it a time management issue? Is he using the full resources available to him? Once you answer that then you can help him evaluate his options. A discussion with his advisor and his professor could also him him understand his options. Dropping a course should be the last option considered,
“Three weeks is too early to determine your kid may fail.”
Hmmm…I think it’s the last chance to intervene before anything is written in stone. I’d like to know if we’re talking about courses that are cumulative, where a shaky grasp at the start will impede the progress later, like foreign language, math, or chemistry. Struggling at the beginning of those courses is worrisome.
So what was decided?