Hello CC! I’ll be attending the Madeira School in McLean, VA this September. I would really appreciate advice in general (boarding school, all-girls school, academics, sports, dorm stuff, etc.) because I’m really new to all this. Thanks!
Congratulations!
I would start with a recommendation that you go into it with realistic expectations.
Madeira is a beautiful school, and there will be fantastic opportunities for you there and lots of interesting people and opportunities, but please remember it is still high school and you are still going away to school for the first time. There will be interpersonal conflicts, academic struggles, feeling overwhelmed or longing to go back to your old life at times. All is natural and normal. Recognize it when it happens and power through it. Commit to making yourself a success at Madeira and do not spend time looking back or wondering what if?
If things get really bad, talk to your advisor. In fact, no matter what, talk to your advisor. That person is there for you, and can be your best ally when problems arise, whether on dorm, with a particular teacher, or with another student. But, they only know what you tell them about how you are feeling. they aren’t mind readers, and they do not necessarily have all of the information from your dorm, teachers, coaches or other sources.
Just like your old school, there will be mean girls. There will be drama. There will be cliques. There will be girls breaking rules that can get them (or you as witness) expelled. Try not not to get caught up those situations.
Don’t be afraid to try new things. A lot of all of this will be new to many people. Even if you have never played lacrosse or field hockey or been in a play before, you can still try out. When your schedule opens, you can also pick out new subjects to explore.
Be open to everyone, and let things take their natural course.
Sleep is important. If your roommate is disrupting that (snoring, late international calls home, etc.), try to work it out with her directly, but, if you cannot, let your advisor or dorm supervisor involved. There are usually solutions.
This is a four year marathon, not a sprint. You do not have to do everything all at once, but you should get involved in something optional outside of the classroom. Pick a club or two and make time for them. It is a lot easier to make friends outside the classroom than in it.
If you are not really local, try to make friends with some of the girls who live closer to the school. They can be helpful in securing dates for dances. You may also want to stay in at least casual contact with any boys from back home. Another avenue that will help is to attend some of the mixers to meet the boys from other schools.
Since you are an international student, I will add one more.
It will be very tempting to associate primarily, or even exclusively, with other girls from your home country. It is only natural. It is the only way you will be able to speak your native language. You have shared experiences back home that none of the American girls can relate to. You may enjoy the same foods, activities, etc.
You may not believe that girls travel all the way over here to go to a U.S. boarding school only to then hang out just with other girls from China speaking Chinese to each other, but I have seen it happen too often. Even if the U.S. girls want to be friends with someone in that group, it is hard because they cannot join the discussion and feel excluded.
Try to avoid making your entire social life to be with the other girls from China. You will have a MUCH, MUCH better experience if you are one of the Chinese girls who can mix between the group(s) of Chinese girls and other groups. Girls who can do this get all of the benefits of the school. Girls who cannot really lose out.
@EarlyMTNester Thank you so much! I’ll keep your advice in mind. 