To what extent should you help your friends?

<p>I'm a kind and altruistic person but sometimes I fear that helping friends too much can also hurt myself. I love helping friends out with homework or anything else... but the sometimes they seem like they are asking a bit too much (and I surely don't have that much time to help that much). For example, for Calculus BC, my friend wants me to actually "tutor" him and do the hw together because he isn't as good as math as I am. I would be almost done while he is just starting. What should I tell him if I have no time?</p>

<p>I have a solutions guide online for the textbook but I'm not sure if I should let him have access to it. Are there any cons about having a friend have the solutions guide, answers to your homework, or anything else that you have done out of your own effort? I let my friend borrow my homework everyday and I surely don't care but will it have a negative impact on myself?</p>

<p>Basically, my question is: to what extent should you help your friends?</p>

<p>I think it really depends on your situation. If helping the other person hurts your grade because it takes your time, etc, then I personally would not do it. Of course, by boosting the other person's grade, you are increasing their class rank, which could theoretically hurt you.
I don't know. My school is very competitive, but we all help each other a lot. It's the only way to survive sometimes.
You should help your friends to the extent that you are comfortable with. If you feel that what you're doing crosses a line or takes away from time you need for other things, tell him that. There are other places he can go for tutoring and he should understand.</p>

<p>^Completly concur. Couldn't have wrote it better.</p>

<p>It sounds like you are uncomfortable with where you are. Pull back somewhat, tell him you don't have the time. Maybe offer one hour a week at a certain time during which you truly will "tutor" your friend, but don't do the homework for him. Help him get the concepts and then call it a day.</p>

<p>At the end of the day, you have to loook out for Number One. That would be you.</p>

<p>Okay. I recentlly have had a bad experiance helping my friend. Well, he asked how to do this project, so I showed him mine as an example. Ends up he copied my work and when I got my project back it said "Your project looks similar to __________. Please don't cheat in the future." I was soo angry!! I'm not talking to him right now and told the teacher the situation so that she doesn't think I'm a cheater.</p>

<p>coming from the perspective of the person that receives the help, i really appreciate it when somebody helps me with my homework, more specifically, physics. usually when we enter a new chapter and i don't get the homework, i instant message my friend to help me with a few problems. they usually do, and i dont just do it for the answers. you have to make sure that the other person is using that material to learn.</p>

<p>also, i have my bros old tests in a different subject, and whenever we have a test in that class, i let my friends see it. i think of it as me paying them back.</p>

<p>if this problem is starting to affect you're grades, then gently tell you're friend that, and maybe he/she can go to a different person. that's what i always do when my friend says that.</p>

<p>Back when I was starting out doing research my brother was told to help me learn Mathematica. It took about an hour. The first thing he showed me was how to use the help browser. I never needed his help again.</p>

<p>If you're doing homework with your friend and showing her how to solve every problem, maybe you're giving her the wrong kind of help. Just either</p>

<p>(a) recommend a good textbook your friend can turn to when she's confused. Textbooks usually explain concepts better than humans anyway (or even teachers; after all, only the best teachers write textbooks). Make sure she helps herself before expecting you to help her.</p>

<p>(b) teach her the general concepts in the lecture, then let her solve the problems herself. Usually if you've internalized the concepts, homework becomes merely a formality.</p>

<p>The best kind of help you can give your friend is the type that allows her to be self-sufficient. (a) is preferable to (b) for this reason, but you may have to use a combination of both to get her up and running. Just keep in mind that if you do homework for her, it hurts both of you.</p>