My daughter hates her school. She just finished her sophmore year and can actually graduate next spring due to AP credit from HS and also taking classes last summer and this summer. She really is not happy but if she transfers back home to a university it will take her two more years which will be a total of 4 years. She will most likely have to retake some course in her major at the new school but should be able to transfer most of her credits. She was diagnosed last fall with Generalized anxiety disorder/bi polar II. It has been a struggle for her to function away from her support system (family, boyfriend, etc.) Any advice???
Many schools require that the last 45 or even 60 credits be taken at that school, regardless of how many credits are earned at the former school.
She may be able to take some courses at closer school over the summer or as a visiting student for a semester.
That’s interesting I never thought of the visiting student option. Thanks!
Yes I think that is why it would take her the full two more years to graduate. On paper it really doesnt seem worth it. but it is a question of mental health at this point. She is not good with decision making anyway now so this is just really hard. Thanks!
It sounds like you really just need to weigh the pros and cons. Can you afford two years at a university closer to home vs just one at the away university? Would one more year away be more stressful than two more years with her support network near by?
It doesn’t sound like there’s a clear cut right and wrong answer, but rather what is the better of two options.
Can she take a leave of absence from her current college now and then with the advantage of some breathing room figure out what she wants to do? And if she takes a year off to work locally and live at home- might that be the break she needs to then go back and finish up?
Would she be living at home if she transferred to the local? That would minimize the monetary hit. Also, maybe she would benefit from having a full, typical four years of college, rather than the rushed whirl to graduate early. Was there an agreement that she had to graduate early?
Just some thoughts to consider.
Being close to her support system is everything. Even if she can graduate a year early from her current U,the mental health costs might be too high. If she is okay with going to the school near her home for another two years (and really, this is the usual length of a college degree) and if you don’t mind paying for it, she should absolutely do this.
She could live at home as the university is very close by. That would make a difference in the monetary part of it. There is no agreement for her to graduate early we just found out that it was possible. However, she will need to take a full 15 credits both fall and spring. This summer she is taking 10 credits. In my opinion she is rushing this and I think its because she wants out of the school. I am just worried that she will continue to struggle next school year and that will not be good for her mental health or the grades. I am just fixated on the fact that she should make this decision but Im not sure she can. Should I way in on this or not as a parent?
I totally agree with everything you said. She has asked me what I think and I told her two things - Im worried for next year and also that so far til now she has been thinking with her brain and not with her heart. And she admits to making some wrong decisions. She recently, finally, decided that pre-med was not the route for her but she has pursued this for the last two years and finally realized (although very difficult for her) that the heavy science classes were not for her.
VA, would she hate her college less if she weren’t taking heavy science classes?
If she isn’t taking the pre-med courses, will she change her major? Will changing her major require more time in college? If so, then transferring and starting the new major in the new place might make a really good package deal. Also, she might not need the summer classes at all.
If she still hates the school after 2 years, transferring might be the way to go or as @blossom suggested taking a leave of absence and giving herself some time off. Was it the pre-med science classes that made her hate her school? Or something else? Does she have friends there? How’s her GPA? Taking 15 credits each semester and pushing to get to the finish line in one year at her current school might just be too much.
Good luck with the decision.
I have a daughter with anxiety…does she hate THIS school? or just is she anxious and hates everything?
Can you afford two more years?
She really hated the science classes but she also has trouble making friends. The school is just so large. Her GPA is okay but she is capable of much more for sure. I think 15 credits is too much. She is open to the idea finally of transferring since she now has had a blow out with her roommate. Im thinking that this might propel her to consider moving home and going to university here. We are paying for her college so I am really thinking that maybe we need to exercise our parental rights here. We certainly have a say. She is an adult however, with all the mental health issues I think we should step in.
That is a good question. She will have anxiety no matter what but I believe it will be less if she comes home. The only thing She likes the club she is in.