Transformation (Girls please, but Guys DEFINITELY welcome too)

<p>I need your guys' and girls' help. I am a senior right now...an Indian guy. I would really like to ask a few questions. The first one is, how come when you always want to become popular, people always tell you to act like yourself. Acting like myself obviously doesn't work all the time. It's not that I'm unpopular...I used to have many friends in India, but since I've moved here a year ago, I have felt alienated.</p>

<p>Now, I would really like you guys to give me tips on how to become normal. By normal, I mean, attractive to girls. How can I gain weight? I'm 5'5 and only 100 lbs. It's not cool. I'm trying to gain weight, play sports, get a better hairstyle, and talk to people. But I really need all the help I can get. Especially specific tips about how to interact with people normally, how to get in situations where I can be more normal. </p>

<p>Girls, I really need your help in particular. I don't have very many friends who are girls here...so I would really like to hear your opinions and suggestions.</p>

<p>Are you shy around your new classmates here?</p>

<p>Yeah, I am. I don't think I'm isolated because I have a shy personality. In India, it was easy for me to talk to people. But I think I have trouble assimilating here. People's idea of what is "cool" here is so different. You have to be athletic, wear cool clothes, and be a little edgy and mean (I think). I want to do all that stuff, but I really have no idea how (haha my parents definitely don't know much about this, and my sister is over twenty, so she has a life of her own). Could you give me tips on how to assimilate, or what you would look for in a guy?</p>

<p>My advice (im a girl)
-Lift some weights
-Play a sport
-Make sure your breath isnt smelly
-Dont go from an extreme introvert to an extreme extrovert.. just go steady..
-Use nice cologne
-Dont force a conversation. talk about normal stuff like tv shows and how much of a loser this/that teacher is.
-DONT TRY TOO HARD</p>

<p>(oh and that play-a-sport thing, only play if you are good at it or if you actually like the sport)</p>

<p>Well, whatever you do, don't change your identity. Sure, develop new interests, etc., try some new music, but it'd be really sad if you changed just so that you'd fit in. Just talk to people about everyday stuff, and be a little patient.</p>

<p>I've seen some documentaries where football players just eat plates of food and then they turn that into muscle (because not everyone is naturally as big as a cornfed Midwesterner). The problem with that method is that when they get older they'll just be fat with high cholesterol... the point of this? Don't do it, work with what you have.</p>

<p>I guess several key factors in attraction are personality, looks, intelligence, charm... just to name a few significant ones. You definitely should be yourself. Acting like someone else doesn't help much because you look more like a fake. Get to know more people (not only girls, but guys as well) by talking to them more often. Hang around with more people at break, lunch, or after school. If you want a lot of friends, it's all about being sociable and reaching out. Every year, I take a quick glance at the class roster and look at which people I don't know yet, and I try to make friends with them. I probably know about 90% of the people in my class, which isn't bad for me, considering that I knew only 5% of my class before freshman year started. Now, I am able to hop from clique to clique without looking like some weird hitchhiker. Be more outgoing and optimistic to your peers, so they feel comfortable around you. Sports are unnecessary, but of course, it does help a bit. I don't think a physical makeover is necessary, unless you have bad hygiene or something. Find other classmates that have similar interests, so you have something in common to talk about. My frienships usually start in the classroom, so get to know the people that share four or five classes with you, because you're probably going to be stuck with him or her for the rest of the year - might as well make friends, right?</p>

<p>Are you a troll?</p>

<p>No, I'm really not a troll, NBA Chris. I'd like any help I can get. I'm not naturally unpopular...I'm just still having some trouble adjusting to American culture.</p>

<p>I really appreciate your guys' help. I've already begun to find many friends...although most of them are from India. But hey, I think it's good to start with peopel who are like me.</p>

<p>Thanks!</p>

<p>don't worry about it too much. Just make up for lost time in college.</p>

<p>Just wondering, what's considered "cool" in India?</p>

<p>Is it normal that when I read the title to this thread I instantly thought sex change?</p>

<p>
[quote]
Are you a troll?

[/quote]

That was my first reaction.</p>

<p>What is a troll? I actually thought it meant puberty or something.</p>

<p>The weird thing is, you sound a lot like my boyfriend (he's from India, too, but has been in the U.S. longer) except he's 5'7" and barely hits 120lbs, but he is a stick and still eats a ton. He's actually a really shy person, you just wouldn't ever know because he's very friendly and can strike up a conversation with anyone - it helps him, because if he tries to go out a little, it will only take a few minutes to find common ground with someone else and he can just be himself again. Then, when he saw the person in the hall or something, he'd say hi because he wouldn't feel so shy. Also, joining clubs is helpful. I don't know, maybe some of this will help, maybe not, but good luck.</p>

<p>UrbanDictionary: </p>

<p>1a. Noun
One who posts a deliberately provocative message to a newsgroup or message board with the intention of causing maximum disruption and argument.</p>

<p>1b. Noun
A person who, on a message forum of some type, attacks and flames other members of the forum for any of a number of reasons such as rank, previous disagreements, sex, status, ect.
A troll usually flames threads without staying on topic, unlike a "Flamer" who flames a thread because he/she disagrees with the content of the thread.</p>

<p>1c. Noun
A member of an internet forum who continually harangues and harasses others. Someone with nothing worthwhile to add to a certain conversation, but rather continually threadjacks or changes the subject, as well as thinks every member of the forum is talking about them and only them. Trolls often go by multiple names to circumvent getting banned.</p>

<p>I know this is the most cliche` response in the universe, but:</p>

<p>Be yourself. If you have to change anything about you, that you weren't planning on changing just for you, then it's not worth it.</p>

<p>things will be different when you start college man. Forget about high school and look forward to the new life. If you can call that a transformation.</p>

<p>If you have to make yourself American to fit in, those people are not worth hanging around. This country is big enough that unless you live in some isolated village in Utah or Vermont, you should be able to find someone that has similar interests.</p>

<p>just be confident in yourself and reach out to ppl and say hi.... Unless they are *****es (and if they are, why would you want to be friends with them?), they would say hi back to you and gradually become friends in the end??.. lol</p>

<p>i came from Korea four, five years ago and experienced something very similar. the idea of being "cool" in Korea and US was so different. (or at least in my sense.) But I just acted like myself and approached ppl and talked to them(even though my English kinda sucked...i was brave!!AHahHAhahAAHHA. okay. I'll shut up.) I made some friends like that;) </p>

<p>I was so happy for awhile until I moved AGAIN!!! damn it. so i had to make friends all over again,,,;; which kinda sucked... but still, I'm having a pretty good time. and i obviously don't know everyone, but i know many ppl in my school now:)</p>

<p>just be yourself and be confident in yourself. that's my advice:D</p>