<p>Did/Will you fill the paperwork to agree that your 14 year old to, at the discretion of house counselor or cluster dean, 1) go to the Boston area (or whatever big city the school is close to) on a day excuse; 2) ride locally in a car driven by a day student.</p>
<p>Need your input so I can make a good decision. Thanks.</p>
<p>Depends on how responsible the older student is.</p>
<p>Yes to #1. Absolutely not to #2- you wouldn’t believe the stuff that goes on.</p>
<p>Yes to #1. Absolutely not to #2.</p>
<p>You don’t need to give them the blanket permission. I didn’t at that age and for my d’s first year but will be/have been less restrictive as the years go by and my d has proven that she is responsible in a BS setting and making wise decisions. Your child can still go on the city trip/ride in a car but you can send emailed permission to dorm head/advisor on a case by case basis. Doing so my first year, with so many unknown factors, was much more comfortable to me.</p>
<p>I agree with creative1. For the first year I want to have more control over her activities.</p>
<p>Yes to #1 and No to #2. </p>
<p>Which is no different than what we currently have in place here at home. He is not allowed to ride with other kids at anytime unless I have given my permission in advance. Which I have done so, exactly once! And that time the driver was a young lady, which I do think makes a difference at this age.</p>
<p>NO! to both - particularly in the earlier years. you would not believe some of the bad decisions that teachers make at times </p>
<ul>
<li>Gay teacher actively recruiting/pressuring Freshman and Sophomores to go on a bus to Bagley - the gay prom in Boston, or to the gay parade in Northampton without parental consent. This recruiting thing is getting out of hand. </li>
</ul>
<p>-Coaches taking students out of classes for distant athletic meets.</p>
<p>Lol you want your child trapped on campus! What the hell</p>
<p>Watertester: we said yes to both, but the actual need never came up. At PA, house counselors are not very likely to say yes to day trips to Boston. Our student didn’t know kids old enough to have cars.</p>
<p>Toadstool: as a gay parent of a boarding school student, I am tired of the homophobic comments on this board. If true, trying to take students to any kind of porn theater is completely unacceptable. That, however, is VERY different from a gay pride parade, particularly if it comes as part of a broader diversity training program. “Recruit”? Give me a break! Would I try to recruit students to a life in which they are more likely to be beaten up, denied their civil rights, and generally have a life harder than the average straight person? Walk a day in a young out LGBT student’s shoes before you opine like such a know-it-all.</p>
<p>Yes to one, no no no to two!</p>
<p>BrooklynGuy, thank you.</p>
<p>Okay, I must edit (but the time to edit my post has past) and apologize, for having misread toadstool’s post. His post talks about a gay dance, and I misread it…my apologies. However, why is a gay prom objectionable, if a student wants to attend? I stand by my comments about recruiting, however.</p>
<p>I think this question is a little bit confusing.</p>
<p>Whether or not you say yes or no to number two, the child will do as he/she pleases. It’s not like there are faculty members everywhere watching your child’s movement. By saying no to number two all you are doing is allowing the school to get him in trouble if caught. </p>
<p>It’s like the horror stories you hear of parents putting their children on drug testing when it is not mandatory. If the kid gets caught on volunteered drug testing he is still liable to be DC’ed when he would not have been if he was not on drug testing, thus expelling him from the school for “no reason”</p>
<p>Just something to think about. Just because you say “no” does not mean it will not happen.</p>
<p>BrooklynGuy, I think that toadstool does have somewhat of a point about students going to BAGLY prom, it’s not the fact that it is a dance for LGBT people, it’s the fact that certain sexual things go on at these dances that younger bs students should not be seeing. I went to BAGLY this year and although it was the best dance that I have ever been to, if I told my parents about some of the things I saw they would never let me go to any parties again. In addition to the fact that BAGLY is for people like 22 and under.
And before anyone goes and thinks i’m homophobic or something, i’m not, in fact i’m a proud member of the gay-straight alliance :)</p>
<p>My parents would say no to one, two depends. They put no on the form, but if I called them and asked permission they would generally call the school and tell them that I could drive with a day student friend to a specific place on that day.</p>
<p>If my child decides to break my rules and/or those of the school she will have to deal with the consequences. I am not going to give her permission to do something I do not agree with, because I am afraid she will disobey me and get in trouble. </p>
<p>Toadstool: I find almost everything you say offensive. </p>
<p>Hockeykid841: How do I sign up for those mandatory drug tests?:)</p>
<p>I gave my daughter permission for both, but the need never arose for her to ride with a day student. (I put my trust in the advisor, who has to approve any rides.)</p>
<p>Other than that, I agree with emdee! And Brooklyn Guy!</p>
<p>the majority of BS parents say no to blanket approvals till senior year. Its not a big deal to fill out and fax a form for when the student needs it. </p>
<p>the legitimate reasons for a boarding student to be in a car with a day student are to go shopping/mall/movie or to stay in day students house for a sleepover, in which case you would want to talk to parents of that student anyway, so a form is not a big deal.</p>
<p>hockeykid – the 1 reason for a boarding student to be in car is to go drinking/getting stoned (pardon the old vocabulary). If a boarding student does not have permission, he/she may think twice about going, thus minimizing their chances of getting caught under the influence, a much more serious offense than getting caught leaving campus. Of course some students wont be prevented from this by a lack of permission form, but thats another thread…</p>
<p>Yes to one. Only on a case by case basis for two. Occasionally it’s nice for the student to access shopping unavailable within walking/biking distance.</p>