<p>Such good advice comes from the parent site. I 'd like to hear from parents who have ideas on how to motivate and elevate a younger S/D for the start of middle school. We still have 2 years before applying to BS and could use some help to get him to be more engaged. He does fine on tests, but does the absolute minimal effort on papers and projects. Generally views school as a chore. Good grades is not the issue, attitude and applying himself to the fullest is--I dread what the teachers will say unless he gets more engaged. Any help to have him step up in middle school with a sense of purpose, interest, ormotivation?</p>
<p>I think it’s really early to be thinking about boarding school. Have you asked your kid if they want to go? I think assuming that a kid wants to leave their parents four years early is a leap of faith. I think that if your kid really wants to go, he will get motivated. I’m going to exeter in the fall but my brother sounds the same as your son. In fact, he just plays world of warcraft all day. Were twins, but we still want really different things. My parents tried to pressure him to be more like me academically but he just wasn’t into it. I think it would be better for both my parents and my brother if my parents could accept that not everyone is into academics.</p>
<p>Might not be the kindof advice you were looking for but it’s my 2 cents ;)</p>
<p>I’m no parent, but hopefully I can help a little. I was like that in middle school, mostly because I was absolutely bored with the school system I was in. I made two attempts to accelerate in math, and the school would not permit me to even though they admitted I would have no trouble with the course content. Thus, the subject most interesting to me was essentially closed off, and I was stuck in a class far below my capabilities after having been told that I shouldn’t go out of my way to work hard. What does the S like to do? Does he have an affinity for numbers? Words? It may be that he needs to be challenged more in order to apply himself more. What does he do instead of apply himself towards school? Video games? Sports?</p>
<p>The video game box should disappear during the school week and Sunday nights. Try to limit the play dates they have with the other underachievers in the neighborhood.</p>
<p>I really wouldn’t worry too much about it - yet. Different kids mature at different rates and in different ways. And don’t feel that his life is doomed if he doesn’t choose to aspire to and work towards a HADES school (for example). The most important thing is finding schools that match well with who he is, whether it be BS or publics. There are kids who are super-motivated as 7th-graders and there are kids who drift all the way through college but become wildly successful later in life too. Love him for who he is!</p>
<p>No question we love him regardless of his academic drive and we’ll look for school that fits. So whether he’s headed for BS, PS or a local private school, we’d love to make the next 2 years less painful. He is strong at math, loves computers, and is very artistic and musical. Plays sports, does boy scouts, and is interested in politics. School however is a huge drag for him. Any motivations or attitudinal advice?</p>
<p>If you think he’s bored- too easy for him- you may consider looking into alternative schools- son attended a computer/math/science charter school that was right up his alley. It was also more challenging and he loved being with other bright kids who were socially similar to him. (interested in robotics, boy scouts, computers ect…) </p>
<p>If you don’t have a school like that near you consider doing some after school enrichment in computer game design or whatever interests him- then make continued participation in the things he likes contingent on max effort in regular school. </p>
<p>Just my 2 cents… good luck!</p>
<p>I have to agree with the last posting. Middle school was a drag for me as well. I too did not have the drive in school as you describe of your son. I did get excellent grades, however, it was going to a college prep school that helped me get focused and realize my potential. I think it sounds like your son needs some challenge, and maybe you should consider some type of private college prep school. There is no need to worry though, once he finds his niche he will be just fine.</p>
<p>Boarding schools are looking for kids who will be engaged in the community from 8 am through 10 pm (or so). So kids who spend lots of time in front of screens (any kind of screen, from the iPod to the laptop to the TV screen or GameBoy/DS/PSP) are at a disadvantage over kids with lesser grades but more to show for their time outside the classroom. Remember, the classroom time is only a small portion of the time that the boarding school has with your son…so they need to be VERY confident that he’ll fit in the rest of the day.</p>
<p>That’s why I agree with the advice to curtail “screen time” as much as possible…but I would do so ESPECIALLY during the weekends and other free time when there are no academic obligations. That’s prime time for him to be engaging the world – playing a sport, focusing on a hobby, playing an instrument – and will be the easier way to distinguish himself. These schools aren’t looking for academic whizzes – or “diamonds-in-the-rough” – but they are looking for well-rounded people who are academically gifted (enough to handle the what the school will throw at them) who will contribute to the community.</p>
<p>You’ll find it is much easier to bolster that last part and make more progress on that front than it will be to ratchet up his academic standing from “highly capable” to “extremely highly capable.”</p>
<p>Actually, between what Sarum says and what I’m saying, I think the idea is to toss out the game systems. Maybe not as dramatically as that, but at least set limits and then try to get him engaged in the real world so that, without you even having to make a rule, the GameCube gathers cobwebs.</p>
<p>Lots of kids play a lot of video games at home because there’s not much else to do. I know before I could drive I had no other way to connect with friends other than xbox live and facebook. So if he’s generally a semi-social kid, he’ll be fine.</p>