I currently attend Duquesne University. It wasn’t my first choice, but I figured that since I got rejected from Pitt, Duquesne would be the second best. However, I currently don’t feel that way. I really have no friends at college. I just hang out with my best friend who goes to Pitt. Everyday, I eat alone, go to classes alone, and study alone. I like to blame the fact that I don’t have friends on my dorm situation. I live in a dorm where not many freshmen reside and the girls on my floor don’t really talk to each other. It makes me sad when I see people in my major in their own little cliques and that I have no one to talk to. I know I’m capable of making friends, but it has just been a struggle not having any.
I was contemplating transferring, but I feel like I’m trapped because of my major. Duquesne has a good nursing program, however the school is just really expensive. I looked at transferring to Pitt, but Duquesne’s curriculum doesn’t include Pitt’s pre reqs and plus, they already rejected me in the past. I was also looking at penn state, however, the university park would require me to go in as a freshman. Additionally, my parents would be upset with me if I transferred because I know that they would feel like they wasted money on Duquesne and they told me not to go here in the first place.
I just feel so conflicted because staying at Duquesne is my best option for educational and profession purposes, but I just feel so lonely.
I’m even going through sorority recruitment in the spring semester in hopes of making some new friends, but I’m scared that it won’t go as planned.
I wanted to see if anyone had any advice for me, on whether or not I should look into transferring, sorority advice, etc.
I know it’s bad to transfer just because the social scene is failing me, but I don’t see the point in paying so much money for being at a place where I am depressed at.
Have you discussed your situation with your parents? If so, what do they think? Are the other schools/ programs you are considering applying to less costly? Do you like your major? Can you get a similar major elsewhere? Most people transfer because they are unhappy with their decision, it isn’t working out for them, and/or too expensive.
How can you be sure that the social scene will be better elsewhere? I would see how sorority recruitment goes. I bet you’ll meet a couple of nice girls.
You need to find a social life outside of school. Getting involved in community service projects is a great way to meet great people. Social life will follow.
What have you done to seek out friends? Have you made the effort? You can meet people in the dorms, in class, by getting involved in activities you are interested in. I also think that in you program you will start to see the same people in a lot of classes and should be able to find a friend group among the other nurses.
I would also go to the counseling office on campus to talk things through with a professional. You may get some ideas as to how to get involved in campus and help make your situation work better for you.
If you keep an open mind, you will find a house. If you accept the maximum number of invitations to return for each date, you are practically guaranteed a bid. They have a formula to get as many accepted as possible. Talk about positives for the school, things you are doing that you like, about how good your classes are and how much you like nursing. Don’t mentioned Pitt.
It seemed like you have sabotaged yourself…instead of thinking Duquesne as the great college it is, you are thinking “But it’s not Pitt”. You have no friends because you are hanging out with friends at Pitt. If you are not around, how cna you make friends?
You see “cliques”…but it is also just groups of people who have classes together…
Your dorm isn’t the issue. Are you going to clubs? Volunteering? Involved in the campus religious groups? Working on campus? Joining study groups? Those are all great ways to meet people. Transferring isn’t going to solve your problem. Make the most of where you are and get involved. There is no time limit on meeting people and making friends.