I’m not saying this to be rude, but you sound incredibly immature. Welcome to being an adult…you do things you have to do and should do rather than what we might want to do. Happiness is also a choice. You should read the book, “The Art of Happiness” by the Dhali Lama. Be grateful that you have the opportunity for an education and the intellect to be successful at it and “get 'er done.” Do you know how many people would like to be in your shoes? Stop complaining, being narcissistic and get to work. Obviously you are intelligent…get to work and do the very best you can. Stop making excuses, whining, and work hard! If you still find yourself soaked in your misery, quit school, join the Peace Corps and go help someone else for a year. Then maybe you will have a better perspective.
Just noticed that it should say were instead of where in my post above, but it’s too late to correct it now.
@Empireapple Actually, it’s exactly the opposite. I’m far more “mature” than most people, which is why I’ve never really fit into social groups in high school and college. I never wanted to hang out with people and do stupid stuff…I wanted to spend time alone and read about things that interested me instead. I don’t drink, party, or do anything that I consider to be a waste of time or a detriment to life.
I’m incredibly mature and that is why I don’t fit into the traditional career path very well. If you mean “immature” as in I don’t fully understand the way life is, perhaps you’re right.
But I’m disappointed that our culture, and just about everyone in this thread, has basically said, it’s just the way it is, you have to follow the traditional pathway or else you won’t succeed. Too many people just fall in line like robots.
I’m going to change society, even if that means taking some time away and then powering through a formal education.
@austinmshauri Yeah…since ONE of the classes I’m taking I actually like (Astronomy - The Big Bang), I’ll probably finish that one out. I’m doing well in that one.
The other two, which are really time consuming and boring and I cannot focus on, I might drop rather than get a poor grade.
You need to see a counselor/pychiatrist and talk it out if you haven’t already. Maybe being depressed has something to do with your feelings towards school rather than school causing you to be depressed. Based on what I have seen in my life, people who were very bright and who dropped out regretted it very much. It would be self indulgent to stop now. I dropped out briely at one point, and it was a mistake. I went back to school and finished. I even got my Master’s. Some classes were boring and some weren’t. You need to tough it out, stop all the unhelpful introspection and just finish. WIth your IQ it’s doable. You have your whole life to read what you want to read. You cannot get the kind of work you want without your degree.
ETA- just saw the rest of your posts after I wrote this. My suggestion is that you do not drop out entirely, but continue to go to school, but part-time. You’ll be accumulating credits, but still have the down time you seem to need.
Good luck to you. It’s not impossible; it’s just vanishingly unlikely and almost certain to include some serious pain and suffering along the way. It’s sometimes possible to swim against a strong current, but many have perished in the attempt.
A question: Would you consider yourself to have a lot of anxiety? I ask, because often when people feel anxious they get the urge to 'flee" the situation that produces that anxiety. For some, being a student and knowing they will be graded (judged) causes a lot of stress. Sometimes anxiety influences many of our decisions. Some people avoid others because of it. Some people choose jobs that are “beneath them”, beacause of it. Some don’t experience life fully because of it… Just ask yourself if anxiety is at the bottom of your feelings towards school. I have a relative who sounds like you. He says that he didn’t need that paper and can learn on his own. Beneath all of that is a terribly anxious person who convinced himself that he doesn’t need to finish school. Something to think about.
There are internship opportunities at NASA, Goodard etc. Before you take a break, apply for an internship so you can experience first hand what it would be like to work there. Once you compete the internship, you will know if you should continue with school. If astronomy is your passion, possibly go visit an astronomy graduate department and find out what “work” they do. Are you interested in the application of astronomy or theory? You can be an amateur astronomer and still contribute perhaps with a science blog, teaching online, building telescopes, summarizing new discoveries for the general public. Notice all the latter suggestions do it not require you interact directly with the public, so being an introvert would not hinder you.
I’m going to go out on a limb and suggest a break from school while you figure out what you want and how to go about it. As long as you are a self-supporting, competent adult - it is your right and privilege to drive the course of your life. Success on anyone else’s terms but your own = failure (assuming no illegality, immorality, etc. of course).
I would make sure this is not anxiety related. But that’s part of self discovery.
Wishing you all the best! At least you’re thinking about what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. Don’t be afraid to get outside help and advice from trusted, competent, neutral people.
Take some time off from formal education. You can keep reading and studying whatever appeals to you on your own. If/when you do decide to go back to college, ask about ways to receive academic credit and/or advanced placement for the subject areas that you have self studied. If/when you do decide to go back to college, take a good long look at programs that follow a one-course-at-a-time calendar. That way you would only be dealing with one course at any given time, and be more likely to be able power on through those courses you aren’t interested in as there wouldn’t be other distractions.
I’d also encourage you to get a good evaluation for potential learning differences. A grades in courses you like and F grades in courses you don’t like is a big waving red flag for learning differences along the ADD line.
Are you studying physics now? What courses do you find so unappealing? You be a physicist you need to learn higher level math and that’s probably tough to teach yourself. It’s easy to watch videos about astronomy and physics issues, but please don’t trick yourself into thinking that is equivalent to studying physics. The famous college drop outs you hear about these dates are not working for NASA. They are by and large entrepreneurs and/or computer programmers, skills much easier to self teach.
Please don’t be fooled by your IQ. Yes, it is above average. But it is likely not above average for those working on PhDs in physics or who have jobs at NASA. A lot of college students at selective schools undoubtedly have IQs at or above this number. Physics is a very challenging discipline and the people I know in the field are incredibly bright. You cannot rely on your innate intelligence to accomplish your career path. You will need to put your nose to the grindstone and work and sometimes that work will be boring. That’s just life.
I see the biggest issue is a lack of a plan. The people you look up to who do not have a formal college degree often had a plan or were working towards creating something. I understand you don’t do well in school if you don’t like the class, but I think that’s where the comment about “immaturity” came from. It just sounds a little tantrum-like. I refuse do well unless I like it. How exactly is that being a “perfectionist”?
You certainly are aware of the things that you don’t like. Now find out what you DO like and figure out a plan to do it. With or without a degree. Unfortunately, a lot of the jobs/companies you discussed, require a degree. But, that’s if you work at a formal company (unless you are someone extraordinary who a company would do anything to get). You can certainly do great things without a degree… but you have to have a plan or a vision or a dream or something you are working towards.
Figure that out. If it means taking some time off from school, then do it. But it’s not just about being in school or not. It’s having a goal and plan.
For those mentioning anxiety…
I do have anxiety issues, but it’s specifically a social anxiety. As I said, I’m an extreme introvert and social situations cause me great anxiety. But it has nothing to do with high-stress situations in general. I am actually quite calm, cool, and focused in high-stress, critical situations, and part of me enjoys high-stress situations. My anxiety is entirely related to social interaction. I am very self-conscious and worry about how people view me.
I agree the problem is that I don’t have a clear plan, and that bothers me, because I fear uncertainty and I fear not being perfect. And right now I’m working long hours and can’t focus on school (I don’t even have a declared major yet; I’m still just taking quite random classes). I feel like I’m just swaying back and forth and not making progress to where I want to go.
So I do think it would help me to take some time off from school so that I can focus on coming up with a clear plan for my future. Talk to advisors in my career field, visit astronomy/physics job sites, etc. This break might be a semester or two, or however long I need to create a strong plan.
I’m not sure exactly how to go about it though…do I just not schedule any classes next semester? Do I file for an official leave of absence? I guess I have to look at the information for each and what is appropriate.
And then I have my loans to worry about. Is there any way to push them off until I actually graduate with a degree?
Thank you for all the advice; I really do appreciate it.
It’s only when you’re a little kid that you get to cop an attitude when things don’t go exactly your way.
Once you’re not a little kid any more, you should be developing the ability to do things you don’t want to do, lose a ballgame without crying, accept the concept that perfection doesn’t happen in this earthly world, and be at peace with “what you want” & “how it is” not necessarily being the same thing. Sometimes people become introverted so they have their own little perfect private universe where they don’t have to face those realities. You might continue to have trouble in education (& other things) until you learn to operate within these realities.
I think you have to officially withdraw from the school so you’re not charged anything. If you intend to go back, ask for a leave of absence. Once you’re no longer in school, your loan repayments kick in. You have a 6 month grace period before your first payment is due.
Take some time off, but also ask yourself the question, “Do I like physics and astronomy or do I really just like consuming pop science?” An honest answer will point you in the right direction.
Also, you contradict yourself in saying you’re such a hard worker but then don’t work on anything you don’t want to do. Hard workers do work that is hard, and this includes things they don’t want to do. Just think about it. Then step up, if your answer to the question in my first paragraph tells you this. If not, then there are many other things you could do in the pop science realm–for example, instead of working at NASA (for which you have little chance without an advanced degree), write articles about NASA (which you could do now). What are you REALLY interested in?
^^ This is an excellent point. There is a big difference between enjoying reading about science and actually working on physics problems.
You might benefit from seeing a mental health specialist about your anxiety and trying to work on that during your break from school. You should also consider perhaps doing some career counseling where a specialist could try and help you dig down a bit more into what kinds of work environments you might enjoy and what kind of career might best suit you.
I get what you are saying that people are pretty much telling you “this is the way life is” and you are indeed mature. I do understand that. I used to be someone who fought the system. Finally I learned that a lot of things in life you have to accept and do the way you are expected to do them. Just get your degrees and then change the world. It will be an easier sell with the credentials behind you. And you are very fortunate to have the intellectual talents that you have. Don’t fight it…go with it. But seriously, if you do feel unfulfilled, join the Peace Corps. I do sincerely mean it. You just might need to get outside yourself. Best of luck to you.
@redpoodles I appreciate you asking that, because that is important. But it’s hard for me to know whether I really like working on intensive physics problems because I haven’t done that for very long. The most I ever did was in my AP Physics class in high school.
Did I completely enjoy every problem I had to do? Absolutely not. I often got annoyed and frustrated if the problems were difficult or long. But, AP Physics still was my favorite class, by far, as I enjoyed the topics that the problems were related to.
I mean, it’s really science communication that I love. I love talking about astronomy and physics topics and I think I would enjoy being a science communicator. But, I do know that in order to do that, I first would need to learn the ins and outs of physics (including the math) and build that foundation of knowledge first.
But I also think a lot about my personality and how I don’t have a big social life, so I want to pick a career (and a JOB) that is going to consume just about all of my time. Because I don’t really “hang out” with friends; I don’t party…I don’t do any of that kind of stuff. It’s just not me. So I would actually prefer my career to be very time consuming because otherwise I might get bored in my life.
@pittsburghscribe I would definitely like to look into these things but I don’t have any idea where to find these resources.