<p>I’m not sure I see the benefit of a gap year. To apply to schools where she would get merit? Getting merit at a second tier school is certainly not a given. It seems she already applied and was accepted to IU which is, I assume, a financial safety. D has already determined she does not want to go to a second tier school and I doubt she’ll be happy hanging out all year. If not at home, the gap year would need to be financed in some way adding more $$$$. Therefore, after a gap year, I still see the same 3 schools on the table with the service academy and Wellsley moving on to other students if she does not accept but defer enrollment. </p>
<p>Blossom - In my public school, the GCs are too busy to “sign off” on anyone’s college application plans. They certainly gave my kids advice.</p>
<p>Good point – I am going guess that possibly the H was more involved in the search across the board, but now OP (mom) is not happy with the outcome. There is no reason that whichever parent helped with those online form and paperwork couldn’t have gone and run the net price calculators at all the colleges on the list. And checked the admission rates. </p>
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<p>A parent doesn’t notice a kid with 11 reach applications?</p>
<p>Sounds like stars in the parents’ eyes over service academies got in the way of a well structured college search. Either pony up for Wellesley (without complaining, as there was plenty of parental negligence in the search process) or ask her to start over again and do a search for next year with some matches & safeties that are affordable no matter what. GTAlum, I don’t see why she wouldn’t expect merit at some tier 2 schools. I don’t have the impression that taking a gap year affects that one way or another.</p>
<p>It still floors me that students can send out so many applications. </p>
<p>My STEM-centered public magnet HS college office set a limit of 8 applications max. One of which must be a state/local public system(SUNY/CUNY in my local area). </p>
<p>Granted, they did it mainly to cut down on competition within the top 25% of each graduating class gunning for the Ivies/peer elite colleges and because there was ~700 HS seniors to handle.</p>
<p>I think it’s possible, but not a sure thing, and may just meet the costs of IU (though I do hear IU is pretty pricey. This student was rejected/waitlisted at 11 reaches and I don’t see merit aid as a sure thing. Plus, she doesn’t want to go to a second tier school.</p>
<p>Second tier is in the eyes of the beholder folks. We don’t know her stats and we don’t know where she was rejected. Are we talking Vanderbilt/Emory/Northwestern rejections, or Harvard/Yale/Dartmouth rejections? And other than the mom being debt- averse, we don’t know what the “true” number is of how much the family can afford, and whether that’s out of savings, cutting back on living expenses, or selling a kidney (two of these being a little more realistic a financing plan than the third.)</p>
<p>Are there schools with rolling admissions, openings remaining or that she could apply for spring semester admits that better meet the situation?</p>
<p>I don’t pretend to understand the op’s financial situation. But Wellesley limits need-based loans to a total over 4 years of $15200. So the additional $15000 in loans the op is talking about must be because the family choses additional loans as a way of meeting their EFC.</p>
<p>No more than the bank teller notices what I spend my money on. I think you’re dreaming to think that the average public high school GC has the bandwidth to think about any given student in any detail. They are transcript-stampers.</p>
<p>The OP indicated that they had the money in investments, and that she didn’t want to pay capital gains by selling those investments to pay tuition. Presumably, these are not retirement funds, since I don’t think W would expect those to be liquidated. </p>
<p>The question regarding other kids to educate is very relevant, but we don’t know the answer to that.</p>
<p>If the only non-service academy school that accepted the D was IU, after a gap year she would likely have to go to that level or below to get significant merit aid. She would be applying in a few months, and it is difficult to imagine what she could do in that time to significantly strengthen her application. Or, if she has the stats, one of the schools with guaranteed stats/awards, such as Alabama. Whether any of those schools would mesh with her ambitions is another matter. Certainly not as much as Wellesley.</p>
<p>It’s not for me to count or spend other people’s money, but throwing away an opportunity like Wellesley seems like a real shame. I don’t get the sense this is a family at the economic edge, and W is about as good as it gets.</p>
<p>They are indeed transcript stampers for the vast majority of their students who apply to their local state college, the flagship, and a private or two. This kid- outstanding enough to get accepted to the USAFA didn’t warrant the attention of the HS guidance counselor? I’m not buying it. 12 applications plus three service academies is an awful lot of GC time (even if it’s only standing at the Xerox machine) to have not noticed “Hey, nothing between West Point (a crap shoot by anyone’s math), Harvard and IU?”</p>
<p>Blossom,
I think it is possible that this kid was not on the guidance counselor’s radar. I know one neighbor’s kid who goes to a public school that’s supposed to be one of the best in the area. Her kid was pretty high profile-multiple leadership positions, etc, excellent class rank, but GC did not know her, ignored deadlines for apps, etc. Parents got someone else besides GC to write counselor letter. As far as I could tell, the GC did not give ANY advice regarding the application list or its suitability. The family overreached based on kid’s stats, but did have a good in state option. This is in a class of about 500 kids. My kid went to a private with great college counseling, so it’s been a real eye opener to me when I hear the experiences of friends whose kids go to other schools.</p>
<p>“But if she’s not dying to be an officer, I don’t think you can make her. Being a military officer is either in your blood or it’s not, IMO.” - Pizzagirl</p>
<p>I have tremendous respect for Wellesley. Its academics are top-notch, and it’s also very clear from talking to admissions officers there that its alumnae network is very strong and very loyal, and this opens a lot of doors for Wellesley grads.</p>
<p>I also have a lot of respect for the service academies, but I would never push a child of mine to attend one if she were not absolutely 100% committed to stay the course. It’s not just a commitment to attend a particular college, it’s buying into an entire culture of military service, and an expectation that this is your career, for at least a period of time. And by all accounts, it’s a grueling experience. I’d also note that the Air Force Academy, in particular, has a fairly high washout rate: its 6-year graduation rate is listed at 77%, the lowest for any top-50 LAC, which compares unfavorably to West Point at 83% and the Naval Academy at 90%. I’d have grave doubts about the wisdom of encouraging someone who was having serious reservations to attend any school where roughly 1 in 4 freshmen don’t complete their education; much less a school where they were signing on not just for 4 years of education but for 8 or 9 years of a program that includes, in addition to a rigorous education, equally rigorous physical training, military discipline, deep traditions of hazing, and military service. That just sounds like setting her up for failure. If she’s gung-ho to do it, then by all means; I respect her for it, I wish her every success, and I thank her sincerely for her service to our country. But don’t drag her into it if she’s not sure.</p>
<p>“My husband is the biggest pushover. Truly, if she had decided on a college on Mars, he would have found a way to pay for it. I did not agree, either, that our daughter ran ramshot and applied anywhere she wanted and didn’t consult with us at all.”</p>
<p>LaBechtel, sorry to say this, but it looks to me like you and your husband have bigger issues than just the potential $240,000 being spent on Wellesley. You think he is a pushover, and you do not trust his judgment about how the money is being spent. You weren’t on the same page at all about your daughter’s college application list. I see a whole bunch of ginormous waving red flags here. It may well be time to call in professional help so that the two of you can improve you communication skills so that you can stand together as a team.</p>
<p>The AFA is off the table. IU is off the table (at least for now). Pay the Wellesley deposit to buy everyone a bit more time to decide about things if you need to. There is the possibility that spending this amount of money on a college education cannot be justified given your family’s other financial obligations. There also is the possibility that you are such a saver by nature that you find it hard to spend money on anything.</p>
<p>Remember, even if you do end up spending $240,000 on Wellesley, that will be over the course of four years. You do not need to pull the whole amount out of your savings/brokerage account at once, which means that you won’t be slapped with a huge capital gains tax all at once. You can spread the withdrawals out and time things to land in five or more tax years.</p>
<p>We see thousands of kids out here who don’t want to go to a second tier school, but whose parents don’t want to pay for a first tier school. Most of the time the kid settles for the second tier school. The OP’s D could do the same. If she does that, and is strategic about her applications after a gap year (with help this time around), she WILL get some merit aid at some of the schools, and will have good choices that are more affordable for her family. If the kid got into Wellesley, she can very likely get merit at places like Grinnell, Lawrence, Mount Holyoke, Kenyon, etc.</p>
<p>But I have a sense that the OP’s issue is that her H is not on the same page with this, and he wants to pay for Wellesley. And the kid wants to go to Wellesley. Still wondering, as someone posted earlier, if this is a stepparent situation – it has those undertones. Which adds a whole different layer of complexity to getting to “done”, IMHO.</p>
<p>They’re too busy to “do” anything about it. Blossom, as you know, my kids applied to top schools and gotten in. They could have applied to all top schools, or just to Northern Illinois University and called it a day – the GC wouldn’t have noticed or cared. They are ATM’s for transcripts. You ask them to dispense a transcript, they dispense it – next? Sorry, I don’t mean that disrespectfully, but that’s what they are IME.</p>
<p>Pizza, fine, you win. Nobody at the HS noticed that this outstanding young woman (I’m going to assume that in addition to community service out the wazoo, strong academics, athletics, and at least two teachers who probably think she walks on water) was putting all of her money into the stretch school category. Gotcha.</p>
<p>Does that change the current calculus in any way? She doesn’t want to go to IU, the parents either can’t afford their EFC or don’t want to pay their EFC for W which are the only two options on the table.</p>
<p>Let’s help the OP problem-solve here. Telling her to suck it up and pay for W is probably not helpful. Telling the D to suck it up and go to I is probably not helpful. And by now the Academy has given away the D’s seat to a kid who is counting the hours until orientation.</p>
<p>Next?</p>
<p>OP- if you can post a summary of your D’s stats (grades scores, class rank, etc.) and some idea of what your D loved about W and the other reaches she applied to, there are enough posters here with experience who can assemble a list of Merit Aid schools which would be options for your D.</p>
<p>No, it doesn’t change the current calculus in any way – you are absolutely right, blossom. </p>
<p>If this young woman and her parents aren’t on the same page philosophically, however, about a) what she wants and b) what parents are willing and able to pay for, I’m not sure that coming up with a list of potential merit aid schools is going to be a valuable exercise.</p>
<p>I mean, if the mother was (by her own admission) that uninvolved in the decision-making of where to go, it’s not as though she can come back around and say, “Oh, honey! Here is a list of 5 schools that my BFF’s on College Confidential came up with!” The daughter’s going to say - but mom, I want Wellesley, and dad agrees it’s worth the money. If mother had no input on AFA or Wellesley to date, why would daughter pay any attention? I don’t mean that meanly – I really don’t – but it’s late in the game to change the rules IMO.</p>