<p>unfortunately all you can do is remind her when she is able to listen, that about 9out of10 other kids with great stats are in the same boat. Remind her its not her!! its the system, the number of applicants, all of whom are qualified.
btw if you dont qualify for fafsa, they need fafsa for need based aid…how would you get need based aid? ivies dont have merit scholarships</p>
<p>Oh, that’s tricky. We have Green Cards. We aren’t citizens, we thought that not being a citizen may help our daughter be a little different. We will probably start that process over the summer.</p>
<p>Can your daughter change her visa to a student visa, now that she is heading to college? That way she may be able to work etc.The rules have changed so much since we came here in 1996.</p>
<p>We lived in Liberton- just off the bypass. It really is a small world!</p>
<p>Tell her [‘Harvard</a> Schmarvard’](<a href=“http://voices.washingtonpost.com/class-struggle/2009/10/harvard_schmarvard_does_more_s.html]'Harvard”>http://voices.washingtonpost.com/class-struggle/2009/10/harvard_schmarvard_does_more_s.html).</p>
<p>I read this comment about this year’s admission cycle at Northwestern, which may also be true in similar ways to the top schools that rejected your D:</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Obviously, this can mean many different things were going one, something that can be debated endlessly here on CC. 
As a short statement, though, it says a lot.</p>
<p>btw if you dont qualify for fafsa, they need fafsa for need based aid…how would you get need based aid? ivies dont have merit scholarships </p>
<p>They would have treated her as an International student and due to our extremely low income she would have been eligible for aid. They knew she was an International and we completed the financial requirements for the Ivy Leagues on that basis.</p>
<p>My heart goes out to you, and to your DD.</p>
<p>Our experience in 2007…accepted to all the state universities, waitlisted EVERYWHERE back East. She eventually got of the waitlist she wanted most-and attended that university.</p>
<p>It is hard, when you consider some other students got into those schools with credentials that were not on the top tier as DD. However, she chose to look into the mirror, and know she did her best-and so can your DD. Your DD can choose to have No regrets…and be proud of her achievements.</p>
<p>Hang in there =)</p>
<p>~APOL-a Mum</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Again (not directed at APOL specifically) you DON’T know what credentials other kids have. You don’t REALLY know what their standardized testing scores were (and if you do, shame on you!) – you don’t REALLY know every class they ever took and what grades they got (ditto!) – you don’t really know what other ties to a school they might have had (such as legacy) – you don’t know the content of their essays or teacher’s recommendations – and they may very well have accomplishments outside the school that they just never bothered to inform you about. You can’t play the game against others. You just can’t. You have to focus on yourself and your own strengths, and not spend a moment’s time worrying about where other kids get in or don’t.</p>
<p>I was worried about my daughter’s not getting in to her ED choice, Dec. '09–worried because it was such a great match on a lot of subjective and personal levels, and we wanted that for her. I thought there were any number of fine schools that were matches, academically, but I was convinced (which I didn’t communicate) that her coveted school was ideal from everything from size to geography to politics to its international focus and, even, religion, that the subjective experience of her ED school could not be duplicated, elsewhere, as easily.</p>
<p>Flash forward to her getting in and my telling her how relieved (and happy) I was. Really, I just didn’t want her to be upset or denied a school, which she had assessed in the most personal (non status-conscious, no USNWR rankings aware) and thoughtful way.</p>
<p>She responded that I needn’t have worried, that, if she hadn’t gotten in, she would have been disappointed, picked herself up, filled out additional college apps for RD, and gotten the treat of knowing where else she would have gotten in. And then she told me shame on me for crediting her with so little resilience.</p>
<p>Your daughter will mourn, move on, likely “fall in love,” again, with the college she eventually attends. And, really, I think that if the rejection is alright with the parent, the child has an easier road to recovery.</p>
<p>It sounds like your daughter did get some good merit based aid to some of the FL schools. She should be very proud of her hard work over the past few years, as it has put in her a position to come out of college without too much debt. It has not been for nothing! My D was also rejected at her reach school, and earned a nice merit scholarship to the school she ended up attending. Three years later she is completely happy, and proud that she has “earned” a lot of the money needed for college through her scholarships. </p>
<p>Your daughter is also very well positioned to earn excellent grades wherever she ends up, and take advantage of all her new school has to offer. This can result in great recommendations and good opportunities for things like internships if her profs are impressed with her. Again, this is what happened with my D. She landed internships this year that would be the envy of any Ivy student (I am sure she beat out a lot of them for these positions).</p>
<p>It will sting for a little while… but once your D gets focused on her actual choices and starts getting ready to go, you will both feel better.</p>
<p>I’m sorry you were hoping for that financial aid. What would be the case for her in scottland? Would she be able to attend college there without cost? Since she is scottish, and not American, this might be one way to go. Keep in mind that all of the top colleges in the US are tax exempt institutions which is one of the reasons the aid goes to the US citizens. Otherwise there would be an outcry and they would eventually lose their tax exempt status, and 35% of the money they “make” each year.</p>
<p>At any rate, good luck to you.</p>
<p>I hope any parents who are still having a hard time accepting where their kids fell in the acceptance game this year are able to move on pretty quickly to a sense of excitment about where their kids DID get in to school. It would be a shame to waste these last few months in a lament, after all that hard work. The kids deserve a little bit of a breather, now, and it will be easier for them if there are no spoken or unspoken negative messages on the part of the parents. JMO</p>
<p>My heart goes out to every kid that was disappointed during the college application process. Like APOL, we felt the pain in 2007 when D1 was faced with 6 rejections in matter of minutes. She was hyperventilating into a brown bag when it was over. I still remember rocking her to sleep that night, which I haven´t done since she was a little girl. At one point, she asked me if I was disappointed in her, which was the biggest surprise to me she would think that.</p>
<p>She did end up going to one of WL schools, but it wasn´t her top choice. She also wonder if all the hard work and sacrifices she made in high school were worth it. I had to remind her that she shouldn´t let college admittance define her and it shouldn´t take away her successful high school experience. D1 was embarrassed by her rejections when she compared herself with her peers in school. It really didn´t help the matter much when everyone at school expected her to get into one of those tippy top schools.</p>
<p>D1 fell in love with her college during the orientation week. She couldn´t have been happier in the last 4 years. She wondered why she even considered other schools. She is trying very hard to convince D2 to apply there for ED, and I certainly wouldn´t object.</p>
<p>D1 is graduating this year with a dream job waiting for her. She´s had the job offer since end of junior summer. She said it is her ED that she didn´t have during the college process. While all of her friends are worried about life after college, she has been taking full advantage of her senior year.</p>
<p>I just want to share D1´s story to let 2011 parents know there is happy ending, and most kids will get pass this and have a very positive college experience.</p>
<p>I’m sorry for your pain. Ordinarily, I’d say just move on. However, If I understand you correctly, she doesn’t have a place you can afford to send her in the fall. That must be very hard. </p>
<p>This isn’t over. How much can you afford to pay?</p>
<p>I know there were all kinds of protests over tuition increases in the UK, but is that an option? I remember UEdinburgh had a freshman year abroad program.</p>
<p>What to say to her?</p>
<p>“Let’s go get some ice cream and celebrate the schools you did get into!!”</p>
<p>My H and I feel only an immense sense of pride in everything she has achieved. If anything she feels the rejection more than we do. Like most mums I would prefer to have her nearer home but would have jumped for joy if she had been accepted. In our situation although the public schools are cheaper, she will age out of our visa when she becomes 21 and will need to go onto a F1 (International student) visa. At that point the public schools will view her as an out of state student making her 4th year much more expensive. So with some great merit awards from the private colleges they could work out cheaper over the 4 years. </p>
<p>Our next problem is that some of them don’t recognize her Florida resident status (even although we have been here for 6 years) and if that is the case she would also miss out on Bright Futures, which she is eligble for the top award.</p>
<p>There is one private college that might work for us if she gets BF’s and another award given in exchange for volunteering in the community. We won’t hear about that award until late April so some sleepless nights still ahead.</p>
<p>University in the UK was a possibility but she has her heart set on the US and to be honest financially we have nothing to go back to the UK with.</p>
<p>Thanks for all your comments.</p>
<p>Tell her not only did she do everything right, but she’s a wonderful, intelligent, talented, hard-working and highly accomplished young woman; that you’re every bit as proud of her as you would be had she gone 4-for-4 on her dream schools; and that with her intelligence, talent, and work ethic she will be successful academically and in her subsequent professional life wherever she goes to college. It may be disappointing but it’s not the end of the world, and many wonderful academic and social opportunities lie ahead of her in college. The schools that rejected her reject literally thousands of applicants with very similar qualifications every year. The rejections don’t stop those applicants from going on to great success in college and beyond. Studies show that the brightest and hardest-working students are just as successful in life wherever they attend college; it’s not so much what the colleges give them as their own intelligence, talent, and drive that make them successful, and it’s apparent your D has all these in spades.</p>
<p>And yes, the ice cream sounds pretty good.</p>
<p>Life is the journey not the destination… My own personal “string” theory is that there are people you are supposed to end up meeting in this life and the people your daughter needs to meet during this phase of her life apparently aren’t at the Ivies; they will be found wherever she ends up. One day she will look back and in hindsight be glad everything worked out the way it did becuase if she hadn’t met so and so something wouldn’t have happened… But for right now it hurts!! So take her to something comforting – favorite restaurant etc. I took my son to a batting cage and let him hit balls till he was exhausted. It helped relieve alot of stress…</p>
<p>2bornot2bivy - what a lovely way to think about her situation. I’ll certainly tell her that. </p>
<p>Today in Florida we have had Tornado warnings and thunder,lightning and rain all day. When she got to school today they had no power so were sent home. The power came on shortly afterwards but she was already at her friends house and they have spent the day having a Disney movie marathon and Wii games day, so hopefully the break from school and time with her friends will have helped to put her disappointment behind her.</p>
<p>Tell her to read this and cheer up:
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/yale-university/1114274-official-yale-class-2015-rd-results-thread.html#post12302350[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/yale-university/1114274-official-yale-class-2015-rd-results-thread.html#post12302350</a></p>
<p>2400 SAT (one sitting), 36 ACT (one sitting), 800s in all subject tests taken, 4.0 UW GPA, valedictorian, impressive awards, good ECs, and was still denied from Yale. It’s a gamble for everyone, seeing as the the acceptance rates at the Ivies are so low. The valedictorian my senior year of high school had taken Calc III, Linear Algebra, Combinatorics (a few other math classes I can’t remember), and numerous physics courses at USF by his junior year; he had also done extensive research at USF, BU, and MIT; he was a Siemens and Intel finalist; he had the highest GPA in our county (7th largest school district in the US) and 2300 SAT. He was rejected from Harvard.</p>
<p>With so many elite applicants applying for so few spots, it’s a gamble, no matter how amazing your application is.</p>
<p>Also, did your daughter apply for Bright Futures? She would receive near-100% aid (the scholarship says 100%, but there are some expenses not covered by Bright Futures).</p>
<p>It used to cover 100% but now the top award for Bright Futures is around $4,500 per year. She will qualify for that providing the college recognizes her Florida residency. Not all of them do unfortunately even although we have been here since 2006. </p>
<p>We have found the college application/financial aid experience a sharp learning curve : )</p>
<p>Ah, that’s a shame. When I graduated they had not changed the scholarship levels.</p>