Thanks for your opinion, but you know nothing about me or my “compassion muscle”.
Just an example of different cultural norms and their role in college interactions…some groups have social situations where a Tux is de rigeur, some do not. Fortunately for me and my finances, dress clothes were not an issue
“I went through my whole college career with no ‘dress’ clothes. I can’t think of any schoolmates who even had a suit till med school interviews, except the choirboys.”
My parents bought my high school boyfriend, who had very little money, a suit so he could be dressed appropriately for certain college events where a suit was required.
Very kind of your parents, PG.
I think today, especially for high school and college students, you can get away with purchasing just a navy blue blazer. Pair that we an inexpensive pair of khakis and for most occasions you are good to go.
Now I’m really confused about what the truth is. Some people say they never needed “dresswear” and now, you’re saying your folks even foresaw certain college events would require one.
BTW, how did you feel about your folks outfitting your boyfriend?
Well, I’m not the same person who said dress wear wasn’t needed.
I felt fine about it; it was a nice gesture.
Okay, fine. More support for the notion that people (and situations) are different.
Who ever woulda’ thunk it?
“Bottom line is people are different and do different things.”
Colleges are different, more like. Pretty much everyone needs a tux at Harvard, more than once a year. No one needed one at Haverford, ever, when I was there.
Really? What happens at Harvard to require a tux? And is that something discussed at orientation?
So, there were no black tie functions at Haverford while you were a student there?
I don’t know about guy wear, but my D definitely needed dressy wear at various college and/or off-campus functions when enrolled at an east coast U. Some of that she brought with her; other items she retrieved from her closet when home on breaks. However, I have to say we’ve always been dressy bargain hunters as a family. It’s probably easier for females to find suitable dressy wear in vintage shops than it is for men. It was just never a divisive issue for her, not then, not now.
Now, we’re talking little black dress. Every girl needs one.
Both as a young woman and later when a mother with young children I found many black dresses at vintage clothing shops. I agree, every girl needs one. The best compliments I have always received for clothes have been that from vintage shops (specializing in 1940’s and '50’s clothing).
If I was a poor girl heading to Ivy, I would spend the summer getting one.
See, this is where pre-college mentoring would come into play, so kids know they need tuxes or suits for certain schools.
My D just went to a senior function at her school where the girls wore cocktail wear. From the pix, it looked like most of the girls wore little black dresses. Of course, they can be found at many price ranges.
I find it hard to believe that poor people somehow don’t know that there are occasions where people dress up. Even in poor neighborhoods you can find people who dress up for church or religious functions, within the constraints of their budgets. Heck, the women in black churches - with their dresses and hats - dress up far more for church than does your average middle or upper middle class suburbanite! I’d find it believable in poor rural areas but less so poor urban ones.
Different schools, I guess. Not all Blacks are churchgoers, especially when they are away from Mom at school. I attended a midsize urban school, and I never saw any student in a suit except for interviews/choir performances (if not wearing robes). Business school guys always wore ties, though, no jeans. I guess maybe at big fraternity or sorority events, dress attire may have been worn, but I wasn’t in those circles.
I didn’t say all blacks were churchgoers.
“What happens at Harvard to require a tux? And is that something discussed at orientation?”
Harvard just likes dressing up. Every House has formals in the fall and spring. The freshmen have one of their own in the fall. If you’re involved in theater or your friends are, the opening night of a new show is often black tie or creative black tie. Then there’s final club or Greek stuff if that’s your scene. The formals attract almost everybody, and people wear real formal.
I don’t think it comes up at orientation, but these events don’t sneak up on you; freshmen get like three month’s notice before their first formal, and everybody tells you about Keezer’s.
“So, there were no black tie functions at Haverford while you were a student there?”
I was at Bryn Mawr, but no. I don’t think there are at Oberlin, either. There’s a long list of schools where they just don’t do it.