Ah, the there are many truths, and my truth is as valid as your truth and nobody’s opinion is any more valid than any other person’s view point, it’s all just one big relative universe argument. I have no answer to that argument. If any objective criteria for what a good education should be can be called “personal definition of fit” or as another poster put it " narrow minded" and lacking “empathy” then yes, Fit is indeed king.
Did you marry the first person who came along and make it work, or did you spend some time getting to know each other to find out if you were compatible? Choosing a college is like that. There are plenty of options, but it’s important to pick one that’s a good choice for you.
@Wien2NC - Okay, let’s say I steer the child to counseling.
BUT I don’t understand why the two (counseling and seeking another school) must be mutually exclusive. If the child is failing to thrive and struggling to succeed, then maybe both are necessary. I can consider that the child needs counseling AND a different college environment.
I’ve yet to see any criteria for what a good education should be that is BOTH universal and objective. So…yeah.
@VeryLuckyParent Seems to me you are talking here as if there is a universal definition of “fit” which there isn’t. And many kids are looking for places that will push their boundaries. Other kids aren’t. So be it.
But flipping it around: why do you care if large numbers of kids are looking at "fit’ (however its defined)?
I don’t really "Care, Care’, in the sense that it bothers me, the same way as say “a mass shooting” would. I’m just wondering if we are encouraging an attitude in our children to measure everything on a “does it fit” yardstick, and abandon things just because “It just doesn’t fit”
Besides it is a good intellectual discussion to have. Hopefully somebody will get some benefit after reading this thread.
This is a perfect example of the straw man argument I referenced earlier in this thread. I have yet to see anyone at CC “worshipping at the feet of Fit.” I have yet to see anyone at CC suggest that Fit trumps everything. You are denigrating a made up construct. OP, if you would stop exaggerating the opinions of those with whom you disagree the conversations would be more productive.
There is no such beast. You can’t even get universal agreement that the world is not flat!!
because if the school itself has nothing to do with the problem, then transferring just muddies the waters, obscures what might be the real issues, and adds additional stress to an already-suffering student.
what if the problem turns out to be a bad roommate situation? getting a different roommate is a much simpler fix than transferring to a totally different school.
what if it turns out to be a first-semester breakup with a high school sweetheart? transferring will not fix anything.
what if it turns out to be simple homesickness? transferring won’t do a thing to address that.
if there is some problem that specifically has to do with the school, then transferring can be explored. but if his/her problem has nothing to do with the school itself, then how does transferring act as a magic pill that cures the problem? it seems that it would make it worse by introducing the stress of moving to a new school, that may not create a better environment and may even be worse.
I beg to disagree. I have read so many posts on CC that repeatedly advice students that “Fit is the most important criteria in choosing a college” and they should pick a college “based on fit”. That by definition means that “fit should trump everything else”. Seriously. It is not a straw man argument.
I am saying “Don’t pick a college based on fit” Strongly consider picking a college on “whether you will get a rigorous education and will be challenged at that college” even if you think you will be a “misfit” at that college. It will help build your character and prepare you to be successful in life. Now obviously that is not the only criteria, but it should be one of the most important criteria to pick a University, in my opinion obviously. Others clearly disagree strongly 
I agree with many of the points made above in post 49. Also, the school is less likely to be part of the problem if a good fit was selected.
@VeryLuckyParent - absolutely not. There’s a big difference between fit being the most important criteria and fit trumping everything. Also, I’m not sure you could find examples for your quoted comments. I stand by the straw man comment.
@CHD2013 And I stand by mine 
In my world “Most” by definition means “greatest in amount or degree” i.e above everything else.
I have always understood “fit” to mean “the right college for that kid” regardless of individual criteria (as best as can be surmised).
Are we really having a thread debating whether choosing the “right college for that kid” is the right thing?
(I understand nearly everyone in this thread thinks we shouldn’t).
hey, here is a new thread that touches upon what we have been discussing here. how would you advise this student?
That sounds pretty miserable to me - more like a boot camp. I’d rather learn and enjoy myself at the same time - they don’t need to be mutually exclusive.
I think of fit as a continuum. On the essentials end are the basics - is it affordable, does it have sufficient depth in the applicant’s academic interests, and if the student has special needs, can they be accommodated? On the non-essentials end are things like climbing walls and lazy rivers. And everything else falls in-between - student/faculty ratio, quality of faculty, research opportunities, internship and career placement, that elusive student vibe, size of school, location, quality of food and housing, study abroad, sports, clubs, Greek life, etc. etc. Where the student lands on the fit continuum is a measure of what’s affordable, some basic research, the applicant’s academic credentials, and a basic willingness to be flexible.
As long as the student doesn’t equate college “fit” with a fairy tale happily ever after ending, he or she should be fine.
4 years is a long time to spend at a school where someone isn’t especially happy. Some have no choice, if they want an education. Those of us who are fortunate enough to have a choice will look for fit.
With all the research showing that factors besides intelligence (including, but not limited to, sleep, diet, physical activity, mental health, weather, roommates, seasons, and stress) affect learning, it’s abundantly clear that trying to “tough it out” can ensure a suboptimal learning experience.
What if Bob Jones University was a HYPSMCC-level college with a top-3 program in my major? I would consider the school a poor fit (and that’s putting it mildly) due to rules like mandatory church attendance or the university’s ban on going to the movies, listening to popular music, publicly supporting a cause the university opposes, drinking, premarital sex, etc. etc. Is choosing not to attend a foolish choice?
OP, is your first kid heading to college this fall? It will be interesting to see what happens with them, what if they have “poor fit”? Poor fit often has real impact – kids transfer or drop out. That is frustrating and expensive – I think one reason people look for fit is because college is both so expensive and so important for financial success today – a mistake has big consequences. If you don’t care about fit, then it seems like your kid should be going to their state university.
@VeryLuckyParent - you seem to be very precise when it serves your purpose, but don’t like to be held to that standard. In this case, your definitions - “greatest in amount or degree” i.e above everything else - are not the same as Fit trumps everything else. The latter means that Fit would be the only criteria that matters. Your other examples mean that it is highest on a continuum. They are clearly different and you are exaggerating the positions of others with the straw man arguments.