^^@buuzn03, I love your attitude. For sports, you really want to be recruited. My oldest played defense on field hockey, was a world class gymnast, fantastic swimmer, and top sprinter in the state. And had all As and 99%ile scores. But when her coach talked to Andover’s track coach, he said “We already have 3 of those (sprinters), what else you got?” He followed up with “she’ll have to get in another way.” There’s a lot of misinformation and misimpressions out there. The more we share our experiences, the better prepared students and their families become. They DO want kids who do many things. They don’t want kids who spend all their time studying and chasing scores. But there are SO many kids who play sports and instruments. You need to think in a different league.
@preppedparent agree 100%. There is a big difference between playing a sport and being recruited for a sport. You have to have what the school needs when they need it. Having coaches strongly in our corner made the difference, I am sure.
@preppedparent that is so hard to do when you come from an area that thinks you only send your kid to BS to avoid them going to jail. We do not personally know one soul who has even considered BS, much less attended. Even his teachers & our relatives look at us as if we have three heads when we mention BS. So, yes, completely at a disadvantage out here and now even more thankful that despite our ignorance, he got into his #2 school! I’ll be better prepared next time around–may even have to steal your pseudonym!! 
@buuzn03 , I thought you were upset because your son wasn’t accepted. I guess I skimmed too much. He has an acceptance. Congratulations! The school that didn’t accept him doesn’t matter anymore.
Thanks @twinsmama – I know I shouldn’t be “crying over spilled milk” which I’m really not. Again, I’m just a very analytical person and tend to dissect until I understand. I didn’t understand the numerous WLs…starting to, with everyone’s input. And I am a planner, so trying to figure out how to approach differently the next time we have to do this…because I still don’t think sibling will be as strong a candidate. Eeek
Didn’t your son get waitlisted at a lot of places? I definitely think the need for FA put you in a very competitive basket. I don’t think there was anything wrong with your son otherwise he wouldn’t be waitlisted so many places.
I don’t think most BS kids entering in 9th grade are expected to be starting varsity athletes let alone world class, especially boys who aren’t matured physically. Believe me, BS isn’t comprised of Carnegie Hall musicians and future olympic athletes.
Bottom line, don’t be too analytical about it because you just aren’t going to know.
Thanks @doschicos He was waitlisted at 9 schools And rejected at 2. And speaking of FA, although we applied, I never indicated we had to have it to attend (I thought it didn’t hurt to try–I guess another rookie mistake?) in fact, I never mentioned it as I have heard some suggested to do if it was a make or break point. So, I guess next time we should not apply for FA to increase acceptance chances? So much to figure out!
Last year my daughter had 13 rejections, 3 waiting lists, and 2 acceptances, one BS and one JBS. She was well rounded in all subjects, sports, music and art. She had 97% SSAT, enough community college credits spread on art, humanity and science for Junior transfer, 3.9+ college gpa, two main sports, and exhibited on 5 national juried shows with adults artists.
She is having a great time as a 9th grader at Grier school, and no other school matters now. BS are not as rich as colleges, and every FA $ they spend means a great deal for them, as well as for you. Your son is very lucky and I congratulate as it is a great outcome for your family!
Here’s my speculation I’d like posters to confirm or reject based on their experience and observations. If you are a good student (let’s say 85%+ SSAT and 3.75+ GPA), have a life other than studying, and not a weirdo (can hold a conversation and reasonably reasonable), with a wide enough net cast most likelyyou can get an acceptance in a school with an acceptance rate of 25-30%, IF you are applying to 9th or 10th grade and DO NOT need FA. Same student, if applying for 11th grade admission, outcomes would be more uncertain as not all schools accept new 11th graders and the ones that do only have very limited spots. If you do need FA, “all bets are off”. You apply and pray, so to speak. Good students that can commit full pay for 3+ years is that hot commodity.
@buuzn03 Is your son an applicant for 11th grade?
No. He was 9th
Is I guess, lol. He is 9th
Meant to say “…with a wide enough net cast most likely you can get at least an acceptance in a school with an acceptance rate of 25-30% range”. Schools with admit rates lower than 20% become lotteries to all but a few. So you know to what direction your “wide net” should be cast…
@panpacific I would agree that such a kid can likely get accepted at a school in that range with those qualifications if they apply to enough of them. I don’t think that the chances of a single school in that range accepting that student would be more likely than not. The kid you define is entirely average in every way.
this was our first experience applying to bs for 11th grade and did it all without the wisdom found on this forum so made many mistakes: only applied to 3 schools, asked for FA, applied in mid January. No surprise that we got 2 rejections and 1 acceptance with no FA, but we are thrilled to get an acceptance considering the limited spots for 11th grade.
Count your blessings & congrats! This is about the kids. Life is unfair & so many great kids don’t get accepted anywhere – getting into any school is a great honor, being able to attend is a blessing. Please be mindful of placing rankings (#2 school) in the conversation – don’t send your kid off to school with that baggage.
And so many great kids don’t get the chance to apply as private schools are too much luxury to even think about.
I think needing FA is the biggest hurdle to overcome. My kid too had good grades. Good SSAT scores, great SAT scores as a 7th grader. Boy Scout, debater, URM, UR state, first chair in his instrument in middle school. He is currently on the varsity team in his sport as a 9th grader at his boarding school. He was still rejected or waitlisted at most schools he applied to. All those “hooks” are only hooks when you are FP. They don’t seem to mean much if you need FA.
Consider this: Many (the majority?) of boarding schools are concentrated in NE and mid Atlantic area. These areas happen to have a great many excellent day schools and public schools. Since most families are only willing to send their 14-15 year olds to schools relatively close to home, the major customers of these BSs are from NE/mid Atlantic. Families that can afford and are willing to pay the expensive BS and Also have a good student are limited. I’d say outside the “top 10”, a good full pay student as I described earlier would have a serious shot in any school. Of course, it doesn’t mean every school will accept them, but it’s unlikely that by Fall, they couldn’t find a decent school to attend.
@Golfgr8 I’m hoping that when I say #2 school it is realized that I’m saying that as a positive, not as a disappointment. Especially since we knew all along his #1 was a long shot with the lowest acceptance rate in the country. We are thrilled with #2! #12, well, yeah that may have different connotations entirely and I would most likely have needed an attitude check. I’m just trying to wrap my head around the whole process and see if I can gleen why he wasn’t more attractive and learn from mistakes we made this time for the next kid. Sure, I am still licking wounds, so to speak, but from the unexpected turnout and seeing some posts from people who were accepted to same schools without sports or ECs and with scores half of what he had. Not to take anything away from those kids, because as we know not to judge school’s by their brochure, neither should we judge the students.
As far as FA goes, all of the schools we applied to stated they had “need blind” admissions. Anyone care to comment on if this is just a statement? Or could my filling out the FA paperwork really have lessened his chances? This is the part I really need to understand for next round.
This has been a wake-up call/learning process to say the least. We’ve tried to drill into our kids that there is always someone better, someone smarter…this kid listens and responds by working harder to better himself and believe it or not, is very humble (I had to force him to list many accomplishments that he didn’t think worthy - even state recognition for his SAT scores). The second one tends to either meltdown or give up and do something else —which is another reason I am trying to understand this whole thing better, in case I am doing this again in 4 years.
And thanks for all of your input! I want to ask these things now, even though things may change in 4 years, because it is all fresh in my mind. I’ll probably forget and have to dig this thread up to refer to come next child!