A good essay for a college application would show a person’s knowledge and respect for literature, religion and history and relate such things to a part of an applicant’s life. An essay about conquering personal trauma like the loss of a family member, etc, are also other topics. Since most high school students couldn’t name one romantic poet, perhaps a STEM student would stand out by reflecting on what these poets thought about science and technology and what it means in the modern era.
Most science oriented high school students are generally unaware that the great scientists were also theologians and philosophers, so any number of good topics could spring from that.
The seemingly perfect valedictorian might be a a pain in the ***. He or she might argue every single points on quizzes or assignments. May email and call teachers incessantly on every trivial item they think they’ll be tested on. Might be campaigning tirelessly for leadership positions and then not providing leadership because they are to busy.
The seemingly imperfect candidate might be at home helping a special needs sibling. Might be reading novels for pleasure. Might be running an organization without any formal title.
Why do you have to be “really rich” to do that? Does it really cost millions, or something?
Do you really think a ghostwriter could write an essay that really reflects you better?
And, finally, do you really think that adcoms can’t tell?
There is one factor that hasn’t been mentioned yet that I think is worth bearing in mind. Unfortunately, it is something that the applicant has no control over, but can absolutely be the determining factor in a successful admission.
LUCK.
Yes, blind, dumb luck.
Something about your application just totally captivates a particular application reader, and maybe that person happens to be the best person in the room at advocating for their personal idiosyncratic choices.
Perhaps the major you are applying to at a particular school is having a particularly bad recruiting year, and your gender is massively underrepresented in the applicant pool. Boom, your chances just got a lot better.
Or some other institutional priority is having a down year, and you fit the bill - violin player, gymnastics background, whatever.
Most of this stuff is absolutely out of your control, and it might be the difference between success and failure. This is the main reason why some people advocate shotgunning as an application strategy - that’s really an attempt to take advantage of the luck factor.
How about if your essay reader really needs to go to the loo really bad, but wants to finish the current application they are working on and they are thinking they really want to give you a ‘4’, but then, they get to thinking that it would be unfair and selfish if they gave you a ‘4’ just because they were trying to finish to go to the bathroom, so instead, they give you ‘5’, and Voila!
“How do you know they weren’t exceptional? Did you read their apps?”
I have known this year’s group since nursery school. I live on the cross walk to 3 districts so I have friends in all 3. The district that does not do well actually did have an extraordinary Valedictorian this year, he was also an EMT, did Siemens, worked many hours to save for college and volunteered with the fire department and does not have parents who are overly educated (they went to college but work ar relatively modest jobs not by choice). He will be going to Vanderbilt, because that was the best he got into. Nice but not where he really wanted to go. The ones who got into the HYPSM this year and last were not anything special beyond stats. One is not even doing well got a C+ this year in college. There is nothing wrong with them, they just do not stand out in any way.
As for luck, I really do believe for many candidates they just went Enie, Menie, Miny, Moe.
However, some of what you mention is more than luck and the reason behind these questions like the OPs. Is there some magic formula. No but research helps. I know I did not do my research properly. I was recently told (DO NOT KNOW IF THIS IS REALLY TRUE):
For example, the Europeon language department at MIT is always underservered. People are not going to MIT to major in French or German. If you can show that you really want to be a French major (and have the ECs, travel or interests), then you might get into MIT with a 3.8 and 33 or 34. You probably would not as a CS major. Same for other schools. For example Penn’s SEAS is toughter to get into than arts and science since it is smaller, if you want a theoretical engineering major you may be better off applying as a physics or chemistry major. May or may not help but that is something that you need to look into. Of course you have to want to major in that. Many people are undecided about majors, they have a general idea but pick something only because the school asks, not realizing those choices are important.
@JustOneDad Near where I live, there’s a prep school. It offers crazy expensive SAT and ACT prep. They also have mentors with writing degrees who “help” you with your essay…
@BatesParents2019 well most of the topics you chose as examples are cliche. Everywhere I go people tell me to write about how I overcame a hardship. I just think itd be annoying for AdComs to read essay after essay about how you sucked it up after failing 4 times.
Then about the poet. What would a romantic poet have to do with the modern era? I do see your last point, you could write about Aristotle’s philosophy and science. (Even though all his “science” was proven wrong) lol
About the essay integrity issue - I have seen a lot of anecdotal evidence that colleges are well aware of the potential for abuse, and that they regard suspiciously well crafted essays as highly suspect and, at least in some cases, an automatic rejection.
Obviously, this is something that might unfairly impact a prodigiously talented writer as an applicant. Again, there is some unavoidable “luck” in the whole process.
@arwarw That is true, but there are also many valedictorians who gave the traits you described as your “imperfect” student. One Ivy bound girl loves reading, I think she loves books more than people. She started a book club because she loves reading, not for the leadership.
"He will be going to Vanderbilt, because that was the best he got into. Nice but not where he really wanted to go. The ones who got into the HYPSM this year and last were not anything special beyond stats. "
But this is precisely the point. Despite what people who are brand new to this country think because they’re stuck on how it’s done in other countries, from any kind of 10,000 foot vantage point there isn’t any meaningful difference between Vanderbilt and HYPSM. So for him, or his family, or anyone else, to think “awwww, what a shame, the poor dear has to settle for Vanderbilt” – well, it’s just ignorant thinking. HYPSM offer 35,000 opportunities … maybe Vanderbilt only offers 32,000 opportunities … and either way any one individual can only take advantage of maybe 10 tops.
You’re the one acting as though HYPSM is meaningfully better than Vanderbilt such that Vanderbilt is sloppy seconds. Why? What can you possibly point to that suggests that?
“Many people are undecided about majors, they have a general idea but pick something only because the school asks, not realizing those choices are important”
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with putting undecided. It shows an openness to new thoughts / experiences that is valued - especially because many fields are not fields that a high school student would have had exposure to (linguistics, art history, the classics, etc.).
With regard to professional help on essays: as someone pointed out, there is only so much they can do. Have you ever seen a memoir or autobiography of a totally unaccomplished person but written by a ghostwriter crack the NYTimes best sellers? No. Know why? Because it’s putting lipstick on a pig.
Do you think the fact that accomplished people employ ghostwriters for their memoirs/autobiographies make their life stories any less interesting or make them any less accomplished in their lives?
@Puzzled123 is correct. I was not talking about the college’s first choice of student who won intel and siemens and saved a rainforest. Or anyone who is an automatic yes. The prior poster was talking about luck, that two seemingly equivalent candidates, one got in, one did not. Sometimes the major you put down, which could be undecided makes a difference. Several months ago there was a thread about likely letters at Penn being based in part on major selected. The institution needs more of this type of major or people interested in potentially being this major based on their ECs and classes taken.
Pizzagirl, here is my “ignorant” and “new to this country” response (not actually a new immigrant (do not mean to offend immigrants, I admire you guys) and parts of my family have been here for centuries but whatever, believe what you will) , call me when the acronym is VHYPSM. In fact certain families are hesitant to buy in the district and it is known in the area among parents of high achieving high school students (most of whom were born in this country and are neither UMRs or OMRs if that matters). If there is no difference then it should take the same effort to get into Vanderbilt as Princeton, and Vanderbilt should get just as many applications and should be just as selective. Bottom line, excellent school, you were the one who said Vanderbilt does not offer as many opportunities, I never said that, I just said it was nice and the best he got into, and it was not his first choice. Maybe he wanted to go to Princeton so he could study a fusion reactor first hand. Maybe there was a professor at Princeton whose work he admired. Maybe he wanted to go to Williams because he could relate to the students on his visit and did not get in.
You completely missed my point which is that certain school districts for some reason do not place as many students in top 10 schools as others. This is something that is completely beyond the individual’s control. For any one person or any one year, having the top student go to Vanderbilt while his neigbors on the other sides of the district line goes to HYPSM is completely random, it may be the application. Having it happen every year for 5 years in a row, is an issue for the school district. The other effect is that in the neighboring school districts, #1 goes to Harvard, #2 goes to Columbia, #s 3 Duke 4,5 go to WashU and #7 and 8 go to Vanderbilt and Dartmouth and others that I cannot recall but are all top 20 schools (and I realize it could be #3 or 4 who gets in to Harvard over #1, that is NOT my point). In the problem school district, #1 is going to Vanderbilt, #2 is going to Vassar, #3 and 4 are going to Northeastern and BU, #10 is going to Union College and most other people are going to SUNYs or equivalents. Same socio economics, all un hooked, same ethnic groups. School is the same size and kids go to the same SAT prep course. All living with 2 miles of each other. No one can figure out why. For the record I do not live in any of the districts so my bourgeoisie notions are not at issue.
I agree there is some luck involved, but If you do your research up front and apply to colleges where your talents and/or demographic are coveted, but in short supply, and are then accepted, is that dumb luck? I don’t think so.
On the other hand, if you have a herd mentality and apply exclusively to the highest ranked schools in your particular field of interest (for example: Princeton for International Relations or CMU for computer science) you shouldn’t be too surprised in April when you’re rejected because there were just way too many applicants like you for too few spots.
I think this is an understandably short sighted viewpoint. The question is not why the perfect candidate did not get into the Ivy. The question is whether their college experience and beyond was somehow harmed. Maybe there are studies, but I don’t think there any reason to believe that these perfect candidates don’t go on to do well at what ever non-Ivy school they decide to attend and find fulfilling lucrative careers.
In the end, it is about the kid and not the school. Nobody should feel they have less potential simply because they were denied admission at one or more schools. And the flip side is that admission to an Ivy is not a get in free card to the career of your dreams.