Heard someone describe boarding school culture in the 80’s as “the wild, wild west.” If you have the insider’s view on now vs. then (ie. from going yourself vs. now your kid goes) what are the biggest changes in culture? Experience? Types of kids at the school(s)? Institutional values? Etc.
Bonus question: would you send your kid to the BS of your youth (ie. if everything were basically as it was then)?
gusdad reminisces fondly of the days when there were no girls at the Hill. Also, all meals were seated/formal, and when the school had breaks they weren’t required to leave campus.
I think the biggest change is the ability boarders have to stay in touch with family today . BS dorms circa early 80s featured 1-2 hall phones per dorm which were alternately hogged or ignored by the girls living closest to them. Your chances of getting a call in or out at any given time were 50/50. No internet or cell phones; 1 dorm tv which was also mostly ignored cause no cable either. You were very much in a bubble and parents had no ability or desire to be a part of what happened at school outside of scheduled visits. Our kids did not apply to my school due to different interests and strengths. We did not intend to send our kids to BS at all actually but some how both ended up there, partially because we are pretty discouraged by public school curriculums at the moment and primarily because we wanted the more meaningful and holistic education that BS provides.
I agree with both gus and chem… I stayed on campus nearly every thanksgiving break! So much has changed with the advent of technology. My school was known as “The Bubble” in the 80s for that very reason. My husband remains incredulous that there is a whole swath of movies that came out between 1984-1987 that I never saw and didn’t really know anything about.
I was required by my parents to write them a letter once a week (a practice that continued through college), and that was pretty much the only way they head from me (see chem’s explanation of hall pay phones). Today we text with DS on most days, FaceTime once a week. I can read electronic updates and see photos online. I can watch him play sports and give speeches on live streams. We are so involved in his time there that, actually, I have made a real effort to remind myself that this is HIS journey, not mine, that he’'s making his own mark, not reliving my experience.
And while the culture and values and traditions remain much the same, there are many things that have changed for the better, like commitment to inclusion and diversity of all kinds. There has been a vast improvement of the curriculum and rigor; students can now take far more classes in STEM fields, more languages, more history and english electives. And as a one-strike school now, there seems to be less of a party culture (call me naive, I know). I’m not sure I would have sent DS to the BS of my youth, but he is thriving in the one of today.
Oh wow! The communal hallway pay phone… who could have ever imagined having a personal smart phone would be the norm during the old b-school years?! I attended an all girls’ school (and it had never been a “finishing school” like some other place that fancied itself our rival) so we were a tough bunch of gals. I believe that now all the girls’ schools have departed from that “finishing school” vibe. From what I can tell, there is a lot more politics going on now (on all b-school campuses) these days than when I was a student. I’ll leave it up to people to decide what they think about that as have no desire to delve into it here. I have boys, so no legacy stuff to compare, but my husband and his friends often reminisce about “Lord of the Flies” sounding events (who knows how much is legit. and how much is puffery after so many decades of course). My kids went co-ed. Different times and different dynamics. Academically, the boys are both definitely far more challenged than we ever were at out very fine schools, and that seems to be the case with most of the b-schools now from what I can tell. We all tell their kids that we were made of sterner stuff back in the day, and will tease them about being weak and coddled, but everyone knows it is just joking and when the joking is done, everyone appreciates that the kids can experience boarding school, but with better safeguards in place and less isolation from their families (should they ever chose to actually use their personal smart phones and contact us of course.)
I’m an early 80’s boarding student. Phones is a huge one. The internet. Social Media, Resource like this - it use to be you only learns about schools from guidebooks. I went to a school that was briefly mentioned in the
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Official_Preppy_Handbook
That preppy handbook was on of the few insights into school culture. I think boarding school is viewed through a slightly different lens today. Many schools try to be much more inclusive then they did back then. I know as a BS parent I’ve seen less show off parents - I remember parents landing their helicopter on campus on one parents week end, and then the lets see who can publicly donate more money the MLB owner’s dad or the Wall Street Dad. I never saw that when I went to events during my kids time at boarding school.
Smoking is much less widespread. I think at one time at my school there was a smoking area for students that you could use if you had permission from your parents - although it was gone by the time I graduated. A ton of kids still smoked though (hiding in the woods) - it was pretty common. My impression is that Is that smoking is less of a thing at boarding school now. That may be because of greater awareness of the harm or simply because it is so much more expensive than it used to be- or maybe the kids just think it is gross.
Smoking is a punishable offense these days.
But apparently dip is quite popular. :-&
Again with the smoking… Lets totally trigger Photographermom… again. I could gnaw off my wrist right now.
I love that all the traditions ( for the most part ) remain. At my JBS, kids still stand when an adult enters the room and kids still have to do Declamations VII Form… which I think is very cool because it’s still a very competitive and unnerving exercise. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger… or something.
I do NOT like that many schools are doing away with or limiting sit-down formal dinners. For me… depending on the faculty member who was assigned to my table ( and what assignment I may have owed them at that time… ) that was my favorite time of the day… and it certainly wasn’t about the quality of the food. It was a nice civilized way to connect and recap a day with friends before study hall ( when no one dared to even whisper ) and lights out.
BS back in the 70’s was a little wild but it was contained. Unlike today… most kids actually feared their parents. Schools were very strict if not a little draconian- which made the experience that much more endearing . It wasn’t a real shock though… because it was ( for most students ) a carry over from how they were being raised at home.
The thing I loved most was receiving mail in my mailbox. I couldn’t deal with the long line for the phone. Plus, my parents were never home and there was never any privacy. Thankfully, I had parents who wrote letters every week. I saved them and put them in a shoebox. They saved mine, too and I occasionally dig them out and read them. I tried to carry on that tradition but my kids never checked their mailboxes… it’s not fun if you have to text and tell them to check their mailbox. It was supposed to be a fun thing… but that tradition wasn’t meant to live on. Oh, well…
I have to admit that I was deeply disappointed when schools stopped using soap to discourage bad language … I had the pleasure of having Dial soap shoved in my mouth once instead of the usual Ivory and it scarred me for life. I was kind of hoping that my kids would experience the same thing … maybe a varsity sized bar of Irish Spring .
A BS campus can always be physically improved or expanded but it’s the school traditions that hold up the walls. BS students today won’t appreciate all the things they may currently hate or dismiss until later in life. It’s almost like everything that was ingrained remains dormant for quite some time until it’s meant to kick in… usually when it really matters and when it does the gratitude one feels is truly overwhelming.
"I have to admit that I was deeply disappointed when schools stopped using soap to discourage bad language … I had the pleasure of having Dial soap shoved in my mouth once instead of the usual Ivory and it scarred me for life. "
How old are you, @PhotographerMom?! 
Never heard of such a thing at boarding school.
Old. 
@doschicos - All the boarding schools did it back in the early - mid to late 70’s. I think one of my potty mouthed brothers actually started to like the taste! The Head’s secretary usually had the honor ( lucky her! )… and back then you’d get a smack in the head on the way out the door. It also wasn’t uncommon for a " Master " to smack you in the head during class , too… Nowadays that’s probably a lawsuit but parents back then were totally on board! Hit him or her harder next time!
Hey- I would’ve signed a consent form for my kids’ dorm parents to whack my kids! Just hit him with a hockey stick if he gets out of line! ( They thought that was pretty funny… finally a parent with a sense of humor ) Yeah, just hit him! My wide-eyed kids just standing there… OMG, is she serious? LOL.
All the boarding schools back then had a Gun Club, too- even at JBS without a signed parent consent form! WooHoo! Could you even imagine how that would go over today? Yikes.
Siblings and I attended boarding schools throughout the late 70s. Never heard of it or any type of corporal punishment/laying of hands. Guess we chose the liberal ones.
No gun club either. :-??
You missed out!
Now I’m REALLY curious about where all y’all went to BS…
@PhotographerMom Gun club!! Mercersburg’s only mention in The Preppy Handbook of yore was a reference to the gun/skeet shooting club. It was a big thing back in the day.
Yup, @PhotographerMom, I had getting whacked on the head and gun stuff in mind (among a lot of other things) when I typed, “From what I can tell, there is a lot more politics going on now (on all b-school campuses) these days than when I was a student. I’ll leave it up to people to decide what they think about that as have no desire to delve into it here.” 
D17 and I both attended the same state public boarding school. The public aspect makes it different then and now.
The single biggest difference is the impact of text messaging and social media on integration. I remember my parent’s dropping me off and thinking, “I don’t know a soul in this town. I better make a friend fast.”
My D and her classmates kept in close touch with friends back home which while not bad, slowed integration into the school.
Pro/Con, they can coordinate Friday/Saturday night plans in a way we couldn’t but I think it makes them plan less. We planned or you got left out and were stuck moping in the dorm (remember no internet or netflix to keep you in dorm).
Too funny @judbeeski ! I know!!!
A good whack upside the head cured a lot of ills. Those were the days… Not BS, but all of my formative years occurred during the reign of school paddles with airholes to assist lesson emphasis. Where did all those paddles go? Must check e-bay. Anyway, I too, was one who told our son’s appalled teachers, “Do what you need to.”
@PhotographerMom: I’m looking at that oar hanging on ChoatieKid’s bedroom wall a little differently now…
Child Protective Services: Just kidding.