<p>im trying to be more organized and manage time better, so ill have time in college for academics, ECs, and social life. another big goal is to try a new activity that i have NO experience in - i want to take that risk and even if i fail, it will only make me stronger. also want to improve public speakin/being in the spotlight skills. figure i'll need them if i want to be successful. but biggest goal - to enjoy the next 4 years of my life.</p>
<p>i guess the facebook pretty much can create an image, lol.</p>
<p>I'm definitely gonna continue working hard like i always do, so I think I should work on my social skills. I have friends but I'm not able to have a total bond with them as I'd like.</p>
<p>before i'm off to college ...going to be ending a 1 year relationship with my gf. it's sad but i guess it will be necesary..because i don't think a long distance relationship will hold.</p>
<p>i'm definately going to try studying everyday rather than cramming once a week.</p>
<p>probably going to lay off serious relationships and maybe even steady gf's as well...just chill and lax with normal people. i also plan to avoid drama queens, high-pitched voices, and rigorous physical activity.</p>
<p>Yes I did that too. I'd love to have a gf but right now that is not where priorities are. That doesn't mean I can't have a little fun but a relationship is not the most important thing. I'm one of those types of people that can not be in a relationship and be fine tho. Single life is better anyways.</p>
<p>My goal: balance academics and social life. I've lived two extremes. I went from the type who is always at parties, hanging out with friends and neglecting homework to someone who stays home friday and saturday nights to study. I really need to learn to balance the two. Any advice on how I could do that?</p>
<p>Yes, find friends who are looking for that same balance. If your best friend is the biggest party animal..your going to end up dragged to parties and neglecting your work. So try to avoid that :P</p>
<p>Approximate and make a schedule. And then STICK TO IT. That is the hardest part. Like for instance I want to finish physics and start studying for calc tongiht and then study tomrrow too. After the test on Wednesday I want to finish my essay so all I have to worry about for the next two weeks is quizzes and finals which will allow me to get trashes this weekend.</p>
<p>I just remembered ... I'll no longer be confined to the short leash of a boarding school and will thus have a life. My internet addiction MUST be broken. Repeat after me ... I ... will ... NOT ... join ... Face ... book ... dot ... com. (As I sit here procrastinating on CC while I should be studying for AP Bio.) ;)</p>
<p>You will. Especially if you have already joined one site before. That only makes it easier. Plus thefacebook can help to be social so it really isn't like this site.</p>
<p>yeah I am not going to download instant messenger on my labtop that would be the end of me</p>
<p>not having aim...yah right.</p>
<p>You need it to get assignments and stuff sometimes. Don't pretend it isn't useful.</p>
<p>i'd try to limit my excessive time-wasting on aim, though.</p>
<p>I'm INFP...</p>
<p>but anyway, I plan to be more outgoing and not so shy around people I don't know!</p>
<p>fix my image as a burnt out pothead (I quit :))</p>
<p>I'm going to pretend to have scored an 1150 on my SATs and go around making statements like "Thank GOD for legacy." That ought to annoy the overachievers who feel they have a "right" to be in college. Actually that isn't really a change because I like to act dumb now.</p>
<p>and that makes no sense...</p>
<p>Let me start by saying thanks to RaspberrySmoothie for starting this wonderful topic, and thanks to J for anchoring it. Social reform in college is a HUGE priority for me. I'm a junior in High School, so college is still over a year away, but the more info i have the better. I'll start by telling you a little about how I (think I) am right now, then tell you my goals, and hopefully you guys can give me some advice.</p>
<p>So...here it goes. Right now, I get along pretty well with just about everybody. The main reason for this is that i never do anything to make people think ill of me (i'm waaay to self conscious to do something stupid). Unfortunatley, this is a double-edged sword. While i never do anything to tick people off, i never do much of anything. I have a horrible time engaging in coversations. Trying to to talk to a new person is like going into a mine field for me, i even hesitate to say "hi" to people i know when passing them in the halls. In short, i'm the kid that everybody is "ok" with, but that few know well enough to invite to their house or to a movie or something like that. I used to think i was kind of popular because i was on good terms with everyone, but then i realized, i was nothing more than an aquantince to these people. I was missing a close group of friends that i could talk about stuff with and hangout with after school. I'm pretty sure the reason for this is that i never make an attempt to get to know somebody well. I'm to shy and/or self-concious to ask people to the movies, or to confide in them. Yet these are the things that build REAL relationships.</p>
<p>I hope that gave you a decent picture of me, i'm not sure i got my image across. Anyhow, i'm sure you've already guessed my goals. I want to have those "real" relationships that i just talked about. I want to have the confidence to talk to new people, and to feel comfortable being myself. For example, my cousins and close friends say that i'm really funny. Yet people in my school don't even know i have a sense of humor. This is simply because i'm comfortable enough around my cousins to be my "real"self, and not hold back because i'm afraid of what they will think of me. I really want to be the same person that i am around my cousins in public. I just don't have the confidence too. In fact, when i see somebody i know outside of school, i see myself trying to avoid them because i'm uncomfortable engaging in conversation. Others would instead go right up to the person and think of it as a pleasent suprise. And i think THAT is what will make more than just another friendly aquantince to people.</p>
<p>Any comments, questions or advice?</p>
<p>Thanks for saying I had a good part in here b/c I think a lot of people ignore my advice on here. And just so you know except for the afraid to say hi I was in the EXACT SAME social position at my school. Don't worry about it. If you're worried about how people see you, they might view you as a push-over. The first thing you have to do is stop caring what other people think. I stopped. If people took advantage of my niceness then I stopped the favors. Pick up your own pen if it is actually closer to you kind of stuff instead of going out of my way.</p>
<p>Unfortunately my realization of this happened senior year and I just said "wait until college" instead of trying to fix it. So as far as high school goes I can't help much. I just put my energy from being lonely into other things like exercising & academics (I took a lot of hard classes senior year).</p>
<p>Alright here's some advice (I have already given some on talking to NEW people and confidence so try to reread those) for your outgoingness. I was REALLY shy freshman year but I wasn't in junior high. You might be naturally shy but if you're not you're probably just turning circles on the inside to show your true self. If you are feeling that extroverted personality, then go with it. If not then my adivce probably won't work. Just pretend that you are around your cousins. This probably sounds easy and stupid and that you could have thought of that yourself but it isn't that simple.</p>
<p>Just treat people like you've known them for a long time (like your cousins). Just start up small talk with someone you feel like talking to. Get a topic you're both interested in (music if they have band stickers all over or sports if they're talking about the game or movie if they just saw a show you liked). So in order to do this, you must become more confident. Just try my confidence advice and see if it works (I know there's more tips for confidence that I used but I can't think of any so if it doesn't work, tell me and I might remember what else I have to add). </p>
<p>The third to last sentence sounds like my sister (she will literally hide). So actually I am not sure whether you are naturally outgoing or not (outgoingness is really hard to explain but it is explained well in this personality book my mom has and it isn't based on talkativeness so you may have to do some research to find out whether you are or not. [I will try and learn the name of that book]). You have to decide on that. My sister is naturally shy but now she doesn't appear that way. This is because she has been living with me for the past 17 years haha. So she has probably taken after me and used my tips (which weren't tips to her but just following the way I acted). So she might be able to help you out if you aren't naturally outgoing. I might have to think harder to give advice to a naturally shy person.</p>