13 year old characterists

<p>First, please allow me to thank you to all that are dedicated to the USNA and success of its current and future applicants.</p>

<p>My 8th grade son has expressed an interest in the Naval Academy (class of 2016), but the feelings run hot and cold. Not having a military background, I’ll admit I was a bit skeptical. Through many hours of research, several books and your posting, I have become a believer in the Academy and its process and have the utmost respect all those that enter.</p>

<p>My question to the group is, what kind of personality did your S/D exhibit at 13? My son, also my oldest, has turned into a slug that generally doesn’t express much enthusiasm (maybe better stated as motivation) for anything. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great student, almost an Eagle Scout, class president, and a general athlete (not great, but participates in football, basketball, and track).</p>

<p>I have read enough to understand that if he is to succeed at the Academy, he has got to want to go; it has to be his choice and I will not press the issue. Our discussions have mutually concluded with structuring the next four years of his life so that he don’t exclude any possibilities: take hard classes, keep the graded up, participate in ECA, keep his nose clean. </p>

<p>Any other advice for an expectant father would be appreciated.
Thanks in advance</p>

<p>I am just about 18 years old now, a high school senior, and very likely going to be a plebe next year. in 8th grade I played on the olympic development team for soccer, ran cross country, and played football. I had wild surfer hair, wake boarded, and played guitar in a christian rock band. I was full of energy. I had more fun being a goofy kid than anything. Honestly just relax. He should come to you and say that HE wants to go. I decided in my 9th grade year that was where I wanted to go. I KNEW I wanted to become a Marine and that has not changed every since. I cut my hair, made all A's, took the ACT, joined clubs, got my Mitchell Award in CAP. All of these things happened very abruptly. He will change if he wants to go to the academy. Give him guidance and encouragement if HE wants to go and help him along the way, but remember, the decision ultimately has to come from deep within him. When he is leading our sailors and Marines into combat, he has got to want to be there, not you, not anyone else. If he wants it bad enough, he will go for it with full tenacity.</p>

<p>Keep encouraging him to do the absolute best he can in school, sports, EC's, etc. Even if he doesn't decide to apply, he will have plenty of options. I had no clue about the academies when I was in 8th grade. However, I knew I wanted to get into a good college and get a good job, so I studied. My plans changed about 4 times in high school. Fortunately, when the time came, I had enough of a background to successfully apply (to USAFA). </p>

<p>My motivation for college really didn't come until part way through high school. As long as he stays motivated to do what he needs to now (i.e. get the grades, take leadership, and stay involved in EC's), his end motivations probably won't matter too much when it comes to specifics.</p>

<p>I wholeheartedly support the approach of taking the hardest classes in all subjects, and encouraging him to continue in scouts, sports, and any other activity that interests him. Be very involved in a few things, and look for leadership opportunities. By doing those things, he will prepare himself for any top-notch college, as well as the SAs.</p>

<p>Beyond that, there's really nothing to do, unless he asks for advice or help. If he really wants a military career, he will either find information about it himself, or he will talk/ask about it more. If he doesn't, he probably doesn't want it enough to succeed at a SA. JMO, of course. My dd (hopefully c/o 2012) didn't say a word about USNA until 10th grade, and wasn't absolutely sure about a Navy career until she attended NASS.</p>

<p>
[quote]
has turned into a slug that generally doesn’t express much enthusiasm (maybe better stated as motivation) for anything. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great student, almost an Eagle Scout, class president, and a general athlete (not great, but participates in football, basketball, and track).

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</p>

<p>A slug? He’s 13 and in 8th grade and he’s only managed to reach (almost) reach Eagle Scout, become a great student, class president, and participate in 3 sports? </p>

<p>As the father of 4 boys, 18, 16, 14 and 12 the best advice I can give you is encourage him as others have said. At the same time let him be a kid without the stress of structuring his life for the next 8 years and the expectations that these are decisions he must make now. </p>

<p>Half the people I knew in their 20’s were still trying to sort out what they wanted to be when they grew up. The best thing a parent can do for a child is to help a child discover what opportunities are out there; and then help facilitate some of the choices should they express interest. </p>

<p>The best preparation for a Service Academy is the same for life, growing up with the knowledge and security that your parents, your mentors, teachers and coaches, will support your choices and will love and respect you regardless of the path you ultimately choose. Your son will undoubtedly come to know and appreciate your expectations for him, but the choice and the path must be left up to him to achieve. </p>

<p>Lastly, don’t underestimate the capacity of a young adult to sense the subtleties of your encouragement, you don’t want them to say yes to things to please you when planning their life for them.</p>

<p>I am an 18 year old High School Senior and a Candidate for the USNA Class of 2012.</p>

<p>When I was 13, I had no idea what I wanted to do. In Middle School I got good grades and was involved in a lot of ECs, but this was sort of by accident and I was in no means thinking about colleges yet. Back then I think I went from wanting to be a teacher to wanting to be a doctor to wanting to be a DEA Agent. I sort of had no direction. I continued the same way in High School. It was not until the spring of my Junior year that I even thought about applying to a Service Academy.</p>

<p>I'm also a candidate to the USNA, and had actually never really heard about the academy until my sophomore year. I instantly fell in love- I had been looking at a lot of colleges and when I came across the naval academy something clicked- I felt differently about it than I had any other school and pretty much became obsessed to tell you the truth. Simply having the motivation to attend an academy helped me keep up my grades and ECA's. </p>

<p>One thing that I think is important to look at from your son's point of view is his motivation to attend a service academy. I don't come from a military background and my parents were a little skeptical as well. However, I did a ton of research; I took the initiative to find out all that I could about the academy. I think ( and people stress this over and over ) that the kid really has to be the driving force in the matter. It is great to have the parents' support- that is something that can't be taken for granted. However, your son has to want it more than anything, because that's what it takes. </p>

<p>Another important thing is to stay on top of his academics and extra-curriculars, but don't schedule them for him ( this is coming from experience ). I have a lot of friends whose parents were down their throats when it came to getting good grades and getting into that certain school. By senior year, the kid doesn't care because they have no true motivation.</p>

<p>JJ2016 - it sounds to me like you are doing an excellent job-and your son doesn't sound like a slug to me. Besides- a lot of things can change between 8th grade and junior/senior year when he begins the service academy process (ex: I used to want to be a zoologist, now I have my heart set on Naval Aviation). Keep up the good work, and best of luck to your son!</p>

<p>send him to the Navy Summer Football camp.
NavySports.com</a> - Camps - Official Athletic Site for Navy Athletics</p>

<p>This years dates are yet to be determined, but I sent both boys to it and it is well run, gives them a taste of the campus and is a real blast.</p>

<p>Excellent suggestion from xchefmike. Where do you live, JJ2016? Can you get to a USNA football game next season, or tour the yard on a vacation? Sometimes a look @ young people in uniform can turn on -- or off -- a kid curious about the military. </p>

<p>I agree w/ others -- your kid does NOT sound like a slug. When my son was in 8th grade, I was pretty sure he was destined for a future of exclusively part-time work, since a career would have to accommodate video games and sleeping 12 hrs/day. Now he's a plebe w/ 18 units, a varsity sport, last night was sleepless due to watch and duty hitting on the same day -- and he just made time to call to tell me a joke. </p>

<p>Your son sounds fantastic. I bet you're doing everything right.</p>

<p>hey, i'm another candidate for 2012. i've known i wanted USNA since 7th grade. since then i've been doing, reading, listening to, and watching anything that has to do with the academy. if like scubaguy said, if HE wants it he'll be doing all this sort of stuff soon, too. hopefully he'll get his act together soon (although it sounds like he already has, despite being "sluggish"). in the end if he doesn't want it, that's okay, too. let him do all the research and learn about the academy. throughout the entire process my parents had very little to do with it - mostly buying plane tickets to and from Annapolis and digging up ancient medical history. if he wants it that'll be motivation enough.</p>

<p>"13 year old characteristics"</p>

<p>I thought you were talking about the mids!<br>
which does applies to some, hehe</p>

<p>Congrats you have a normal 13 yo. I would focus on the tools that will make them successful in high school and if he displays continued interest then spend the day at the yard and take the escorted tour. Other options - Space Camp in Huntsville, Al (Aviation Challenge) between sophmore and junior year and summer seminar between junior and senior year.</p>

<p>Self-motivation will be the key to their success and that's still a few years away. </p>

<p>Leaning on a child to attend a service academy is no different than trying to force a child become a doctor. It won't work and if they stick it out they're not going to be any good at it. It's just too hard if you're not "all in."</p>

<p>Yeah, I've heard of cadets and midshipmen in the past who would drop out the first day and beat their parents back home. It's all about why you're going</p>

<p>You have an exceptional 8th grader on your hands, not a slug. In 8th grade, he really isn't into the college game yet. To him, the term "military institution" may make him a little apprehensive. Also, 8th graders hear an abundance of propaganda against the military in school, from the media, etc. When it comes time for him to think about college, his life should not have been structured around applying to a service academy. In 8th grade, I had no idea what the service academies were. I had this notion in my mind that all members of the military were there because they weren't smart enough to go to college. I spent my 8th grade years playing basketball for the boys and girls club thinking that I'd be a basketball star in high school. I made the varsity team in 9th grade and sat the bench. I took up track in the spring of 9th grade and ran every season after that (Cross country in the winter, indoor track in the winter) and became one of the best runners in the state albeit the smallest one. My times were good enough to get calls from Navy, Dartmouth, Tulane, Princeton, all kinds of places... Sometimes you don't find your niche until high school I'm sure with your guidance, your son won't be quite as misinformed as I was and he'll be able to construct his future the way he sees fit along the way.</p>

<p>Point being is that when his friends start talking about colleges, and he has good grades, committment in EC's, success in sports, he'll be able to apply anywhere he wants, even a service academy. He'll do research on his own about colleges, surely, and if he's doing a search of top schools, he'll remember that his mom had told him what the service academies entailed. My best advice is to just keep him informed about the options that the academies offer. In the end, coming to an SA might not be what he wants, but you can at least help set up his future by helping him become competitive in any college admissions game that he chooses to exhibit.</p>