18-year-old virgin

<p>'tisTheTruth ~</p>

<p>mostly that comment is a general one - the attitude is, "Don't worry about anything, just use a condom." There are very real consequences to sex beyond pregnancy and STDs. Most of my friends who have had sex outside of marriage regret it. Most of them say that they underestimated how it would complicate the relationship. Most say that they got emotionally involved on another level. Sex does bring your self-confidence, ego, and "you" into jeopardy more than you can imagine. That makes it a great thing if you're with someone you love and trust with not just your life, but with your soul. Horrible when you break up.</p>

<p>I talked to an attorney at work about girl stuff. She waited for years (late 20s) and said that, when she finally had sex, she regretted it. She said that she became emotionally tied up in him and insecure in ways that she had never been before. </p>

<p>It's just something I've heard a lot. Granted, not everyone feels that way, but, not everyone gets pregnant when they have unprotected sex. Condoms don't protect against heartbreak. </p>

<p>I'm biased - I have some pretty strong views on the matter (which only worsen as I get older and see all the ways in which people screw up their lives iwth "safe sex..." 40% of American women have an abortion in their lifetimes; 93% of them regret not having the kid; I've seen high school friends bear illegitimate children and then watch their lives go downhill; and I've tried to help friends who are going through really tough times when the sex makes the break-up worse. I've also helped friends through break-ups when they say, "I can't believe that I considered sleeping with him... I'm so happy that I didn't.") and really wish that people would have abstinence as their default position, not sex.</p>

<p>There's more to virginity than vaginal penetration. Anal sex IS sex. And for the record, I agree with other posters who said that the OP should wait until he feels ready and not rush things.</p>