<p>Hey guys. It's my 3rd week of class here and I've been living in the dorms since Aug. 20th. I don't really have any issues with my roommate or the facility accomodations. The problem I am having is that I am realizing that college dorm life just is not for me. It's not going to kill me entirely to push through this semester/year living here, but I just don't know if the stress is worth it. I would personally do much better having a living area somewhere that is quiet and in more of an apartment-like setup. The kids in this hall blast music randomly at night and jump around like immature idiots. When I hold conversations with my floormates I can get along with them, but many of them are just too immature for me. I haven't taken any action (discussing with RA or RLC about location changes) yet. </p>
<p>All 1st and 2nd year students are required to live on-campus unless they live within 30 miles (which I do) then they can ask to commute. Only a small number of freshmen commute. Apartment options are not available to freshman, only regular dorms.</p>
<p>So basically, my only other option is to commute this year. My roommate is a "friend" from highschool that I would kindof feel like I would be deserting him (and some of my floormates that i've hung out with) if I just randomly said "hey man I'm sory I can't take this anymore I'm going to commute the rest of the year". I'll probably talk to my RLC if I still feel this way in a few days.</p>
<p>ROFL. I don’t have a problem with sucking it up, I just don’t want the stress to end up ****ing with my grades. My classes are easy this semester and I can probably get by, next semester will suck. I dunno. There’s a lot going through my mind right now.</p>
<p>Commuting really sucks for a lot of people so I’d think hard about it. Dorming isn’t for everyone, but most people do get used to the noise. I can sleep through ANYTHING just from spending a few weekends of the year at my boyfriends, by the time I got my own dorm I was prepared to live right next door to a frat house that starts partying at 8am. :P</p>
<p>My experience with commuting was that I had a REALLY hard time connecting with the other students and feeling like I was a part of everything, I spent almost all my free time driving back and forth, I never had the gas or the energy to drive back up AGAIN just to see people, and living at home meant rules I didn’t have to contend with elsewhere. I was lonely, bored, left out, and got seriously frustrated living like a high schooler as a college student-- just because you are in college now doesn’t mean your parents have to change their rules for you, and they can make new rules at any time. I especially liked being forced to do chores while I was in the middle of studying for an exam or getting yelled at for skipping dinner to go to an EC. It was too much gas money to come home between classes so I’d have several hour long breaks just to sit there between classes, couldn’t go home and was stranded at school from morning til evening every day, had to drive twenty minutes there and back every day for class and on weekends for ECs. I got so sick of driving I wouldn’t have brought a car to campus this year even if I could have. You never have to be in your dorm except to sleep. So if I were you, unless you are so miserable you don’t think you can make it work well enough to get good grades, I’d try to at least stick it out a semester and see how much you adjust. People with no experience with college life don’t move in and instantly feel at home-- the ones that do are too drunk to realize they aren’t sleeping as well as they are used to or as relaxed as they normally are.</p>
<p>And around here, it quiets down a fair amount once it starts to get cold out and after the first exams. I don’t know about my school yet because I just transferred in and this is my first year here, but the other ones in the area aren’t nearly as bad in the winter as they are in the fall, and MOST of the school year is cold unless you live in a warm climate.</p>
<p>Is there anyway you can switch halls and live in maybe a single or a more apartment-style one? If not this semester then see if you can switch next semester. </p>
<p>I don’t blame you, if I were in that kind of atmosphere I would want to get out. No way would I want to waste that much money on that kind of living.</p>
<p>Yeah I think I’ll try to stick it out for the semester… hopefully. The commute here really isn’t bad, only a half hour. Gas money is cheaper than room charges. Schedule isn’t too much of a problem as all classes here are between 8am and 4pm. I dunno… ugh. I drove everyday to HS (albeit only a 10 minute drive) and to some Community College classes (20 minutes). I really don’t mind driving, in fact I actually like the alone time - something that I really miss with living here, the complete lack of privacy. I’ve been to camps and tent-camped for weeks at a time with people I barely knew and didn’t have a problem with it. Dorm life is just completely different, and I just flat out feel uncomfortable 90% of each day.</p>
<p>October47, 95% of the kids here seem to love it. I don’t know if it is just false emotions or what, but they seem to be having a good time. I’ve heard so many great things about the dorms here, but I guess it’s just not for me. I really do not know what to do. I feel like if I move out everyone will think i’m an idiot/anti-social/■■■■■.</p>
<p>^ a 30 minute commute isn’t bad. That’s about what I drive to my community college. It’s a lot better than having to put up with a crappy dorm room environment. </p>
<p>Don’t worry about what they think. If you only live 30 minutes away you can still go to games, events, club meetings, etc. Plus if they make you feel so uncomfortable being around them is it really worth it to suck it up and deal with this crap just so they won’t think that about you?</p>
<p>A half hour commute SUCKS when the weather is bad, traffic is bad, you are tired, or you have an exam. I loved driving until my second year of community college. When it snows a half hour commute becomes a 45 minute to an hour commute, and if there is an accident on the expressway you are screwed.</p>
<p>For me, a lump sum of dorm money that could be paid for in loans if necessary was much more affordable than $20-$80 dollars of gas a week, gas prices shoot up in the middle of the summer and then for most of winter. My parents paid for it at first but didn’t agree with my social needs or that I needed to make an extra trip for tutoring and started rationing my gas. That was special. If you have your own car that is literally your own and can afford as much gas as you want by yourself you are golden, but my parents got really tired of having their adult child in the house a year after me being there for college (by their invitation, even!) and I couldn’t afford to do it myself so I had to accept whatever restrictions they set.</p>
<p>I pay about $23 a week for gas, and I have to admit that I luck out on traffic being good on the way too and from school. Winter driving might suck, depending on where you live. Here it never got too bad at all, it was just annoying to have to wake up earlier to defrost my car every morning.</p>
<p>All in all, in my experience I would much rather commute than deal with a crappy dorm life as described in this post.</p>
<p>Here’s my advice to the OP: next time you go home, pay attention to the commute and how life is living with your parents. Maybe drive home a couple of weekends and test out the commute.</p>
<p>October47, Well, I’ve driven down this way many times before college started, and the roads to here aren’t that bad. Rush hour traffic can be bad on the one road but you aren’t on it long to get here. I would probably leave my house around 6:30-7:00 just to get here early. That;s the time I used to leave for highschool too so it’s not bad at all! lol. As far as parental rules, my parents dont really care what I do and they don’t really make me help with anything around the house. Uhhhhhh the thing is I dont want to talk about this to the point where I convince myself that I decided to move out of the dorms… ugh.</p>
<p>One thing to double check, if you are receiving financial aid, is how commuting will impact your aid. At some schools the COA for students living at home with parents is lower than the COA for students living on campus. Lower COA = lower ‘need’ = lower financial aid.</p>
<p>swimcatsmom: That is how I convinced my parents to let me live on campus. They were going to refuse to cosign my loans unless I commuted until we noted that difference.</p>
<p>I’m betting that financially you may not be able to just pack your bags. You’re probably going to have to pay up, at least for this semester. My suggestion is to see if you can switch rooms/dorms. I sounds like the school is fine, so you’d find many other kids who want a more serious approach to the college experience. It’s just the kids in your immediate area. That said, you should probably be able to find another place.</p>
<p>However, I seriously recommend you stick it out, make friends elsewhere on campus, and recognize this is part of the experience too. Commuting isn’t fun at all and you might not get the feeling that you’re growing up compared to prior years at HS and a CC.</p>
<p>My nephew also went through this same situation in his first year: a suite w/ 3-4 others. One became his good friend, the others were kicked out.</p>
<p>Well, they do refund an amount based on the date of cancellation of the room contract. I’m not really even that worried about the money at this point, I just want to be happy. The problem is, I don’t know where I’ll be happy 6 weeks from now. I know I’d be fine at home, I don’t know how much I’d regret leaving here though. :/</p>
<p>Why don’t you dorm for the rest of the year?? Your perspective may change and if you really truly hate dorming, then commute. I don’t think commuting is that bad and it saves you money. I’m commuting so I’m in the same boat. Your financial aid may change but they won’t take away your financial aid. They will try their best to alter your grants and loans.</p>
<p>I’d wait it out for at least the rest of the Fall semester, a lot of your rowdy floormates will settle down as the semester progresses. As you noted, you don’t want to end up regretting moving out of the dorm and if you give it some more time, you’ll be more sure of your decision.</p>
<p>eh, it’s just so weird how my mood changes throughout the day. Sometimes I’m perfectly happy with being here, and other times I just wish I had a place to get away for a full night. Pretty much every day though there is a point where I say to myself “ugh I wish I didn’t have to be here”.
vods91, I’d like to be able to say “oh i’ll stick it out for the year it wont be bad”, but a year is a long time… lol
I dunno, we’ll see how it goes I guess.</p>
<p>It’s not really a year, more like six or seven months when you take out breaks-- school usually only goes from September to April-ish. :P</p>
<p>I already know I greatly prefer dorm living to living with my parents, but I have the SAME mood swings you are having. I go from being perfectly content to crying to wondering if I should have come to college at all to being content again. I think that’s just part of adjusting. Rather than be out the money you might as well give yourself a chance to like it for the first semester, because it’s much more convenient to live on campus if you are capable of making the adjustment. There really is an adjustment period that everyone has to go through. And it may make commuting easier and more comfortable if you got to establish yourself at school as a traditional student first-- make some friends, scope out the clubs and resources, figure out the best times to be on campus and when you don’t really have any reason to be there, and then maybe you won’t feel the disconnect a lot of other commuters feel.</p>
I feel like if I move out everyone will think i’m an idiot/anti-social/■■■■■.</p>