<p>Marite,</p>
<p>You're right. Not productive. Not nice.</p>
<p>I agree - really it seems like a minor prank to me. My son's college counselor confirmed that such incidents in 9th grade are not a big deal to colleges. In some ways it's not a bad thing for these things to happen early on - good lessons to be learned. Better than happening in senior year.</p>
<p>Kids do all sorts of things. I know I did. Sometimes they get caught. Sometimes they make really poor decisions. Usually, no serious harm is done. Sometimes, there are very tragic consequences. If the worst thing my S ever did was lowering myself through the roof into the school, I would be eternally grateful. It is about as much of a crime as TPing a house, in my opinion. I am realistic. Yes, there are consequences for something like that. The kids got suspended. I doubt it is going to upset anyone in admissions. There are teenagers sexually assaulting classmates, stealing cars, selling drugs and cheating on tests. The cross country team acts up a little! Minor lesson learned.</p>
<p>I have two kids, one just completed her freshman yr college and the other a HS Jr. We talk all time about how the decisions you make will effect not only your family, but youself. A 14 yr old should be well aware of right and wrong. I think worrying about how this affects his college application is the least of your issues. Their was a cognitive decision to go up on the roof, another one to break and enter the school (DECISION)...If the police would not have shown up, who knows what might have happen. As a parent, you must look past the "Not my child" and make every attempt to ensure your child understand the consequences of their actions. Not immediately start the "Ohh, this was just a prank done by my young son".</p>
<p>Don't hide this incident later on (deal with this in three years after you review specific applications, not now) but by all means build a rich and rewarding next three years and don't let this cloud or immobilize you or your son. Have you seen the PET scans of boy brains..my goodness he is still developing judgment and this is an overblown "crime" that is likely just peer folly and impulsiveness. Keep up your momentum and tell him you believe in him and you will all ride this one out together. He did something wrong and has shown that he totally gets that. Suffering is good but do embrace the joy of your son's next three years. This is not worthy of a college essay by the way as it does not illuminate his character and inner world at all which is the goal of an essay, and this topic would be a distraction and trivialize those kids who persevere through real hardships and choose to be autobiographical. You may find guidance even more likely to write a supportive note on this matter as they watch him grow and mature. Best!</p>
<p>It's important to remind yourself that nobody, really, has a perfect application. The important thing is that you have learned from the experience, have accepted the consequences ... and won't be repeating burglary 101. As with any oops - whether your lapse of judgement, or my son's too many B's - some schools will see beyond the blot and want you, and with others it may tip the scale the wrong way. Bowdoin WL'd him, UChicago didn't. </p>
<p>So - chin up, give your mom a hug, and assemble a solid college list when it comes time.</p>
<p>Thank you to everyone who responded. I hope that I never gave the impression that we are taking this lightly. My son has had the worst two weeks of his life. Sitting with the police as well as sitting with the hs administration was extremely painful. My H and I have never once given him the impression that what he did was alright. He has not seen any friends for two weeks (he hasn't even asked to). He's a homebody anyway. His social life revolved much around his running. So there's not much of a reality check needed. It's not that we have to think about all the freedom we have given him in the past. </p>
<p>I do think that the lesson that has been learned will be valuable.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, Burlmom, your son, while not being entirely in the wrong, can kiss Harvard, Yale and Princeton (schools of that caliber) goodbye. For many other schools, though, he may have a shot. Your son made a silly decision, and in the long run it will hurt him. However, everyone learns from their mistakes. Perhaps, since he'll be at a less prestigious institution, he will strive to work harder than ever, graduate near the top of his class, and have his ticket punched for grad school. Make the best out of this.</p>
<p>Why must he kiss HYP goodbye? We don't know what adcoms will think of a prank committed in 9th grade, do we?</p>
<p>Bill Smear- that is incorrect. This will not affect his chances at elite schools unless there are further incidents in the future. Why would you say that?</p>
<p>"Their was a cognitive decision to go up on the roof, another one to break and enter the school (DECISION)...If the police would not have shown up, who knows what might have happen."</p>
<p>When I was in junior high, my friends and I routinely climbed on the roof of my elementary school during the summer. The police didn't show up. Nothing happened, except once when a neighbor yelled, "hey you kids, get down from there." We did.</p>
<p>College Confidential has a "College Experts Roundtable" with advice from professional college counselors on how to deal with high school suspensions at <a href="http://www.collegeconfidential.com/experts/index.htm%5B/url%5D">http://www.collegeconfidential.com/experts/index.htm</a></p>
<p>Tahoe, that was a great link. Thanks.</p>
<p>Bill smear- how do you know that he couldn't get into HYP?</p>
<p>I have a very good friend, went to a private school, 2300 SAT, straight A student, many ECs, etc. </p>
<p>He had been suspended in ninth grade for a similar incident as your son - he was not entirely guilty, but he made a stupid decision. The school board said his behavior was "embarrassing" and "a poor reflection of the student at ------ School." Nevertheless, my friend studied very hard throughout the rest of his years at the school. He received excellent letters of recommendation from his teachers, none of which mentioned the incident. He participated in extra-curriculars, and he took seven AP courses before graduation. </p>
<p>He applied to Yale, Princeton, Georgetown, Rice, Brown, and Emory. He also applied as a safety to Rutgers New Brunswick, thinking that he would never need to attend this school. Statiscally, he was in all his schools except Yale and Princeton. Plus, his ECs were pretty amazing (captain of crew, band leader, captain of football team, accomplished linguist, etc.)</p>
<p>He called all the Adcoms before he sent in his application, and he tried to explain to them the nature of his suspension. He explained that it wasn't extreme violence, or assault, or drugs, or anything of that sort. He tried to tell them that it was a silly thing and he had not thought about it when he was in ninth grade. </p>
<p>Well, Yale, Princeton, Georgetown, Brown, and Rice didn't buy it. Schools like that have so many qualified applicants that they must turn away some who are perfectly fit for the college. Of course, when elite schools weed through applications, they immediately toss out two types: students with extremely low SAT scores for the school (500s across the board) and students with a discipline problem at their school. My friend fit in this latter category, and he received rejection letters very quickly.</p>
<p>He was waitlisted with Emory, and he called the admissions office to see what was going on. They were rather frank with him: if they needed to take people off the waitlist, they would take students with clean discipline records. Luckily, the athletic coaches at Emory pulled for him, and he is now finishing his freshman year at Emory. </p>
<p>My friend was VERY lucky that he played sports, and thus the school was willing to give him a chance. As well, his scores were excellent. But the fact that the Ivies, Rice, and Georgetown did not even consider him says something: a clean record in and out of the classroom is the most important thing any applicant can have. Your son, BurlMom, may be an extraordinary athlete or a genius, I do not know. But he will need help from within an elite school if he wants to gain admission. </p>
<p>On a side note, have you researched transferring? Many students are able to transfer to prestigious institutions by working hard at State U. They are given a new lease on college life, and many, having learned their lesson, will make the most of it.</p>
<p>Sigh. All the schools mentioned above are a reach for ANYONE, including people with perfect SATs and perfect GPAs and stellar recs, yadda, yadda, yadda. Doesn't prove anything. And isn't it a bit premature for a rising high school sophomore to consider transferring from state u to college?</p>
<p>I really don't want to be personal or mean, but a rising high-school sophomore with half a brain would not climb through the roof and lower himself into his school.</p>
<p>MIT is full of students who love to play pranks. I can't believe they were little Ms and Mr. Goody Two Shoes in high school.</p>
<p>Interesting Hacks To Fascinate People:
The MIT Gallery of Hacks
<a href="http://hacks.mit.edu/Hacks/%5B/url%5D">http://hacks.mit.edu/Hacks/</a></p>
<p>Let's not compare this kid, still in high-school and under the age of 18, to anyone at MIT. Those students have earned their way to the school.</p>
<p>Do not even attempt to draw a parallel between the nation's brightest minds (students who do need some free time once in a while between hours of studying) and Burlmom's son (who probably had too much free time on his hands and decided to impress his friends by shimmying through the school's roof.)</p>
<p>"He called all the Adcoms before he sent in his application, and he tried to explain to them the nature of his suspension. He explained that it wasn't extreme violence, or assault, or drugs, or anything of that sort. He tried to tell them that it was a silly thing and he had not thought about it when he was in ninth grade."</p>
<p>Sounds like he didn't take responsibility for his infraction, which probably hurt him much more than the infraction itself.</p>
<p>An interesting coda to the Gina Grant story:
Harvard rescinded her admission because she failed to disclose she had killed her abusive mother. However, after this came to light, Tufts accepted her.</p>