<p>Hi there. I figured that i might get a head start on my college essay over the summer, since often i begin to hate what i wrote a while afterwards...This would provide ample opportunity to fix it up.</p>
<p>I don't exactly want to show it to my parents/teachers since it's rather personal; the anonymity on CC makes it easier.</p>
<p>I realize that many parents here are concerned with helping their own children, so i'm sorry if this is a bit inappropriate....but anyway, if somebody is willing to point me in the right direction or say it's okay, i'd be delighted.</p>
<p>It's only an excerpt i've been working on, but it pretty much embodies the essence of my essay. I worry that it may sound overly wordy or pompous or that the subject is too hoit-toity for college-admissions, so if this is true please let me know...I guess i could say it relates to a cynic's existential odyssey, or some kind of epiphany concerning her world-view....It's short enough to send over instant messenger.</p>