Wow @susieknits…feel better! Not the best way to bide the time!
@preppedparent there is no conventional wisdom about how to handle this process where we are. I am certain that my son is the only child in his entire school district to be applying to boarding school, so we say almost nothing outside the home and a very tight circle of friends who really don’t understand why we are doing it, either
@Korab1 …we are right there with ya! My DS is the only one in our area considering BS. Here, it is such a foreign concept that we get the most incredulous looks when he mentions it. Also thrown in are comments like “What did he do that you are sending him away?” “Why would you do this to him, he seems like a great kid?” Even some of his teachers have expressed their opinions of disagreement with our choice, and some of them had to write his recommendation letters…so, we did this blindly and pioneered our way through, confident that this is the right choice for him…especially since it was his decision that he brought forth to us years ago. So, know there are other out there that are not only outside of the BS communities, but actually in an anti-BS environment! We continue to support ourselves within the family (even my parents questioned our plans for BS)…& come M10, no matter what the outcome, we will know this journey will continue on to lead us to better opportunities!
Mom here having anxiety! My cool, calm collected kid is fine. Although, he expressed today that he wants to go to BS so much, he will be very disappointed if we have to go with backup plan (which is only LPS at moment and he is not happy with that option). Focusing on positive outcome…
@buuzn03 I received blank stares from my parents when I told them what was going on. Then an incredulous “why?” Some within the club sports community understand what we are doing and why, but there is no support or guidance, unfortunately. We have managed to figure things out on our own. Having a smart talented kid driving the process has helped!
@buuzn03 and @Korab1 I could’ve written just about the same posts last year!
This forum is a happy place for me not only because I can get a good laugh and great info and perspectives, but also because this is a place where I can embrace being a BS parent with wild abandon. I’ve got great friends and family IRL but I’m mostly alone out here going through this BS experience. No one in my circle had a clue about the significance of M10 or how involved the application process was or how unique (and sometimes baffling) these schools are in how they operate and what they offer, and I’ve intentionally tried to spare them the minutiae. What they care about is that DC is happy and doing well, and that’s all it needs to be. But here, here I can wallow in all the gory BS details! Right now I find myself without a horse in the race this cycle but sympathetically feeling nervous excitement all over again for this round of kiddos and their families; it’s like cheering for your kid’s teammates at an athletic contest.
I have sort of the opposite problem. Many of my son’s friends are also applying to boarding school, so he may be feeling a bit competitive and/or insecure at this point.
@GMC2918 that would be harder, in a way - experiencing that external pressure to get admitted at X, Y or Z school, and the constant comparisons. For us, we can toil away and experience the agony of defeat or thrill of victory in our little nuclear family without prying eyes or looks down long noses.
@AppleNotFar it is certainly nice to have an anonymous place to seek and share knowledge and experiences, and to commiserate over our shared anxiety for the approaching doomsday.
@AppleNotFar this is exactly why I read these posts! Just to know I’m not completely crazy with my angst!
@GMC2918 I think you are probably correct in that it is nice not to have the added stress of comparison with classmates. Although, my kid doesn’t ever seem to be concerned with what his peers are doing. He definitely is just focused on himself. Not sure if that would change in a different environment or not.
@Korab1 hang in there, I definitely know what you are talking about!
I’m just glad to know we are not alone. The minutes to M10 are ticking by and I’ll soon have to find something else to plan–most likely a family trip to Disney.
Reading these posts has helped me, too, with the anxiety and the impatience I feel waiting for M10 and trying to limit how much I communicate those feelings to my daughter, who seems mostly able to tune out the waiting for results. I, too, am confronted with blank or judgmental looks and responses when I have tried to talk about what we have been doing for the last nine to ten months. We know no one applying to boarding schools, just one person applying to an independent day school. So keep on commenting! These posts are cathartic to read!
Much of my DS’s class is applying to BSs or private day schools, and many (including DS) have applied and been accepted to the local Catholic schools. Fortunately DS is the only kid applying to any of the BSs he applied to, so there won’t be any cases of other kids getting accepted to schools where he is rejected or wait listed. Until January this was the focus of their 8th grade year, but once the applications were done, I hear kids pretty much stopped talking about it, and the placement director has been quiet. I think they take the 8th graders on a field trip of some kind on M10. DS is getting increasingly anxious, but for the most part it’s just the Moms silently going crazy…some even more than I am!! The “Chances” posts make me queasy, but this thread is a comfort! I am tempted to plan some kind of celebration for the M10 weekend, but being part of a superstitious family, I don’t want to put the whammy on us.
@buuzn03, @Korab1 - waiting on K3 for M10 & now 5 years into the BS experience - the questions and stares you get continue. We just smile and give the same answers we’ve given since day one and continue to think up clever new twists. K1 did well in BS and got into a top school so some people started to clue in. K2 is thriving in Y1 @ BS so K3 wanted to join the party. I don’t think it’ll ever change but it has been a tremendous experience for our Ks and we appreciate forums like this to see that we’re not the only parents who have experienced it.
Chiming in - I get the same blank looks!
Agree,everyone has a different way of handling this stress. Different strokes for different folks, and the best thing about this board is that it is a place to share the angst. Don’t take your kids’ silence however as a signal they are doing fine. Although it’s true you don’t have to fill the space with your wisdom, these posts remind me that its always a good idea to listen. Check in with them and ask how they are doing. Just listening or letting them know you are available to listen (esp post March 10) helps a lot. My own two kids biggest fear was always NOT wanting to disappoint us as parents. They needed to hear over and over again, they could never disappoint us. I am hoping for all good news for all you parents. Waiting is always the hardest part. Good Luck students and parents! The agony of waiting is almost in your rear view mirror.
we are nervous in the second time round as second kid has applied more schools
My son has not only retreated into a cone of silence, but he also announced to me today that he doesn’t want to hear ANY of the results until ALL of them are in. He remembers that when his older sister applied, one acceptance letter arrived on M9 and another arrived three days after M10! It was stressful. That was back in the days of snail-mail so I’m hoping that a wider use of admissions portals will condense the agony somewhat ;-). Anyway, he handed me a list of all the schools to which he applied, with a column for A/R/W. I have been “asked” (told) to keep a tally and then hand him the results when every school has been accounted for. So, cone of silence notwithstanding, he has obviously put some thought into how he might best manage & process the news. I really hope that he has a couple in the “A” column - he’s such a sweet and thoughtful kid.
I love that story @GMC2918 ! I think your DS is onto something there–getting the results piecemeal stinks.
He has far more self-restraint than I do @AppleNotFar ! I’ll be hitting refresh on those portals all day…
I will be doing the same starting early! Like 12:01!
@GMC2918 funny…he’s prepared! We decided to wait, too, after some hearty protesting by me. I wanted to keep up to date like you and @Korab1!!! But since he’s in school all day and not allowed to access other things (refer to earlier discussions about our BS environment here), we decided (more them than a true we 
) that we’d wait until he got home from school and open them all at once. To make things more difficult, my daughter is home that day for an unused “snow day”…so he’s the only one with a true commitment he can’t get out of. I may just have to get him early!!! Thanks to @GoatMama, I think, or maybe it was @AppleNotFar, we know we can turn off email preview and still check other emails without knowing content from the schools…after all, no cheating!