Advice?

Student Lounge College Life
1

I guess this is mostly a rant.

I’m a senior in college and pretty introverted. I’ve always been really close with my parents, and for the first two years of college I had awful roommates. Now I have my own room and two guys share the other bedroom, and they’re great.

I feel better now, but through the past three years, and sometimes (like earlier today) I just feel really sad and lonely. I’ve made a few friends, but nobody I’m really close to. Mostly I end up missing my mom, we have a lot in common and since she doesn’t need to mother me as much, it almost feels like we’re more friends than mother-daughter. I try to not visit home too often (tempting since home isn’t that far away) in hopes that by keeping busy and hanging out with friends that I’ll get over it, but it keeps coming back. I’ve talked to my mom about it but most of her advice is to keep hanging out with friends and to keep busy, explore the city, etc. But sometimes I feel totally drained after hanging out with people, or I feel alone even if I have company. Reading, writing and exercise helps, but I wish I could just shake missing my other friends and my parents and my dog.

I guess part of this is also because of my dog, who is fifteen now. We got her when I was seven, and I’m 21, so I’ve had her for the majority of my life. She has more health problems, so I know she’ll pass soon, and I know I probably won’t be there when it happens. My parents keep telling me to prepare for it and I’m trying, but I’m scared it won’t do any good and I’ll just completely fall apart (which I guess is normal.)

Does anyone have any other advice? (Thanks for reading this even if you don’t, it feels nice to just get it off my chest.)

2

Going to say… you are near the end of your college career, and probably are not going to make a lot of new friends and start new activities. I think you should feel free this year to spend more time at home, as long as you keep your grades up and stay on track for job interviewing or grad school apps or whatever comes next for you. If it makes you happier to do that at this stage of your college life, I say do it.

3

You’re almost done :smiley: give yourself a little break (not stop studying of course) find something to do during your free time to lift the weight off your chest. Just keep in mind, YOU’RE ALMOST DONE :smiley:

4

I think that we as a culture have this idealized notion of how high school and college are supposed to be “the best years of our lives.”

How silly.

My best years are the ones I’m currently in-- and always have been. Watching my kids grow is the most rewarding experience of my life, even if there are some days I’m very glad I don’t have to repeat.

I guess my point is that not everyone has that TV sitcom college experience, and that’s OK.

If you’re not there when your dog dies-- or even if you are-- it’s OK to be upset. (Hey, I’m a crier. I cry at refrigerator commercials. It’s less painful than punching walls and safer than diving into a bottle of booze.)

So hang in there, enjoy the relationships you have, even if they’re not as close as you would like. And in May, take that diploma, move back to your home town, and get back to the life you prefer.

5

Thanks everyone :slight_smile:

6

I’m a crier too, so is my mom. She cried at a pasta sauce commercial since in the commercial the recipe was handed down from mother to daughter haha.

7

Go spend as much time as you can with your dog. My family dog passed away in September and I am still so sad over it. College life isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and things do get better. Just go and see your dog before you can’t anymore.