Am I Wrong?

Student Lounge College Life
1

Hey Everyone,

It’s MrThatcherite. I’m back… again lol.
I just needed some insight into a slight problem that I found myself to be a part of. You see, my sophomore year just started and with that means a whole new set of adventures and late-night shenanigans. Two weeks ago, my friends invited me to go out with them to the city to have fun and do what college students do best, which is to drink. I said sure and asked them how we were supposed to get there? They said they’ll just take my friend’s car… which is, to put it kindly, not the most reliable vehicle.

At first, I protested because I knew we weren’t going to fit and I didn’t want to get stranded at 1 in the morning because his car wouldn’t start. Of course, they all blew me off and told me to quit being a worrywart. I responded by suggesting we just take my car, it can seat all of us, comfortably and I know it won’t leave us stranded. Their response was, quoting them, “We don’t want to be seen being bougie and flashy in the city”. So after much arguing, I gave in and went along with their plan.

And unsurprisingly, the car ended up with a flat battery in the parking lot in the city and it couldn’t be jumped. I was already agitated by this and they were like ok we are going to have to take the bus back to campus. This is where I finally snapped and said this wouldn’t have been an issue if we just took my car instead of our friend’s car which is known to break down all the time.

Also unsurprisingly, everyone got mad at me and told me to be more considerate. I got more annoyed and just ended up calling my other friend who I knew was in the city to come and get me. They were still in the city by the time I got back to my room.

Fast forward to last week, another friend of ours suggested we go out to party again and this time I didn’t any chances and immediately hopped in my car that can seat everyone. Met at the campus center, same friends showed up with the same car that stranded us. Asked me if I was leaving my car parked there at the campus center and I said no I thought we were going to bring my car this time since his car left us stranded. Again, they said they didn’t want to so I said fine let’s just meet at the club.

I get there a bit early and waited for them. For a solid 30 minutes. Not a single person arrived or called me to tell me they’re running late. Only to find out they changed plans at the last minute and didn’t tell me. So I got mad and decided just to take an unplanned trip to another city a few hundred miles away. I got there and saw a few miss calls from my so-called friends, I called them and they asked if I could pick them up, their car died, again.

I told them no and said they should have thought of that before blowing me off and hung up.

Now fast forward to today, another friend of ours suggested a get-together and a chill BBQ, they said sure if I wasn’t invited. I replied invited or not, I’m not the one with the unreliable junker. Now my best friend is saying I acted petty and unreasonable.

I think they’re wrong and I’m the one being mistreated. Anyone else agrees with me?

2

I think you need to find another set of friends to hang with who hate finding themselves stranded as much as you do, and who have a similar propensity towards “planning ahead”.

Good thing it was just bar hopping and not camping or mountain climbing.

3

@Groundwork2022 Honestly, that’s what I told my best friend. If they berated me for being right then I don’t want their company anymore. Well, there is some silver lining to this, no one is going to vomit in my car now lol.

4

I don’t understand why any of you are driving to go out for a night of drinking anyway. With Uber, Lyft, and what sounds like campus transport options it seems like a poor decision.

5

Sounds horrible, first world problems. Sorry, but I find it difficult to believe you drove a couple of hundred miles to party in another city. Btw, how is your fancy vacuum working?

6

Aren’t you the student who has a $70k second car just for picking up groceries? And you have a top of the line vacuum and a humongous TV in your dorm? Perhaps your friends are tired of you showing off your family’s wealth while putting down the things their families can provide to them. I think you’re missing out. The late night bus rides back to campus are an adventure. What’s wrong with the bus?

7

Yes, because you insulted them. Did that occur to you? Your friends have stated pretty clearly that they aren’t interested in your fancy schmancy car.

Either find another group of friends who also have $70,000 cars, or be a little more humble…and understand that this isn’t the case for every college student. Many don’t have cars at all. Others have cars that aren’t as “prestigious” as yours.

It sounds to me like your car is more important than the people.

8

“We don’t want to be seen being bougie and flashy in the city”.

Ahem, we’ve been trying to tell you how a number of your needs- and prides- come off.

I think your post makes this all about you, how you take offense. Find a group that IS impressed by your trappings.

Of course, that might be awfully superficial.

Btw, see the “life lesson” in this?

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@Mwfan1921 Well, I suggested a Uber but they didn’t want to pay the fare so that was ruled out.

@CottonTales It was not exactly a long-distance trip, more like around 110 miles and it only took an hour and a few minutes on top of that. As for the vacuum, works wonders! Loving it so far.

@austinmshauri Well, actually the grocery mobile is my older vehicle. They aren’t mad at me for that, they were mad at me for refusing to go along with their plan that I knew was not going to work at all. As for the bus, eh, I don’t really trust public transport. Plus, who wants to ride the bus when you have a perfectly working hybrid SUV?

@thumper1 I was only speaking the truth honestly. They knew full well that the car they chose wasn’t reliable at all. I provided a solution in which I had a told-you-so moment. Heck, I even offered to give them a ride so they can enjoy the niceness as well but they turned it down, probably for the most ridiculous reason I’ve ever heard.

@lookingforward I don’t think wanting a nice and comfortable daily driver is being bougie or flashy lol. I’m genuinely taking a neutral stance on this, I just find it unfair that I’m the one being slandered where all I did was try to be helpful in this situation. Also, what life lesson? The lesson of knowing what will happen if you go through a plan you know will fail? Because if that was it, then I’m pretty sure my “friends” learned it the hard way and I learned it the easy way.

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@MrThatcher

You just don’t “get it”. Do you have some kind is social communication disability?

These folks were trying to let you know that they want to be college students…like most college students. The kind that don’t own or drive $70,000 cars. The kind that are sympathetic when a car breaks down instead of having an “I told you so” attitude. The kind who are willing to walk or use public transportation.

The kids who don’t care one bit that you have a $70,000 car.

You are coming across as an entitled brat who just knows it all, and isn’t at all understand of the feelings and desires of others.

Fine…If this group of friends doesn’t share your show off existence, see if you can find a group of friends who do. Surely on your college campus there are tons of other students with similar inflated money values. Find them. Maybe they will be better friends.

11

They were wrong to call you for help. They should have known you would be petty about it.

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@thumper1 If they didn’t want me to be there, then they wouldn’t have invited me twice. Well anyway, the only silver lining of this whole thing is that I learned someone on campus has a Bentley. Now I definitely must befriend him! /s. Obviously, I don’t impose on everyone in any financial sector. I understand not everyone has the same access to finances. I did end up making a new friend out of all this though. Now I’m in the process of booking a quick weekend trip to new york with my new friend. So you know, show what benefits you get from being a nice human and not a rude one.

@mom2twogirls I wouldn’t have been petty if they hadn’t ditched me at the last minute and made go to a completely wrong club on the other side of the city. I waited for them and all they could say was oops sorry we forgot about you. So I think I deserved to be petty back.

13

I am confused as how you have all these things, expensive cars and gadgets yet you have said you will be in debt $100k when you graduate from college.

Maybe you are into creative writing?

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@CottonTales

No, I financed my tuition through the creditors. Way easier than trying to score a scholarship since the people handling those are so picky and literally want your firstborn child. Banks are a lot easier to deal with. Good credit? Check. Able to pay it back? Check. Done.

The electronics and cars are a mix of gifts and self-financing. As they say, anything is possible with Visa, MasterCard, and American Express!

15

Okay. Sure. Gotcha.

16

Silly values. It all comes off as bragging and self aggrandizement. Financed, no less. And the willingness to scoff at the debt.

If you’re at college for the “daily drives,” good luck.

Realize, you don’t find a receptive audience here.

17

Wondering if any college students are reading this thread. Would love to hear their thoughts.

18

You mean, real college students?

19

Apparently, all of your friends.

In July you posted this:

Please try to make an effort to see the connection between your behavior and the way people are reacting to you. Your comment, “who needs friends when you’ve got a world of products at your fingertips,” makes me sad. Is there a counselor on campus that you could talk to? It would help you to have someone you could share your ideas with, and they may be able to help you see things from other people’s perspectives.

20

If you’re a real person, and insist on this type of behavior, you should work on meeting new people and making new friends. You may need to do it on a regular basis.

“ I think they’re wrong and I’m the one being mistreated. Anyone else agrees with me”. So far, seems like No.