ASB Treasurer Speech Revisions anyone?

<p>"Hey Quakers! My name is lovepinesol and I'm running for ASB Treasurer! One of the main priorities of an ASB officer is to raise funds for her school... At a very young age I obtained a piggy bank. This ended up teaching me important values such as responsibility and organization when it comes to money. Because I've always been extremely organized, that quality helped me maintain balance between school activities and extracurriculars. I believe I have acquired the skills to become a very reliable and dependable treasurer. I will take initiative to go beyond my responsibilities as ASB Treasurer employing effective communication with all of my officers and work hard to distribute our assets wisely. Im diligent, hard working, confident, headstrong and selfless. I'm supportive, open, honest, and positive- all these are important leadership qualities because it can be a critical part of relationship building for change. Vote for lovepinesol, she won't make a fool of ya!"
I have a one minute deadline, and I'm giving this speech live tomorrow! I have tried to edit and revise this as many times as possible, but if anyone has any feedback or suggestions please let me know! I'm trying my hardest to make my speech a pretty solid one since I'm new to this school.</p>

<p>I feel that the piggy bank anecdote is a little weak…unless you’re using it as a joke to lighten the mood, it doesn’t really work. Talk about something that you would have the power to do that other people in the club would actually want to do. I’m not sure if this is viable in your situation, but saying that you will try to help organize field trips/visits and set up fundraisers to do fun things related to whatever ASB is. It doesn’t matter if you can’t deliver on all the promises, as long as you make sure that you try your best to achieve them the next year.</p>

<p>When speaking, make eye contact with everyone. Before and after the speech, introduce yourself to other people in the club to personally talk to them to tell them that you are running. Good luck!</p>