Hi, i am writing this because i am very confused. i currently go to a very good school that i honestly dont like, and recently i decided to transfer because i am not happy here, i decided to change my major, and my new major is not available to me here. my parents are supportive of my decision; i am currently a fall freshman and will transfer for the spring.
my boyfriend goes to a school 20 hours away from me and he seems not to be happy there either. the thing is, i am not sure if he is looking for reasons not to like the school so that he can transfer to be closer to me. he says the school is very expensive and he really doesnt see the point in paying that much (were both international), but i really dont see it as enough reason to transfer.
we have talked about the possibility of transferring to be closer together before, but i honestly think the distance is affecting him way more than it is affecting me. i chose the new school i want to transfer to because it is a pretty good school and one of the top 10 for my new major. its good for my boyfriend’s major too, but not as good as the one hes in right now. I don’t want him to transfer just because of me, and im scared that if he doesn’t like the new school he is going to end up resenting me.
my parents know i based my decision thinking about my career, and not about my relationship. they are worried that people back home are going to think that i transferred schools just to be with my boyfriend, which is not the case. i do want my boyfriend to be close to me, but im afraid things are going to turn out really badly. what if we end up breaking up? what if he becomes too controlling and i end up losing all my independence?my mom’s really worried about this last one, because she says college is the time where you discover yourself and grow as a person. will i still have the chance to do so if we go to the same place? will he? I love him a lot and breaking up doesnt seem like an option right now, but im very worried about him messing up his future because of me. i want him close, and i really cant tell him not to transfer because in the end, its really his decision. what do i do? im really worried for him.